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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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Posted by Caleb462 on November 22, 2003, at 17:34:12
In reply to do you all really want help??, posted by MOTHERNEEDHELP on November 22, 2003, at 16:15:32
> This is what I wonder alot.. My husband has been taking these pills for awile and I'm starting to think that he really likes them and that he does not want help.Does anyone else relate to this.
First of all, really liking does not mean he does not want help. Addicts who have been clean for years may still "like" the drug. Also, if he is in the early stages of addiction he will likely believe he "can control his use", "will not become addicted", etc. and thus he does not see the need for help.
Being addicted to substances can be a powerful thing, it *physcally* alters the brain, and destroy's a person's willpower. Once addiction set in, there is way more to it than simply "liking" the drug. Even before addiction sets in, drug use is a complex issue and there's alaways more to it than simple enjoyment. This aspect of addiction is often ignored, and drug users are often viewed as people who just dont want to stop having fun or weak, lazy people who could stop if they really tried.
Posted by MOTHERNEEDHELP on November 22, 2003, at 21:11:19
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by Caleb462 on November 22, 2003, at 17:34:12
Well, i don't know what to do anymore i love this man with all i have in me to love with, but we have three small kids and i need him more then ever now it's christmas time and he keeps losing jobs and it's so unfair he is not the man i married. I feel like he is just giving up. And when you say the "earley stage" what does that mean? He has been on these pills for three years how long will this last? How bad will it get. I can't talk to my friends about this b/c they would just think he is a worthless bum. I want lie, i'm ashamed of this. I'm only 25 and i have gave this man three kids and 8 years of my life.He went from being a sweet understanding person to a mean hateful person. When he can't get these pills he looks at me and the kids like he could just kill us.When he has them he loves me and the kids so much. It hurts. I'm cryng just typing this. You are the first person that responded, so now im grabbing onto to you and saying i know you can't help me but please just talk to me and tell me what you can. Have you been threw this? My husband and I are having very bad money problems right now so he is really having a hard time getting what he want's. When he came in tonight he said that he had to run back out, well the kids are pretty rawled up around that time when he came in so, i told him to take the two oldest with him well then he sat back down and said that he did want to. He would just wait until the next day to go. Well, that too was fine. Then he started talking about being trapped and how he could not do nothing without me knowing about it. So i knew then he was up to no good. Well after alot of begging and talking I got him to tell me. The reason he did not want the kids to go is that he was going to do something very bad that i don't think i should say on here. But he said that it would give him all the pills he needed and and help us with money too.That is what he said anyway. Well, I talk him down which was not easy b/c he blames me all his problems but i took it all and got him in the bed. So, now he asleep but, im scared of what tomorrow holds for me.
Posted by krazybirdlady on November 22, 2003, at 22:22:30
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by MOTHERNEEDHELP on November 22, 2003, at 21:11:19
what pills are we talking about precisely? your husband has a habit. you are not responsible for that any more than you are responsible for his anger when he can't "feed" his habit. you stated that you have 3 children. they are your first responsibility. i understand that you love him, but what is it that you love? is it what he was or what you wish he could be again? is it what he is now? urge him to get help.
Posted by MOTHERNEEDHELP on November 22, 2003, at 22:36:43
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by krazybirdlady on November 22, 2003, at 22:22:30
he will take anything with codiene in it. so, i'm guessing that is what he is addicted to. He said that he will get help. But, we know that I can't take care of everything by myself. But, I know that I already i'm doing alot of stuff by myself.Do people just over come this or do they have to have help?
Posted by krazybirdlady on November 22, 2003, at 22:45:45
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by krazybirdlady on November 22, 2003, at 22:22:30
some people can get over it by themselves, but they usually have to hit bottom. it is easier if he gets help. but he has to really want help. too often the drugs (codiene, oxycodone, oxycontin) are not physically needed, but they are WANTED. talking to someone about it makes it alot easier. my heart goes out to you...do keep posting and let us know how it is going....i am here for you...
Posted by MOTHERNEEDHELP on November 22, 2003, at 22:50:39
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by krazybirdlady on November 22, 2003, at 22:45:45
yeah he has taken all those that you named. he has three ultraset right now and that's all. so, you can see why he was so worked up when he got home.And i'm very glad that you are posting so fast b/c i do need someone to talk to that understands. have you been threw something like this? if so could you share it with me?
Posted by krazybirdlady on November 22, 2003, at 23:05:23
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by MOTHERNEEDHELP on November 22, 2003, at 22:50:39
no, not those drugs...my drug of choice is alcohol..but i am a pharmacist, so go figure..i have alot of knowledge with these addictions. did he first start taking it for pain? it is a very seductive drug. makes you feel better emotionally, pain or not. it also treats depression, but it is NOT the drug to be doing that. ask him if he is depressed. urge him to see a DR. for proper treatment. but first he has to overcome his fondness for painkillers. there is good help out there, urge him to seek it. maybe show him this post...
