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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by AdaGrace on December 15, 2004, at 16:53:52
Can I babble mail it?
Oh why not....I'm going to anyway...hope it's alright
Posted by AdaGrace on December 15, 2004, at 17:09:33
In reply to I have a very personal question for you Atticus, posted by AdaGrace on December 15, 2004, at 16:53:52
Okay it won't let me babblymail you, your feature is turned off......guess I'll just ask here.
If you wrote a poem and someone in a fit of rage threw it away, out a car window......how would you feel?
Posted by Atticus on December 20, 2004, at 18:36:29
In reply to Re: I have a very personal question for you Atticus, posted by AdaGrace on December 15, 2004, at 17:09:33
First, I'd probably make a smart-@ss remark about the fines for littering along the roadway. Then I'd ask the person what got him or her so p*ssed off. I wouldn't feel personally hurt because I've written too much stuff to take a reaction like that to heart. When you put yourself out there -- especially with very personal and revealing material as I have on PB and on my own Web site -- I think part of the deal is that you have to learn how to handle it when someone says it sucks. I guess unless the person was offering constructive criticism as to what areas of the poem needed improvement, I wouldn't be able to learn anything from the negative feedback. So I'd ignore it. It's like getting an exam back from a teacher with big red X's all over it but no explanation where I went wrong; it's of no real value. Did something like this happen to you (if you don't mind my asking) or is this just a hypothetical situation? Part of my ability to separate an emotional response from a practical "how-do-I-fix-it" response is the fact that I've been a copywriter and editor since college, so I'm used to trying to separate constructive criticism from merely nasty comments or acting out. Hope that helps. ;) Atticus
Posted by AdaGrace on December 21, 2004, at 8:00:22
In reply to Re: I have a very personal question for you Atticus » AdaGrace, posted by Atticus on December 20, 2004, at 18:36:29
Atticus,
Here's the deal. Someone wrote a poem for me. Then was very very mean to me on the phone and hurt me. I carried the poem in my purse. Because I was so hurt, after the phone call, I ripped the poem up and threw it out the window. Later in another conversation, this person proceeds to tell me that he is going to try to sell the poem. Afterall he thought it might end up on a Hallmark card or something. I was upset by the fact that actually he didn't really mean the poem to be personal and we began to argue. He told me I should be flattered and I could brag about how that the poem was about me. I'm not like that. This is when I revealed to him that I had done what I did. He was livid. Not it seems because I threw it away, but because someone might be able to retrieve it and somehow use his words and profit off of them. I was completely shocked. He was more worried about plagerism and stealing his words and ideas than me hurting his feelings. I just wanted to ask you what you would think if someone did that to you, because I was starting to think that I was totally insane. As it turns out, I appologized profusely, explained that I was in a very vulnerable place in my life, my heart was broke, yadda, yadda, yadda........and he used that information to completely rip me to shreds. Called me horrific names, said I was retarded, damaged goods, and everything hurtful he could. I am just pretty stunned by the entire experience and have never in my life met someone like that. Extreemly self absorbed, couldn't have a conversation without the topic being centered around him, if I tried to change the subject or interject my own experiences and feelings into the theme, he would blow up. Very volitile human being actually. I think he suffered from multiple personalities, I really do. He was a Jeckle and Hyde to be sure. Anyway Atticus, I appreciate your response. I enjoy your writings and look forward to reading them.
AdaGrace
Posted by Atticus on December 21, 2004, at 11:59:50
In reply to Re: Let's Get More Personal » Atticus, posted by AdaGrace on December 21, 2004, at 8:00:22
Hi AdaGrace,
Well, his ego certainly does seem oversized, and his fear of plagiarism strikes me as a little absurd. Who goes picking through trash along the road looking for publishable material? Who even would want to touch garbage along the road? Most likely, if the poem was tossed out along a highway, it was unceremoniously dumped into a garbage bag by one of those road crews (usually either made up of Adopt-a-Highway volunteers or inmates in orange jumpsuits) and his opus is now in a landfill somewhere. If it was a street, rain and the elements have probably made it illegible or washed it down a storm drain. To write a poem for you (I've done that a few times here for others) and then present it as a gift when actually you're being used as grist for his literary mill makes me think he certainly doesn't think like a poet. The poem and what it communicates to a specific person or to people in general is the central point of satisfaction for me. If profit is someone's motive from the get-go, then you usually don't see the most stellar work. Writing commercially means appealing to the widest common denominator; eccentricity doesn't move Hallmark cards. When I go to work every day at the university I know I'm writing for my bread and butter. That takes my head in very different direction than my work here and on my Web site, because work posted here only has to satisfy me. It doesn't get diluted. Selling the poems I wrote for Malthus or the poem about meeting crushedout or the punk rock song for Sabrina never crossed my mind. I'm not going to offer advice on the friendship, but I get the feeling you're reappraising the whole thing, which isn't a bad idea. Ta. ;) Atticus
Posted by AdaGrace on December 21, 2004, at 18:43:23
In reply to Re: Let's Get More Personal » AdaGrace, posted by Atticus on December 21, 2004, at 11:59:50
I was thinking the same things you wrote, but wanted another's opinion. Thank you for responding. I am in such a shyty place right now, feeling low......hating everyting and when someone does that to me, and I start to believe it, I guess it brings me lower..
Thanks
AdaGrace
This is the end of the thread.
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