Psycho-Babble Medication Thread 1112311

Shown: posts 1 to 16 of 16. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

I have chosen to be a failure

Posted by linkadge on October 18, 2020, at 16:35:15

... and I don't know why.

So many opportunities I have just let pass me by.

Linkadge

 

Re: I have chosen to be a failure

Posted by Lamdage22 on October 18, 2020, at 22:52:21

In reply to I have chosen to be a failure, posted by linkadge on October 18, 2020, at 16:35:15

Well, wether or not mental health issues are a failure is debatable. What kinds of opportunites and how did you let them pass you by? It is not too late!!


> ... and I don't know why.
>
> So many opportunities I have just let pass me by.
>
> Linkadge

 

Re: I have chosen to be a failure

Posted by rjlockhart37 on October 19, 2020, at 20:08:49

In reply to I have chosen to be a failure, posted by linkadge on October 18, 2020, at 16:35:15

don't think like that, it's a cause and effect like thinking, same thing with me. Cause=then something resulted in that, you tend to stick with that memory of failure, of whatever, well something in memory.

I could give myself advice, you get our of the comfort zone, everyday comfort or routine is comfortable, like being the person 1st to rescue someone who is drowning, alot of people just sit and watch it, there has to be a person that is gonna jump out immidiate and save them. It's adrenal release to save someone drowning. Same thing in getting into situations or the world. Get a adrenal kick and yes it will feel sting and pain, but just jump out think of something you would do, and jump out like your saving someone, you have 1 agenda to do

 

Re: I have chosen to be a failure (no you haven't) » linkadge

Posted by jay2112 on October 19, 2020, at 22:54:26

In reply to I have chosen to be a failure, posted by linkadge on October 18, 2020, at 16:35:15

> ... and I don't know why.
>
> So many opportunities I have just let pass me by.
>
> Linkadge

I read the following at my Mom's funeral...I followed it up..with "I guess that is the price of being human. Love, pathos and compassion...as heartbreaking is, I srill would not trade those things for the world." Peart wrote this about Hemingway, after Ernest could barely even compose a response to an invitation to JFK's Inauguration.

"Some are born to move the world
To live their fantasies
But most of us just dream about
The things we'd like to be
Sadder still to watch it die
Than never to have known it
For you, the blind who once could see
The bell tolls for thee..."

~Neil Peart

 

Re: I have chosen to be a failure » linkadge

Posted by SLS on October 20, 2020, at 7:35:37

In reply to I have chosen to be a failure, posted by linkadge on October 18, 2020, at 16:35:15

> ... and I don't know why.
>
> So many opportunities I have just let pass me by.
>
> Linkadge

There are at least two features of depression that will get in the way:

1. Amotivation.
2. Anergia

There are also medications that can cause passivity (lithium) and amotivation (SSIs). I find SSRIs to decrease motivation more than SNRIs (Effexor and Cymbalta).

If you have consistently felt this way since before your de novo (first) treatment, then it is likely that it is a feature of your baseline. If you have consistently felt this way throughout your all of your drug-trials, it might also be part of your baseline.

In other words, depression might not be a characterological trait of yours. It might be your autonomous biological brain disorder.

Was your motivation and energy levels higher when you built your TMS machine? You were younger, of course, and it was earlier in the course of your illness.


- Scott

 

Re: I have chosen to be a failure » linkadge

Posted by SLS on October 20, 2020, at 7:46:27

In reply to I have chosen to be a failure, posted by linkadge on October 18, 2020, at 16:35:15

Linkadge. Just to say things in a different way, do you really feel that you have *chosen* to be a failure? Why didn't you choose to be a success instead?

What went into your decision-making process in concluding that you had a choice?


