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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 7 of 7. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by alexandra_k on September 6, 2013, at 22:39:26
Is the people who like spending time in gyms...
Hanging out in the change rooms (ugh).
Or hanging out socializing on the floor (ugh).I think the communal change rooms was the main reason I didn't join the gym / play a sport earlier. I got the courage to join up when someone said trackies were okay, and when I lived close enough to change and shower at home.
Took about a year before I was persuaded of the virtues of black spandex / lycra / compression that doesn't change color when you sweat and that is nearly dry as it comes out the washer. I have to wear 2 layers because I think it goes kinda see through when you squat all the way down, and I hear sometimes people blow the *ss out of their pants and I would be mortified if that happened. I will still change in the shower or toilet stall rather than in front of the girls who are sitting around texting (or videoing) or spending half an hour on their hair.I think it is about modesty... Other people are like 'I'm okay with my body!' Good for them. I just don't see how... Sharing it with everyone is desirable. I don't get it.
Am I like... The chinese water torture person? It has been so long since I've been intimate with anyone (if I ever have been) that the lightest touch feels like being hit in the face? I can't tolerate it...
I don't see how people can get a massage from a stranger. Or... Or from someone who is not a stranger. From most people, I mean. Even things like... Getting your hair cut. I hate it. Someone else in your face doing what THEY want with part of you. Not taking 1/2 the care that you would... Dentist... I'll go, but I'm reluctant. I don't think that I'm worse about this than most... Cervical smear... Not gonna happen.
Posted by Dinah on September 7, 2013, at 10:55:13
In reply to The trouble with gyms..., posted by alexandra_k on September 6, 2013, at 22:39:26
Pap tests are awful and leave me shaky all day. I manage to do them, but I have to mildly dissociate to manage. I later can't remember what on earth was discussed. I keep having some sort of intrusive thought that I was supposed to schedule a bone density scan...
I too am modest. I can still remember being bridesmaid for a bride who cheerfully dressed in front of us. I still snuck in the bathroom to change. This is one of the many reasons I got out of PE by taking band in school.
We finally joined a gym. Nothing like you are doing of course. Mostly walking, and occasionally using the machines (which still make me feel sick and dizzy for some reason). But we arrive dressed and leave dressed in gym clothes and change at home. Even when we use the pool we put our pool stuff on under our clothes and leave wettish.
I don't see any reason why you can't be yourself and do what you find comfortable. Unless it gets in the way of whatever socializing you wish to do there. We don't have any real desire to socialize. Just to get exercise out of the brutal heat.
Posted by Poet on September 7, 2013, at 11:21:56
In reply to The trouble with gyms..., posted by alexandra_k on September 6, 2013, at 22:39:26
I swim three times a week at a high school pool. In the summer I wear a swimsuit cover up over my suit so I don't have to change in the locker room. Otherwise I wear my suit under my clothes and after swimming cover with my towel and don't put on a bra and run out the door.
Other women stand naked in the shower and talk. I don't like my body fully clothed and making small talk naked horrifies me.
I haven't had a pap smear or mammogram in years (which I know is dumb as there's good reason to have them.) I finally started seeing a chiropractor for pain in my calf and even though I don't like to be touched, I couldn't take limping in pain any longer. At first it felt like he was using a crowbar on me, now it's more like a butter knife.
Poet
Posted by alexandra_k on September 7, 2013, at 21:17:06
In reply to Re: The trouble with gyms... » alexandra_k, posted by Dinah on September 7, 2013, at 10:55:13
That is great that you joined a gym! Doing more than you usually do is the way to make progress. Whether it be walking or whatever... Your body adapts to what you get it to do. Maybe the sick / dizzy is something to do with your breathing? I think for some people the exertion of exercise can feel like the exertion of anxiety... Induce mild panic feelings... I've managed to channel my anger / determination into moving the weight... But thinking back... It took me months to learn how to do that. To come to learn how my muscles would respond to failure (wouldn't simply drop the weight). To come to learn I was capable of doing much more than I thought I could do (to learn to work through pain and discomfort to discover endorphins). It takes a while to learn how to try, if that makes sense.
This has only become a bit of an issue now because of living a commute away from the city so needing to shower at the gym. I'm aware of taking up a shower stall for a long time due to dressing in there. I've started to become aware that some people like to remain naked for as long as possible and typically these people will put themselves somewhere central so it is really hard to avoid eye contact etc with them as you enter the change room or exit the toilet or shower stall... Ugh... Apparently the mens change rooms is worse ahaha. I have just come to realize... That some people really do seem to just go to the gym to talk to people on the floor and hang out with naked people in the change rooms. Ugh. Exhibitionist I am not. For reals.
Posted by alexandra_k on September 7, 2013, at 21:32:59
In reply to Re: The trouble with gyms..., posted by Poet on September 7, 2013, at 11:21:56
I used to have trouble with swimming too, but then I got a light wetsuit with shortish arms and legs. Fine for the ocean, okay for cold pools. Got a few looks at indoor heated pools, but too bad. Not sure where / how that managed to disappear over the years...