Posted by krazybirdlady on November 22, 2003, at 23:20:25
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by krazybirdlady on November 22, 2003, at 23:05:23
sorry, i meant the opiates, not the ultracet. that will just burn his stomach out. no buzz...
Posted by MOTHERNEEDHELP on November 22, 2003, at 23:34:45
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by krazybirdlady on November 22, 2003, at 23:20:25
yeah, i understand he only takes the ultraset to help him to not go threw withdrawal as bad. he hates when he is down to just those.so do you think that ultraset could help him stop? he don't get a buzz off of ultraset? what about tyl 3? do you get a buzz off those?
Posted by MOTHERNEEDHELP on November 22, 2003, at 23:39:16
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by krazybirdlady on November 22, 2003, at 23:20:25
and what do you mean burn his stomach out? what do they do to his stomach, b/c he has been having alot of problems w/ stomach.
Posted by MOTHERNEEDHELP on November 22, 2003, at 23:49:39
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by krazybirdlady on November 22, 2003, at 23:05:23
oh, i do plan on reading these with him. We have went threw alot of these on here. And he likes that i read about this. He thinks it helps me to understand what he going threw. We go to a small drug store in town and the people that work there know us by our first name and i think that they even know that alot of time when im picking up, that even thow my name is on it, it's not for me.And even they have tried to tell me to try to get him to slow down.But,I'm glad that you do understand. what i'm going threw
Posted by krazybirdlady on November 23, 2003, at 8:36:07
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by MOTHERNEEDHELP on November 22, 2003, at 23:49:39
sorry, goofed on the let..for some reason i was confusing it with an NSAID. lorcet is opiate based. at what dosage he has, i don't know, but he will get a buzz, but not as bad os with oxycontin. how much is he taking? opiates will mess with your stomach eventually, plus the tylenol in them is very bad for your liver at high doses. as i understand it, you have a legal prescription? what was it prescribed for? the pharmacists will start to question it eventually, but if is legal then they will most likely fill it. he will have to taper down gradually to avoid withdrawls, which can be very nasty. if he really wants help, he should be truthful to a DR. who can help him with this. i feel for you as well as him, if he is aknowledging it. the first step is to admit he has a problem and seek help. please let me know how it goes....
Posted by MOTHERNEEDHELP on November 23, 2003, at 9:10:18
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by krazybirdlady on November 23, 2003, at 8:36:07
he first got them for his back.About him wanting to stop taking them he says that he needs them to just do everyday things. and most of the time he does go to the doctor he does not want help as far as just stopping he just wants more and more. what do i do about that?
Posted by krazybirdlady on November 23, 2003, at 13:43:23
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by MOTHERNEEDHELP on November 23, 2003, at 9:10:18
yeah...i understand. unfortunately the opiates have gained popularity for everyday people as the drug of choice. they do create a feeling of peace and tranquility. you must constantly up your dosage to achieve that feeling, however. people eventually get to doses so high that they would literally kill someone who is not addicted. it's a dangerous game to play. but he must take a hard look at himself and see what they have made him into. is he now willing to do anything to get them? breaking the law? This is what these drugs will do. they will destroy him and everybody around him. is that what he wants. if he can't feel normal, them maybe it's time to try an anti-depressant. but he MUST want to help himself. right now i think he is caught in the cycle of denying that it's an addiction and refusing to look elsewhere for relief. how far down the ladder is he willing to go? i have seen first-hand what these drugs do to people. it isn't pretty...and it's a long road back, but it can be done. and i know how hard it is to watch, but it isn't your problem to fix, it's his. only he can help himself. please stay strong if you can and keep posting...it's a good release for you...
Posted by rxnurse on November 24, 2003, at 17:50:59
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by krazybirdlady on November 23, 2003, at 13:43:23
This is exactly what I was talking about on the thread about Vicodin. I am very sorry that your husband is ill and that you are going through it with him. Addiction affects everyone in your life, not just the individual! Sounds like he or the prescribing doctor will be caught by the DEA and charged or incarcerated. There won't be any more pills if this happens!
Posted by MOTHERNEEDHELP on November 25, 2003, at 7:47:04
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by rxnurse on November 24, 2003, at 17:50:59
what do you mean caught by the DEA? what for?
Posted by krazybirdlady on November 25, 2003, at 14:12:54
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by MOTHERNEEDHELP on November 25, 2003, at 7:47:04
i'm going to make the assumption here that the DR. will only prescribe so many. i am also going to assume that he has turned to other methods to get more. if i am correct then the Dr. will not be charged and your husband will not be either as long as he has a legal prescription. if he is taking something from other sources , however, that is not what is prescribed for him, then if he were to be caught he would be charged with a drug offence.
