Psycho-Babble Writing Thread 555734

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Cold Cuts

Posted by Toph on September 16, 2005, at 16:01:12

It's a wonder he even had time to conceive his five kids, what with being constantly on the road. Away on business so frequently he never saw the sense in even putting his suits and shirts away between trips. Ostensibly he loved his children, at least he seemed to enjoy doing things with them on those precious weekends he stayed home. His patient wife never complained about the children being his priority on these brief visits. Ironically, each child worshiped their father all the more despite his estrangement, and every moment spent with him took on special significance.

On one snowy December he collected the four older boys to make a snowman. Everyone pushed and padded the heavy snow into a ball until it could no longer be moved. This activity yielded four mostly round white spheres that varied in size commensurate with the age and relative strength of the young manufacturer. The father selected the three sections that he felt best suited the family snowman. The white rotund figure was adorned with charcoal representing its face and buttons. A scarf and broom were added before a hat was ceremoniously placed atop to finish the project. His wife applauded from the window as all stood back admiring their handiwork - all but the six-year old son whose ball remained on the ground rejected as unneeded or unworthy. This child, the one unmercifully teased by his brothers as "the sensitive one," had run bawling to the upstairs window. Adding further injury was his observation that no one apparently noticed his absence from the family revelry. Despite this and innumerable other traumas the boy somehow managed to grow to become and adult and even a father of his own. Sadly, being a decidedly better parent than his father was not sufficient solace and reward to rid him of a lingering sense of self-doubt and depression.

"That's a very telling story," his therapist said looking at his watch, "let's talk about it when I get back from my trip."

 

Re: Cold Cuts » Toph

Posted by cockeyed on September 16, 2005, at 21:32:52

In reply to Cold Cuts, posted by Toph on September 16, 2005, at 16:01:12

Okay, I'm on a run, cheap vodka and having fun.
What a damned perfect title. It can stand alone.
So here I go on a trip of my own. My six year old grandson just got a cast off his arm. He wanted me to see it and I saw no harm. 'Cept I was half-blasted and wanted to nap. But I'd promised and all of that crap. So I drove forty miles and the damn little Sh*t didn't flip and flop just played like a kid. And the 13 year old said his father was a butt-head. And, your
story told me that we are god's here on this earth instead of the guy-in-the-sky-in-the-sweet-by-and-bye [love them hyphens]
My god but it's hard to be god. 'Cause when one is a parent, you've got to look out for all the little sparrows. But, suck it up, yopu got your work cut out for you, 'cause you seem to know what even a bit of neglect can do.
But god I remember my old man's bar-hopping and hate him still and I wonder if there's ever
gonna be a stopping. But maybe you've a chance to get things right...cause time just flies on into the darkest night. Cockeyed.

 

Re: Cold Cuts » Toph

Posted by gardenergirl on September 16, 2005, at 23:48:48

In reply to Cold Cuts, posted by Toph on September 16, 2005, at 16:01:12

Toph,
What an elegant piece of writing. Compelling throughout. And that last--it says so much and pokes at painful places in just a few lines.

Thanks for sharing it with us.

gg

 

Re: Cold Cuts

Posted by Toph on September 17, 2005, at 1:43:54

In reply to Re: Cold Cuts » Toph, posted by gardenergirl on September 16, 2005, at 23:48:48

Maybe if I had written sobbing instead of bawling it would have been better.

 

Re: Cold Cuts » Toph

Posted by wildcard on September 17, 2005, at 2:42:32

In reply to Re: Cold Cuts, posted by Toph on September 17, 2005, at 1:43:54

All i know to say is, i understand. That was pure and honest and raw. Wonderfully expressed.

 

??? (nm) » Toph

Posted by gardenergirl on September 17, 2005, at 17:02:46

In reply to Re: Cold Cuts, posted by Toph on September 17, 2005, at 1:43:54

 

Re: Cold Cuts

Posted by Toph on September 18, 2005, at 10:23:06

In reply to Re: Cold Cuts » Toph, posted by gardenergirl on September 16, 2005, at 23:48:48

Maybe if everything were perfect...


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