- Scott

 

Re: I have chosen to be a failure(Linkadge and SLS

Posted by jay2112 on October 20, 2020, at 18:17:31

In reply to Re: I have chosen to be a failure » linkadge, posted by SLS on October 20, 2020, at 7:35:37

> > ... and I don't know why.
> >
> > So many opportunities I have just let pass me by.
> >
> > Linkadge
>
> There are at least two features of depression that will get in the way:
>
> 1. Amotivation.
> 2. Anergia
>
> There are also medications that can cause passivity (lithium) and amotivation (SSIs). I find SSRIs to decrease motivation more than SNRIs (Effexor and Cymbalta).
>
> If you have consistently felt this way since before your de novo (first) treatment, then it is likely that it is a feature of your baseline. If you have consistently felt this way throughout your all of your drug-trials, it might also be part of your baseline.
>
> In other words, depression might not be a characterological trait of yours. It might be your autonomous biological brain disorder.
>
> Was your motivation and energy levels higher when you built your TMS machine? You were younger, of course, and it was earlier in the course of your illness.
>
>
> - Scott

Hi Scott/Linkadge

Link is in Canada, with me, and I am about to start a trial with Moclobemide, which worked amazing for me with high-dose benzo's, bromazapam in particular, and am going to try to control some of the agitation, hyper-arousal with a mood stabalizer, as we go. Do you think this would be a good option for Linkadge? It is MAJOR pro-sexual, and I have dead in that area for almost 15 years. I am not sure what Linkadge's situation is like?

Sorry Linkadge, am not trying to hijack your thread. Have you ever been on Mannerix(sp?)/Moclobemide? It really, really is pro-motivational, I just have to be careful of the hypomania. I am REALLY sick and tired of the amotivational, desexualizing properties of the usual SSRI/SNRI routes. Honestly, I can deal much,much better with good hypomania, rather than just "blaahhhh", irritability, and flattening of SSRI/SNRI's. Link, you said you use Niacin. Have you ever tried a stack of Niacin, B1, and B2? I use that with lethicin/choline..which REALLY chills me out...a nice, smooth ride.

~Jay

 

Re: I have chosen to be a failure

Posted by Lamdage22 on October 21, 2020, at 1:47:10

In reply to Re: I have chosen to be a failure » linkadge, posted by SLS on October 20, 2020, at 7:46:27

Right, it sounds like you are too tough on yourself. Another feature of mental health problems. You still got time

> Why didn't you choose to be a success instead?
>
> What went into your decision-making process in concluding that you had a choice?
>
>
> - Scott
>
>
>
>

 

Re: I have chosen to be a failure(Linkadge and SLS » jay2112

Posted by SLS on October 22, 2020, at 9:14:13

In reply to Re: I have chosen to be a failure(Linkadge and SLS, posted by jay2112 on October 20, 2020, at 18:17:31

Hi, Jay.

> Hi Scott/Linkadge
>
> Link is in Canada, with me, and I am about to start a trial with Moclobemide, which worked amazing for me with high-dose benzo's, bromazapam in particular, and am going to try to control some of the agitation, hyper-arousal with a mood stabalizer, as we go. Do you think this would be a good option for Linkadge? It is MAJOR pro-sexual, and I have dead in that area for almost 15 years. I am not sure what Linkadge's situation is like?
>
> Sorry Linkadge, am not trying to hijack your thread. Have you ever been on Mannerix(sp?)/Moclobemide? It really, really is pro-motivational, I just have to be careful of the hypomania. I am REALLY sick and tired of the amotivational, desexualizing properties of the usual SSRI/SNRI routes. Honestly, I can deal much,much better with good hypomania, rather than just "blaahhhh", irritability, and flattening of SSRI/SNRI's. Link, you said you use Niacin. Have you ever tried a stack of Niacin, B1, and B2? I use that with lethicin/choline..which REALLY chills me out...a nice, smooth ride.
>
> ~Jay

Moclobemide was the worst (for me) drug that I have ever taken. It left me curled up in the fetal position on the couch whimpering - actually making vocalizations that I couldn't stop. It was incredibly painful. What I am most surprised at, Jay, is that moclobemide has not pooped-out on you. More often than not, there is a need for dosage escalation up to 1200 mg/day, and it stops working very early anyway. When someone feels better initially, it can yield a potent antidepressant effect. If it does poop-out on you at 1200 mg/day, you might opt for Nardil rather than Parnate. It is my guess (only a guess) that Nardil is more more potent as a MAO-A inhibitor than Parnate is. I find Nardil to be more pro-social and gives me a more complete antidepressant effect. It reduces amotivation and anhedonia much more for me than Parnate does.

