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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Atticus on July 25, 2004, at 19:48:13
Atomic Cafe
Twilight in New Mexico
In 1947
And another
Crystal-clear sky
Unblemished by clouds
Greets the patrons
Arriving
For happy hour
On the flagstone patio
Of the Atomic Cafe.They've come to check out the bomb,
The atom bomb,
To see
If it will
Ascend to heaven
Like a titanic flaming fist
Thrust skyward on the horizon.The bomb tests are the hippest
Show in town,
And the observers
Never miss it,
Anxiously waiting,
Waiting to discover
If the bomb will spike
Their vodka martinis
With a piquant dash
Of strontium 90,
Or remain inert, harmless,
No longer the stuff of nightmares.Their gazes,
Made inscrutable and iridescent
By dark green sunglasses,
Secretly harbor the unmistakable
Wide-eyed apprehension
Of anxious children.
They sit and chatter,
Flinching without moving,
Cowering without ducking,
Made uneasy by the presence
Of the unwanted monster
Newly arrived in their lives,
Dangling silently
From its scaffolding
Miles away.They fidget with swizzle sticks,
With car keys,
With coins,
Make small talk
About television,
All the while
Anticipating
How they'll handle
Their encounter
With this alien force,
Fearful of its roar,
Fearful of its fury,
Fearful that this domesticated demon
May someday, some way
Turn and snap at them.
Has its nature,
So unpredictable, so unknowable,
Truly been harnessed?
Can it ever
Really be
A stabile and trusted member
Of their nuclear family?I watch these troubled souls
From my vantage point
Atop the spindly steel legs
And criss-crossed I-beams
Of the test tower,
Silhouetted against
The streaks of pink and violet
That measure the sun's
Steady retreat,
Noting the familiar
Faces in the distant crowd.
My mother, my sister,
My father, my brother,
All smiling,
All supportive,
All hopeful,
All terrified
That I'll detonate
Without warning,
Without reason,
Without hesitation,
My motives a mystery,
Leaving only scorched earth
Where I once stood.They shift in their seats
At the Atomic Cafe,
Brace their backs
With exquisite care
Against cushions
Stuffed with eggshells,
Their glass-shrouded pupils
Flicking left, flicking right,
Watching, always watching
For any sign
That something's amiss,
That a wayward chemical reaction.
An unintended electrical discharge,
Will trigger the conflagration
That they came
Expecting
But not really wanting
To see.And sometimes I tire of their scrutiny,
And I'm hurt by their fear,
And occasionally
Despite their good intentions,
I want to descend from this vulnerable perch,
Sneak up behind them,
And whisper,
As softly as I can,
"Ka-boom."
-- Atticus
Posted by Jai Narayan on July 25, 2004, at 20:09:17
In reply to poem ... Atomic Cafe, posted by Atticus on July 25, 2004, at 19:48:13
Posted by Atticus on July 26, 2004, at 8:14:34
In reply to oh my......I have always hated the frisky atom (nm), posted by Jai Narayan on July 25, 2004, at 20:09:17
Well, they can certainly be a nuisance, irradiating people without so much as a "Sorry 'bout that." But still, being constantly and almost exclusively perceived as a WSD (weapon of self-destruction) with poor impulse control by the four key people in my support system is starting to wear on me a bit. Atticus
Posted by Jai Narayan on July 27, 2004, at 19:33:59
In reply to Re: oh my......I have always hated the frisky atom » Jai Narayan, posted by Atticus on July 26, 2004, at 8:14:34
We are heading into the time of year I am most distressed.
The anniversary of Hiroshima and Nagasaki.
I posted on the grief site about this.
But I am mystified by the white shadows people saw after the bomb exploded in Hiroshima.The essence of a life lived to it's abrupt end.
So many souls rising all at once.
It must have been amazing in the ethers.
Posted by Atticus on July 27, 2004, at 20:58:56
In reply to Re: oh my......I have always hated the frisky atom, posted by Jai Narayan on July 27, 2004, at 19:33:59
Oh, Jai, I'm so sorry that I was so flip about nuclear weapons and radiation in my previous post. That whole poem was a bit of a temper tantrum, I guess -- the result of a conversation with my mom on Sunday that took a wrong turn and of a day when my meds didn't seem to be up to the task of maintaining my equilibrium, for some reason. I'll check out your post on the grief board. Take care. Atticus :)
Posted by Jai Narayan on July 27, 2004, at 21:36:10
In reply to Re: oh my......I have always hated the frisky atom » Jai Narayan, posted by Atticus on July 27, 2004, at 20:58:56
There is no need to apologise....no need.
You are golden....golden.
I love everything you write. EVERYTHING!
Just keep it coming.
So you are living with your parents?
That must be tough.
I live 5 miles from an aging nuclear power plant.....yeks! They want to do an uprate and increase the plant by 20%. I know we are dead it they get away with it.
Everyone will be rushing away from the plant and I will make a rush at it. How many times can you die in a life time?
I just don't want to die slowly with cancer and all the ugly after affects of radiation. Just kill me if you must.
but I must say my town is the coolest town I have ever seen in my life and I would stay here to my end. I have thought long and hard about this town and I am smitten with the place.
I can't leave.
It reminds me of Chernobyl...and how the people are coming back to the town even though it's way too hot.....
but it's all they know and love....
so they return and are willing to die.
I have never loved a place before.
I love my town with my heart and soul.
My gosh, you are something. You bring the full me. I love it.
I so enjoy our connection.
thank you.
This is the end of the thread.
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