Posted by Lindsay Rae on November 25, 2003, at 22:30:36
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by MOTHERNEEDHELP on November 22, 2003, at 21:11:19
MOTHERNEEDHELP, I can sympathize and empathize with your situation, as I've been on both sides of the spectrum. I know how your husband feels, as these pills make us opiate deprived feel "normal" and joy that we couldn't previously feel. I can also feel your pain, as I just lost my fiance, with whom I have a one year old baby girl, to pills. He thought he knew his limits, but he just took too much and died in his sleep. The problem needs to be addressed before it escalates to him using street drugs or getting arrested. You've mentioned that he begged you to get some off the street. There are so many sting operations going on, it's just too risky. Personally, I think your husband should go to a Methadone clinic, where they can set him up on a dose he's comfortable with and monitor him, taking him down slowly if he so chooses, while counseling him on the reasons he needs the pills in the first place. Taking these opioids over long periods of time stops the natural opiate receptor neurons to fire, creating a need for the synthetic opioid just to feel "normal" again.
Seriously, seek counseling before it gets out of hand. Don't let this ruin your family, and be supportive of his withdrawal experience. He may want to detox in a thirty day program, and he might be a good candidate for an antidepressant. Email me if you'd like. I have a lot to contribute to your situation if you want the advice!
Lindsay
Posted by Lindsay Rae on November 25, 2003, at 22:48:27
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by Lindsay Rae on November 25, 2003, at 22:30:36
By the way, my fiance just died on Sunday. He was 27. We are waiting for the tox screening to come back, but knowing him as well as I did, it was an accidental overdose of opiates and benzos. He was supposed to start rehab the morning after he died.
And it's the acetaminophen that eats away at the lining in your stomach. That's why drugs like Percodan become Percacet (-acet for acetaminophen) and Vicodin/Lortab is Vicoprophin or Lorcet when mixed with acetaminophen or Ibuprophin. It's not the actual opiate that has a negative effect on your liver or stomch.
Posted by krazybirdlady on November 25, 2003, at 23:57:37
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by Lindsay Rae on November 25, 2003, at 22:30:36
"" There are so many sting operations going on, it's just too risky."
i have to agree, it is a very dangerous road to be taking. i think that maybe his dosage is too high to think he can do this by himself. this kind of abuse has to be stopped for his own health. Stomach, liver and even kidney disease can develop. he is 27. too young for this. he has to seek treatment....
Posted by MOTHERNEEDHELP on November 26, 2003, at 7:52:50
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by Lindsay Rae on November 25, 2003, at 22:48:27
Ok, I do know that he need's help. He got 20 loratabs on Sunday night. He started calling me yesterday from work (he is working right now) saying that he had to get more. I do think he is really tring to make them last. I do think he could do better then he is doing. He gets up at 6:00 AM and get's in the bed around 11:00 PM so I think that is why he is needed so many but. I won't this to stop. If I was to tell him your story about your bf dieing he would just say "I have to die of something." Or he would say "well when i leave for work I might be in a wreck so maybe i shoud not leave the house today." How do I find a Methadone clinic? I would email you But I did not see your email address. mandy
Posted by pixygoth on November 27, 2003, at 6:29:37
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by MOTHERNEEDHELP on November 26, 2003, at 7:52:50
I know little about this, so I won't go on... BUT I hear that Methadone is more addictive than codeine/opiates. I know that that is really all they have in detox clinics or whatever, but just bear it in mind and research it... you don't want him addicted to methadone and then *also* going out to look for a buzz off something else.
Good luck and take care,
S
Posted by MOTHERNEEDHELP on November 27, 2003, at 22:03:28
In reply to Re: do you all really want help?? » MOTHERNEEDHELP, posted by pixygoth on November 27, 2003, at 6:29:37
HE WENT TO JAIL TODAY FOR TRING TO BREAK IN A DRUG STORE SO UNLESS ANYBODY CAN HELP ME TAKE CARE OF MY KIDS AND PAY MY BILLS THEN I JUST GOING TO GIVE UP!!! IM TIRED AND VERY HURT THAT HE DID THIS TO ME ON THANKSGIVEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by Luxy on November 27, 2003, at 22:30:13
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by MOTHERNEEDHELP on November 27, 2003, at 22:03:28
Motherneedhelp...Mandy,
Don't give up! You will get through this time. Family, friends, the government...there must be some way.
I'm so sorry for you...I wish you all the strength and courage you will need. Keep posting...it helps.xx
Luxy
Posted by MOTHERNEEDHELP on November 27, 2003, at 22:42:36
In reply to Re: do you all really want help??, posted by Luxy on November 27, 2003, at 22:30:13
i'm sorry, but i am at the end of my rope. i've nothing left in me to give. i don't have anybody to help me and even if the goverment did offer some help it just would not be enough. I'm letting my child sleep with me so i can have something to hold on too tonite but ill just probably cry the night threw. this man needs help "yes" but tell my heart that. I need him I LOVE HIM. I feel that he is just gone and i'm empty inside. I want him here. I just don't know why i do
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