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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Greg on April 23, 2002, at 14:49:41
Madam President (being written while humming Hail to the Chief),
Your post on PBA got me to thinking (a very dangerous thing, just ask anyone who knows me well) about my three daily phases of posting here (or not)...
Phase 1: I wake up full of piss and vinegar ready to get in the face of anyone who pisses me off. I read this board and don't post (especially lately)because I know beyond a shadow of a doubt I will say something to someone that I will regret later and have to apologize. Being your typical male, I really hate to apologize. And I do dislike hurting other people's feelings. My T taught me the 8 hour rule, if something really makes you angry, wait 8 hours to say anything. If you still feel angry after the 8 hours, then say something and you'll likely have a lot cooler head. It really does work.
Phase 2: I've had my Adderall and 5 cups of coffee and I'm feeling a lot more focused :) Unfortunately most of the time I'm so busy at work the only time I have to come here is at lunch. But I don't get so pushed out of shape by opinions I don't agree with. To each their own you know? I spend more time getting caught up on my reading and e-mails than I do writing.
Phase 3: This is the time I hate. I get home from work and I'm really tired and I become the hyper-sensitive person you talked about. Everything hurts my feelings and I take things VERY personally. This is when Shar usually gives me a ration of S**T.... I cave whenever anybody pushes back. I really need to work on that and develop tougher skin.
Or maybe I just need to get my meds adjusted? Whaddya think?
Greg
Posted by medlib on April 23, 2002, at 17:08:40
In reply to Dear President Judy, the 3 phases, posted by Greg on April 23, 2002, at 14:49:41
Hi Greg--
Please give yourself a break! You have teenagers at home; *of course* you cave, who could do anything else? I think that the only thing more stressful than *being* a teenager is *having* a teenager; the rewards seem to come at such a high price. I'll be thinking of you and your daughter tomorrow, hoping things go well with the therapist. Both of you are lucky to have each other, and to have a chance to intervene early (although "early" seems to get earlier every year). However scary things may be at the moment, they are likely to prove a blessing in disguise.
I wish I had been able to "cue in" to my daughter's difficulties when she was 14; it might have prevented so much damage. I was naive, and totally clueless about relationships (still am). Fortunately, my daughter is tougher than I am and managed to survive me *and* her traumas. She still has her problems, but, at least they aren't *my* kind of problems, and she seems relatively happy and successful.
Fingers crossed for you---medlib
P.S. What is ASH?
Posted by judy1 on April 23, 2002, at 18:21:33
In reply to Dear President Judy, the 3 phases, posted by Greg on April 23, 2002, at 14:49:41
Thank you for the proper respect, and I escpecially appreciate the humming. I think your therp has given you some fine ideas, especially the 8 hour rule. As to you getting tougher- good luck. Sorry, to be more constructive, that's your personality- the only time I have a thick skin is when I'm hypo or manic. I just feel people need to respect your right to come to a SUPPORT board and be treated with respect. At ease- Judy
Posted by Greg on April 23, 2002, at 20:37:20
In reply to Re: Sorry to butt in... » Greg, posted by medlib on April 23, 2002, at 17:08:40
> Hi Greg--
>
> Please give yourself a break! You have teenagers at home; *of course* you cave, who could do anything else? I think that the only thing more stressful than *being* a teenager is *having* a teenager; the rewards seem to come at such a high price. I'll be thinking of you and your daughter tomorrow, hoping things go well with the therapist. Both of you are lucky to have each other, and to have a chance to intervene early (although "early" seems to get earlier every year). However scary things may be at the moment, they are likely to prove a blessing in disguise.
>
> I wish I had been able to "cue in" to my daughter's difficulties when she was 14; it might have prevented so much damage. I was naive, and totally clueless about relationships (still am). Fortunately, my daughter is tougher than I am and managed to survive me *and* her traumas. She still has her problems, but, at least they aren't *my* kind of problems, and she seems relatively happy and successful.
>
> Fingers crossed for you---medlib
>
> P.S. What is ASH?Hey Med,
You're definitely not butting in, I appreciate all the support I've been getting. It's been making a tough time a little easier.
I'm trying to be too hard on myself over this. But I know that before I started getting help for my own depression I really put my wife and kids thru hell, and I was really tough on my daughter. I can look back now and see that I had some pretty unreasonable expectations of her and how unfair that was. I can't use my disease as an excuse for the way I treat others either. The only thing I can do now is try to make it right. She knows I'll be there for her. I just wish she had come to me sooner with this, maybe we could have saved her some pain. I don't think anything hurts worse than to see one of your children suffer.
It just seemed like it was a whole lot easier to be a teenager when I was a kid... I'll be sure to let everyone know how things progress.
Oh, ASH is an acronym for A Safe Haven. It's a Yahoo depression support group that myself, Tina, Shar and a few of the others started about a year and a half ago.
I hope you're doing well and thanks again for the support, I couldn't get by without it.
Greg
Posted by Shar on April 24, 2002, at 2:16:43
In reply to Dear President Judy, the 3 phases, posted by Greg on April 23, 2002, at 14:49:41
>Everything hurts my feelings and I take things VERY personally. This is when Shar usually gives me a ration of S**T.... I cave whenever anybody pushes back.
.....Greg, it is a good thing you love me! Else you would tell me to take my ration of sh*t and ... well you know.
Really, I love your gentle spirit, truly, I just hate it when someone jumps you and you end up feeling bad when you haven't done anything!!! Plus, it hurts you, and I hate that, too.
I will look for other ways to give you sh...er, support you when you are in phase 3.
xoxo
YIC
Posted by judy1 on April 24, 2002, at 17:16:48
In reply to Butting in, not sorry » Greg, posted by Shar on April 24, 2002, at 2:16:43
Just read your exchange and decided to stick my nose in, since I'm a President and all. I think we would have no art or music or literary works if not for highly sensitive people who may or may not, I think may be highly creative. Greg you're an architect? Me, I paint and play the piano never professionally but I always wanted to be like the guy in San Francisco who dances around with a violin (he was on the Oscars) except he's artistic and they would say I'm manic. Oh where was I? Yes, sensitivity, my son is really sensitive and highly creative too. Do you see the connection? One of my major problems with psychotropics is it masks the potential for creative genius- at least that's the party line I'm sticking to now :-) Take care, Judy
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