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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 5 of 5. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by smokeymadison on December 11, 2004, at 20:30:51
Identity:
Makeshift altar
Built memory by memory
Until it rivals Babel
And the gods grow jealous
That I might knowPeace
Reality
The structure behind the curtain, the façadeDisillusionment burned at such a height
Beyond the sky
Would feed the starsBut the rainfall of stones
Beneath the breath of Chaos
Leaves memories scattered across a barren landscape
Posted by Atticus on December 11, 2004, at 21:19:05
In reply to problems with identity--wrote this, posted by smokeymadison on December 11, 2004, at 20:30:51
Hullo Smokey,
Very elegant language and a great central metaphor. Nice and spare, lean and clean. I've written a poem about this same subject ("Bracelets of Torn Thoughts"). It's on my own Web site (link above) if you're interested. (Just don't read it before eating -- it's pretty harsh.) I agree with you. It's so hard to assemble a sense of self when an illness keeps kicking out the cornerstone. Atticus
Posted by smokeymadison on December 11, 2004, at 22:27:19
In reply to Re: problems with identity--wrote this » smokeymadison, posted by Atticus on December 11, 2004, at 21:19:05
thank you! but i feel like this poem isn't very good. i feel like i could write so much better but my mind is just blocked, limited. partly medication partly i don't know what. i feel so constrained right now--tied down, held back from what i am capable of. but thanks, again.
Posted by Atticus on December 12, 2004, at 18:41:12
In reply to Re: problems with identity--wrote this » Atticus, posted by smokeymadison on December 11, 2004, at 22:27:19
I dunno, Smokey. I think it's better than you believe it to be. And really, there's no standard that you should worry about measuring your writing against. I've been in overmedicated states and/or deeply depressed phases since arriving at PB and still ground out poems. I knew they weren't up to my best stuff, but making the effort was so important to me -- otherwise, it felt like I was letting the illness take something away from me, granting it a kind of victory. Just a thought. Ta. ;) Atticus
Posted by alexandra_k on December 12, 2004, at 19:48:40
In reply to Re: problems with identity--wrote this » smokeymadison, posted by Atticus on December 12, 2004, at 18:41:12
Yeah Smokey, good for you. I haven't been able to write anything for quite some time, but your post inspired me to write to the thread below.
I hate it when you feel like there is something there but you just can't for the life of you get it out.
I enjoyed your poem.
Thankyou
This is the end of the thread.
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