I hope you are an exception and that moclobemide is your miracle treatment.


- Scott

 

Re: I have chosen to be a failure » linkadge

Posted by SLS on October 22, 2020, at 9:30:55

In reply to I have chosen to be a failure, posted by linkadge on October 18, 2020, at 16:35:15

Hi, Linkadge.

Has your perception of yourself improved since your initial post?

I understand how depression can kill your self-image. It makes you feel *lazy*. This might be more the result of amotivation than anergia.

I think I can speak for the majority of posters on Psycho-Babble when I say that you are not a failure here - quite the contrary. Actually, I consider you to be the most valuable member here. You have achieved much. No one is as proficient as you are at remembering and understanding neuroscience. I have watched you evolve as a person, too, over the last 20 years. You are kinder and more generous in sharing what you have with others so freely. These traits, both inherent and developed, are an indication to your potential to function at a job. Now, you just need the motivation, energy, and vigilance to be be able to actualize your potential.

- Scott


> ... and I don't know why.
>
> So many opportunities I have just let pass me by.
>
> Linkadge

 

Re: Thanks

Posted by linkadge on October 22, 2020, at 16:22:50

In reply to Re: I have chosen to be a failure » linkadge, posted by SLS on October 22, 2020, at 9:30:55

Thanks all for the kind words,

I suppose I'm having a bit of a mid-life crisis compounded by mental health issues. I've passed up on so many opportunities to put myself to use in a meaningful way.

Linkadge

 

Re: Thanks

Posted by Lamdage22 on October 23, 2020, at 4:09:22

In reply to Re: Thanks, posted by linkadge on October 22, 2020, at 16:22:50

So still plenty of time. I couldn't really have done anything different up to a 2-3 years ago. It's hard to apply yourself if you are a regular in mental hospital. The key is not to beat yourself up over it. It's not like you went "oh, I feel great, energic and sharp, but I'm going to be a failure and not do anything". Or was it?

Im still far away from mid-life. But the gap in my resume will stay forever. Thats life. Im choosing a job where it doesn't matter that much.

> mid-life

 

Re: Thanks

Posted by Lamdage22 on October 23, 2020, at 4:11:43

In reply to Re: Thanks, posted by Lamdage22 on October 23, 2020, at 4:09:22

It's your words. I'm not saying that you are a failure.

 

Re: Thanks

Posted by undopaminergic on October 24, 2020, at 3:12:33

In reply to Re: Thanks, posted by Lamdage22 on October 23, 2020, at 4:09:22

>
> Im still far away from mid-life. But the gap in my resume will stay forever. Thats life. Im choosing a job where it doesn't matter that much.
>

I'm on a disability pension so my finances are poor, especially as hospital is taking most of my monthly income, but it does have the advantage of not needing a job. This means I have a lot of free time, which I can use for eg. self-improvement, hobbies, reading, participating in Psychobabble, and so on.

-undopaminergic

 

Re: Thanks

Posted by Lamdage22 on October 24, 2020, at 3:19:59

In reply to Re: Thanks, posted by undopaminergic on October 24, 2020, at 3:12:33

I too have loads of free time as I usually only study 2-3 hours for university. I cant do more than that as of now.

 

Re: Thanks

Posted by Lamdage22 on October 24, 2020, at 3:26:00

In reply to Re: Thanks, posted by Lamdage22 on October 24, 2020, at 3:19:59

I wish it were different though. I guess you cant always get what you want.


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