I hardly swim now, but have compression gear that I guess I'd swim in... I love the compression gear... It makes me feel like a cat... Black and sleek... And combat fit, too. I guess because the high necked / long sleeved top looks a lot like the tops the MMA fighters wear... I think of the chick off the matrix jumping off walls and stuff :-) Even if I am a bit podgier, I can dream ahaha.
> I haven't had a pap smear or mammogram in years (which I know is dumb as there's good reason to have them.)
Yeah, I know it is dumb not to have them, too. But... I don't think I could bear it.
I was alright seeing the physio for my feet... That was okay... I didn't like but was able to tolerate the nurses bathing me when I hurt my feet... Because there wasn't any other choice, I guess... Maybe because I had gradual exposure to what was going on, too, with gradually coming out of the drug induced haze. I remember going nuts at the surgeon though. Throwing something at him, even. He waked in while I was being bathed and didn't apologize and get out, he just kinda stood there. The nurses thought it was hilarious... Not sure if it was because he ususally stood around watching but I wasn't conscious or if it was more that they would have loved to have thrown something at him occasionally, too.
I think the physio thing was different from a massage thing because the former is about health whereas the latter is about... That was why I thought I would be okay training to be a physio but I'd never in a million years go see or train to be a massage therapist. I do think that I'll be okay with the medicine thing... Taking people's blood pressure... Listening to peoples chest etc... Because it will be professional. Medical. But I guess I have some concerns after physio... Will I really be able to handle it when we are doing all our learning by practicing on each other... What will make it different from physio? From the personal training course when I bailed because I couldn't tolerate doing the skin folds?
I don't know.
I guess that is a good reason to get into psychiatry ahaha. But still... You have to do all the basic sh*t first...
I tell myself it will be okay because the people will be different. Will they? We will see, I guess. We will see...
Posted by Phillipa on September 7, 2013, at 22:58:06
In reply to Re: The trouble with gyms..., posted by alexandra_k on September 7, 2013, at 21:32:59
I'm one of those people. Since a young girl was on a swim team and we all walked around naked and showered in open stalls with each other. No one looked at the others. We just talked and showered.
Since I also was an RN am very comfortable with naked bodies as when this is all you see things are just that things. Non sexual objects. I used to get a massage weekly was heavenly. A Sheet covers you and one body part exposed at a time. The professionals don't view the naked body in parts and not in a sexual way. I've never had a problem even to this day of being touched by others. My PT guy has to press into my pelvis to realign stuff. Not an exhibitionist just comfortable with nudity. Phillipa
Posted by alexandra_k on September 9, 2013, at 20:29:59
In reply to Re: The trouble with gyms..., posted by Phillipa on September 7, 2013, at 22:58:06
Yes, it does make sense that if you grow up with it happening... It never really becomes anything of a deal. I do understand that there isn't anything intrinsically sexual about the naked body. It isn't that... I think that part of it for me was that I spent a lot of time with a very good friend who was about 4 years older than me while I was going through puberty. She was very very very particular about covering up her body etc (had been sexually abused by her father). I got some of my feelings from her, I think. Copied her behavior and eventually came to adopt the sentiments, too. Was raised as an only child without siblings... I don't remember us actually having showers after PE at school... I can't remember if there were showers in the High School change rooms... I actually don't think there were... Hmm... Actually yeah, there were, but we never used them for compulsory PE and I dropped PE soon as possible... Then quit hockey because it interfered with my smoking...
Apparently the feeling was that people were particularly attracted to physiotherapy etc as a profession because they enjoyed physical contact. The thought was that the field simply attracted those kinds of people. I... Thought it would attract more of the people who had been through extensive rehabilitation for injury... Rather than the touchy-feely-gropy types... But what would I know... Apparently it was important to learn on the 'easy cases' first (people who enjoyed being touched by nearly everyone) then see people like me (more particular - who give off 'back off' signals every now and then) as a harder, special case. I think that is perhaps backwards. In the sense of being appropriately sensitive to obtaining consent / permission. Most people are going to feel weirdly vulnerable... And would want to know that the person would in fact back off if you needed / wanted them to... I would have thought... But whatever... What would I know. Apparently it is all about 'developing social confidence'. Because really... In the face of inability to acquire specialist knowledge / skills... What else do some people have?
(And I guess the thought is those fooled by their confident demenour... What, exactly? Deserve the 'care' they get?)
I think mostly it was about professionalism, or the basic lack of it. I forget... I've been socialized to be professional already with respect to my teaching. I have 'teaching mode' and it isn't much of an extension for me to see that clinical mode is an extension of the same thing. Other people have a harder time of it... The problem with it is that without the 'clinical mode' it is a bunch of people hanging out together (not particularly focused on what they are doing since they don't have particular ability to focus as yet) groping about. But it is okay - because they are enjoying it. They are enjoying themselves and having fun learning. That is the thought. I think... Ugh.
This is the end of the thread.
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