![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by alexandra_k on December 16, 2013, at 22:39:28
so... i'm not very good at it.
i have a floor-mate. he is nice. we hung out for a bit one evening. he stops by sometimes and knocks lightly which seems to... give me the option to ignore him. which is really nice of him, actually. i did do a bit of a panic at some point that i'd start to feel like i had to be silent and then get the escalation of silence / magnification of noise thing going on... but he seems okay about my not answering the door sometimes. not taking it personally. so... friend.
he keeps giving me stuff. he gave me a few internet cables. he is like 'i've got far too much stuff! trying to get rid of it!' it was great to have a longer cable... but now i've got a few other cables. and of course i get that what i should do with them is pass them on to others who may need / appreciate them. (technically we bring out own cable but some of the rooms have them in there already). but now i feel under social obligation to meet / hang out / see about the cable situation etc... it just... feels like social pressure? but i feel guilty / mean in just having the cables sit there in my room and he won't take them back...
he gave me an electric frypan. like a... roasting one? with a thermostat. i tried making stew... but the thermostat isn't sensitive enough to keep things on a low simmer - so i had to stand over it playing manual thermostat for a couple hours and still the meat was chewy aargh. but mmm... i need a slow cooker to compliment that... or maybe microwave... anyway... i can fry things in my room... at a low heat. i mean... i wouldn't try and sear anything or anything like that. need to be very mindful of setting off the smoke detector... need to be very mindful of preparing everything before hand etc etc because there is no elbow room at all. but it is possible, yeah. which makes me very happy.
but also... like i need to give him something back, yeah. but... ur... what? what sort of thing... i don't understand.
sigh.
he doesn't much drink alcohol. will just sort of accept it to be polite... so that won't work...
Posted by alexandra_k on December 19, 2013, at 3:49:30
In reply to social reciprocity, posted by alexandra_k on December 16, 2013, at 22:39:28
chicken chili basil mmmmm.
Posted by alexandra_k on December 19, 2013, at 3:52:10
In reply to Re: social reciprocity, posted by alexandra_k on December 19, 2013, at 3:49:30
so i AM happy. but one day i will have an amazing kitchen. with balanced knives. and cast iron pans. and heavy bottomed pots. and gas elements.
i hear in some cities you can rent-a-kitchen space for an hour or two... a day... or an afternoon.
then you make your weeks worth of food and freeze it.
yeah.
Posted by alexandra_k on December 21, 2013, at 11:16:19
In reply to Re: social reciprocity, posted by alexandra_k on December 19, 2013, at 3:52:10
i read something not very long ago but i can't remember where. some things... i know that i'm missing something / there is something that i'm not getting... there are a few things like that...
one of the things i don't get is those strategy games like diplomacy... i don't understand how they are about anything other than luck or chance or whatever. anyway... the book / article said about how you listen to what the person is saying (about how they promise to help you by doing this and that and the next thing) and then you put yourself in their position and see what would be in their interests / think about what is in it for them.
then you know whether to trust them (mutual benefit) or not.
of course. obvious, huh.
sigh. i guess a fair few people don't get this for certain other people to get such a kick out of the game...
Posted by alexandra_k on December 21, 2013, at 11:26:22
In reply to Re: social reciprocity, posted by alexandra_k on December 21, 2013, at 11:16:19
i got offered a place for bio-medical science
:)
happy. i was a little worried after declining health science (the only other pathway to med).
i...
i honestly don't know about med.
i...
i honestly don't know about the tropo thing, either. i was feeling all inspired after hot yoga, but i actually don't cope at all well with the heat. i feel... horribly naked exposing my arms and legs... and i just... feel like a freak. out of place for covering things (stand out). out of place for trying to dress 'normal' even. i can't pull the later off, anymore. it has been so long since i've had the money to spend on clothes... and that has always been a bit of a tricky thing for me... jeans and hoodies suits me better...
and the whole autistic thing... wtf is going to happen with that? i feel... like a freak. i... don't know that i'm going to get anything helpful out of community mental health. but they will make me practically f*ck*ng beg them to get anything at all. i feel... humiliated. miscommunications... the whole system is set up to make happy puppy noises...
the domain... i thought i'd enjoy it. the couple time i've walked in it... i was the only person walking by myself. the only person not with a partner or a family. no joke. people were staring at me. honestly. i don't get that from other places... but i got it constantly from the domain.
this is why people become morning people, i guess. that is why one wants to be a morning person. and take up swimming with your head under the water. or sailing... all these things that people do...
anyway... perhaps it is proximity. one must not stray too far from campus.
Posted by alexandra_k on December 21, 2013, at 19:36:11
In reply to Re: social reciprocity, posted by alexandra_k on December 21, 2013, at 11:26:22
sigh.
i'm alright. i hate this time of year. people simply will not give you the option of opting out of christmas. of treating it like just another day should that be what you choose to do. i guess that means there isn't enough diversity for people to have different holidays etc. gives the sheeple their way of monitoring the freaks who can't / won't do the whole social thing this time of year.
i'll probably do what i did last year... write a bit... get fairly drunk... then that will be that. i mean, it isn't like i can go for a walk or anything. one cannot be seen alone on christmas. bad enough at other times. i wonder if this is particularly hard for people because i'm female... but whatever whatever i can see your pity. ugh. people are gross.
i think it is a fear thing... you have to convince people that you desperately want them to like you. you desperately want them to accept you. if you don't do this... then you better be surrounded by other people. god forbid you prefer your own company. people will not let that be.
perhaps that is why it is hard to find people who can refrain from doing harm.
don't mind me... i'm just cranky... i need to get out... i need things to be back towards more normal... this part of the world goes on lockdown until january 3. it is the main summer holiday / crazy unnecessary festive season of the year...
i'm looking at doing an intro calculus course for summer school.
my phd... i don't know what is possible for me. i need to email my supervisor something... very soon. and see if he is still alive at the very least.
i'm scared.
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Social | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.