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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 22 of 22. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by hyperfocus on November 20, 2011, at 9:44:24
Never punctual - usually more times late than on-time. Walking into the office at 3 P.M. Many, many sick days. Low energy - unable to sustain effort on routine things, Unreliable - cannot be depended on for even the simplest things. Always procrastinates. Very bad time management - constantly over-estimating what can be realistically done in time given. High anxiety levels - misses deadlines or completely abandons work at crunch time. Sometimes disappears for days at a time - no explanation. Communication blackouts- does not answer phone or return calls for days.
Not professional - sleeps at desk or in bathroom. Misses meetings with staff or clients or anything involving people interaction. Borderline - hurt and upset and resentful at the slightest criticism. Cryptic vague explanations of behavior. Constantly makes promises about feeling better and starting afresh every month or so. Resistant to asking for or receiving help. Wants to be treated like everybody else; unable to see pattern of behavior requires different treatment from others.
Posted by Dinah on November 20, 2011, at 9:50:41
In reply to Are you a flake at work?, posted by hyperfocus on November 20, 2011, at 9:44:24
Are you my boss? It's uncanny.
:(
I think I underestimate the biological component of my illness. I ride the crests and waves of being somewhere on the bipolar spectrum and am rarely aware of it unless it gets as bad as it was the last week or two.
And time management - That's a biggie. Even if I'm working steadily, I still don't calculate correctly the amount of work I can do by deadline.
Posted by floatingbridge on November 20, 2011, at 9:57:24
In reply to Re: Are you a flake at work? » hyperfocus, posted by Dinah on November 20, 2011, at 9:50:41
hf, of everything you list, wanting to be treated like everybody else I find most egregious :-)
Posted by Phillipa on November 20, 2011, at 10:48:12
In reply to Re: Are you a flake at work? » Dinah, posted by floatingbridge on November 20, 2011, at 9:57:24
When I worked loved it but now work on own so time management my own I guess. Phillipa
Posted by sleepygirl2 on November 20, 2011, at 11:07:36
In reply to Are you a flake at work?, posted by hyperfocus on November 20, 2011, at 9:44:24
And yet... Many things he does well
somehow, I don't doubt thatI'm a mess at work. I feel like I've got a big sign on me that says "f*ck*d up".
I just wrote a little more about that, but deleted it. It's a bit uncomfortable to say.
Maybe I'll just give myself credit for managing to keep showing up, as flawed as I am.What's up hf?
Posted by ed_uk2010 on November 20, 2011, at 14:48:51
In reply to Are you a flake at work?, posted by hyperfocus on November 20, 2011, at 9:44:24
>450mg amitriptyline single dose at night.
450mg? I would be dead.
Posted by floatingbridge on November 21, 2011, at 17:53:30
In reply to Are you a flake at work?, posted by hyperfocus on November 20, 2011, at 9:44:24
Hey hf, how are things going?
Posted by sigismund on November 21, 2011, at 23:07:01
In reply to Are you a flake at work?, posted by hyperfocus on November 20, 2011, at 9:44:24
I was such a wreck after 25mg amitriptylline that I only repeated it once and never again.
I could not sleep for a month and still I wouldn't take it.
Posted by Phillipa on November 22, 2011, at 18:31:08
In reply to Re: Are you a flake at work?, posted by sigismund on November 21, 2011, at 23:07:01
Understandable had a similar experience before on benzos with some TCA said was an upper and downer. I walked the streets all night. Nasty stuff!!!! PJ
Posted by tetrix on November 27, 2011, at 16:07:01
In reply to Are you a flake at work?, posted by hyperfocus on November 20, 2011, at 9:44:24
oh yes, I slept on bathroom floors..
Posted by hyperfocus on November 29, 2011, at 23:51:29
In reply to Re: Are you a flake at work? » hyperfocus, posted by Dinah on November 20, 2011, at 9:50:41
It was actually extrapolated from an article on 'bad employees' describing an employee who suffered from bipolar. It's not surprising though that people with depression and anxiety and insomnia would fit a particular pattern of work behavior. Insomnia alone made me like 50% disabled
The thing I like most about being in a community like PB is that I've realized how utterly unspecial I am. For many years I was so isolated because of my illness, convinced that nobody else in the world felt how I felt or behaved the way I did.
