Psycho-Babble Writing Thread 436298

Shown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

The children ran to see the waves

Posted by Jai Narayan on January 1, 2005, at 8:52:51

The children ran to see the waves

word got round the neighborhood
each wave was bigger than the last
tiny silver fish delivered onto the sand
the children skipped holding hands
some ran stumbling to the white beach
their shouts and laughter ringing out
a few brave ones followed the wave as it pulled away
puzzled they stood transfixed
where did all the water go they murmured
a swell was riding over the receding ocean
it rose into the sunny air
the children clapped and cheered
the aqua liquid lifted
looking like the boogie man
a few screamed as they pivoted in the sand
many ran faster than light
their spirits flying into the sky over the wave
screams ceased as heads bobbed
the jewels in the crown of a generation
glittering and sinking into the emerald sea

I rest my feet in the calm ocean
I am lifetimes away from this watery grave
saline tears gliding down
my aching eyes
hearts are heavy all over the world

Jai Narayan

 

anyone, what do you think of my poem? (nm)

Posted by Jai Narayan on January 5, 2005, at 16:03:37

In reply to The children ran to see the waves, posted by Jai Narayan on January 1, 2005, at 8:52:51

 

yoohoo....hello will anyone comment on above? (nm)

Posted by Jai Narayan on January 6, 2005, at 20:55:37

In reply to anyone, what do you think of my poem? (nm), posted by Jai Narayan on January 5, 2005, at 16:03:37

 

Lovely poem Jai :-)

Posted by alexandra_k on January 8, 2005, at 1:40:30

In reply to The children ran to see the waves, posted by Jai Narayan on January 1, 2005, at 8:52:51

It made me worry about Pete.
He is still ok, isn't he?
He wouldn't have gone swimming round there...

I don't know what to say Jai
I am stunned
Like we all are

But your poem was superb :-)

 

Oh J*i, it gave me goosebumps

Posted by Gabbix2 on January 11, 2005, at 18:25:54

In reply to Lovely poem Jai :-), posted by alexandra_k on January 8, 2005, at 1:40:30

Sorry I didn't post that, I'd forgotten because I just mentioned it to someone, and didn't actually say anything on the board.

 

Re: Oh J*i, it gave me goosebumps

Posted by Jai Narayan on January 11, 2005, at 18:31:29

In reply to Oh J*i, it gave me goosebumps, posted by Gabbix2 on January 11, 2005, at 18:25:54

thank you so much.
I was beginning to feel invisible on writing.
my best to you.
Ja*


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