Posted by hyperfocus on November 29, 2011, at 23:54:37
In reply to Re: Are you a flake at work? » Dinah, posted by floatingbridge on November 20, 2011, at 9:57:24
That's sweet fb, thanks. You should always keep that in mind about yourself. I'm absolutely completely sure I couldn't do what you do every day.
Posted by hyperfocus on November 30, 2011, at 0:09:17
In reply to Re: Are you a flake at work?, posted by Phillipa on November 20, 2011, at 10:48:12
I definitely enjoyed some parts of working. Time management is a big problem for me now - a lot of the time I wish I had more structure and goals and deadlines and accountability for my hours. There's a lot of systems people have come up - Getting Things Done et.al
Posted by hyperfocus on November 30, 2011, at 0:13:46
In reply to Re: Are you a flake at work? » hyperfocus, posted by sleepygirl2 on November 20, 2011, at 11:07:36
It wasn't about me particularly, although I was all those things. Just observations on the hard times a lot of us have with work, for the same reasons.
>And yet... Many things he does well
I'm pretty sure if asked the people you work with would say the same about you sg.
Posted by hyperfocus on November 30, 2011, at 1:05:51
In reply to Re: Are you a flake at work?, posted by ed_uk2010 on November 20, 2011, at 14:48:51
> 450mg? I would be dead.
No kidding. So far I've managed to stay on the right side of TCA toxicity for the most part, but it's a razor thin margin.What else am I supposed to do though - it's the only thing that combats the dissociation and depression and makes me sleep at night. Anywhere outside this dose doesn't feel like living to me.
Posted by hyperfocus on November 30, 2011, at 1:13:28
In reply to Re: Are you a flake at work?, posted by sigismund on November 21, 2011, at 23:07:01
25mg is WAY OVER what you should start at for sleep. Different people react very differently to the same dose. My aunt takes like a sliver - less than 5mg - for pain and sleep and she still complains of sleepiness the next morning if she takes her dose after 8.30p.
I have to say though I've never read of anyone even with the most intractable insomnia failing to sleep uninterrupted on amitriptyline. It's waking up the next day that's mostly the issue. It has its uses like everything else. Maybe you could try a smaller dose like 5mg again.
Posted by hyperfocus on November 30, 2011, at 1:15:22
In reply to Re: Are you a flake at work?, posted by tetrix on November 27, 2011, at 16:07:01
Been there did that. The silliest thing was assuming nobody knew about it.
Posted by floatingbridge on November 30, 2011, at 9:08:06
In reply to Re: Are you a flake at work? » floatingbridge, posted by hyperfocus on November 29, 2011, at 23:54:37
hf, I was completely worried about you! Honestly, thanks for writing.
Posted by Phillipa on November 30, 2011, at 18:13:10
In reply to Are you a flake at work?, posted by hyperfocus on November 20, 2011, at 9:44:24
Hp how thoughtful to answer each and everyone on your thread. Sounds like you feel better to me. Phillipa
Posted by williamockham on December 7, 2011, at 14:16:45
In reply to Are you a flake at work?, posted by hyperfocus on November 20, 2011, at 9:44:24
I think I've done about a months worth of work over the 2 years I've had my current job. Thankfully, no one knows anything about how what I do corresponds to workload.
Posted by sleepygirl2 on December 27, 2011, at 22:11:53
In reply to Re: Are you a flake at work? » sleepygirl2, posted by hyperfocus on November 30, 2011, at 0:13:46
It can be so very, very difficult
:-(
I really regret that I didn't find a career with
serious consideration of my social anxiety and difficulty functioning.
I can do some things pretty well :-)
But in some ways I'm really at a disadvantage.
Posted by rjlockhart04-08 on January 16, 2012, at 22:05:31
In reply to Re: Are you a flake at work?, posted by sigismund on November 21, 2011, at 23:07:01
alot of those descriptions match some of my lack of communication skills at work. I HATE my character defects.
Matt
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