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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 13 of 13. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by fayeroe on July 10, 2008, at 16:54:17
that's it.
huge, huge and very public meltdown in Pdoc's reception area today.
Posted by TexasChic on July 10, 2008, at 20:38:09
In reply to I didn't ask to be bipolar, posted by fayeroe on July 10, 2008, at 16:54:17
Oh no! Those public ones are the worst! I certainly feel your pain. At least it was at the pdoc and not like, the grocery store or work or something! So what brought it on (if you want to talk about it)?
-T
Posted by fayeroe on July 10, 2008, at 20:57:07
In reply to Re: I didn't ask to be bipolar, posted by TexasChic on July 10, 2008, at 20:38:09
> Oh no! Those public ones are the worst! I certainly feel your pain. At least it was at the pdoc and not like, the grocery store or work or something! So what brought it on (if you want to talk about it)?
>
> -Tstarted while i was driving down there. 15 miles..KSGR was playing Bob Seger.....it just all hit me........
i almost scared the people in the waiting room to death. i kept saying, "i'm sorry, i'm so sorry" and it just got worse......no one in the reception "booth" acknowledged that i was carrying on like i was......i'm always the soul of whatever when i'm there......i didn't see the Pdoc, just the nurse for my meds......
i'm going to talk to you later. xoxox pat
Posted by obsidian on July 10, 2008, at 22:49:09
In reply to Re: I didn't ask to be bipolar » TexasChic, posted by fayeroe on July 10, 2008, at 20:57:07
I once cried for about an hour after hearing a couple of songs in a class I had in college
it wasn't pretty, it was the sobbing kind
and everytime I thought it stopped, it started againthe thing is, I had to leave the class, hide in the bathroom, and not come back until the whole thing was over and everyone had left
a couple of friends waited for me though. It was really a lot of fun (NOT) trying to explain why I was a hysterical mess.
f*ck*ng emotionsI'm not bipolar, but I do know what it's like to have emotions that are out of control
I'm sorry you're having a hard time
take good care of yourself
-sid
Posted by fayeroe on July 11, 2008, at 8:19:41
In reply to Re: I didn't ask to be bipolar » fayeroe, posted by obsidian on July 10, 2008, at 22:49:09
> I once cried for about an hour after hearing a couple of songs in a class I had in college
>
> it wasn't pretty, it was the sobbing kind
> and everytime I thought it stopped, it started again
>
> the thing is, I had to leave the class, hide in the bathroom, and not come back until the whole thing was over and everyone had left
> a couple of friends waited for me though. It was really a lot of fun (NOT) trying to explain why I was a hysterical mess.
> f*ck*ng emotions
>
> I'm not bipolar, but I do know what it's like to have emotions that are out of control
>
> I'm sorry you're having a hard time
> take good care of yourself
> -sid
some of it was situational in that the Pdoc's office messed up and i had to jump into truck and drive 15+miles down there to get stuff.Bob Seger started singing "The Final Scene" and about 50 years of living hit me and i was all over the map. past relationships, middle relationships, no relationship now, no money, no job (part-time one) and i am just totally sick of having my life turned upside down because i'm fr*gg*ng nuts.
moving to Texas is the best thing that i could have done for the "me" that needed to get out of the bible belt of Oklahoma, but the friend situation is so hopeless here. very small town...biggest industry is the prison and hell, i work there and i'd be better off making friends with a felon than i would be another employee....(corrupt and all that goes with it)
i didn't mean to just go off on this.....just got up and having my second cup of coffee and will go now and sit by fountain in yard and listen to birds.......xoxoxo pat
Posted by Phillipa on July 11, 2008, at 10:53:50
In reply to Re: I didn't ask to be bipolar » obsidian, posted by fayeroe on July 11, 2008, at 8:19:41
I wish I could cry. I seem to have no emotions other than fear and sleep till now not good. Even my pups avoid me why am I dying? Love Phillipa
Posted by Sigismund on July 11, 2008, at 18:46:42
In reply to Re: I didn't ask to be bipolar » obsidian, posted by fayeroe on July 11, 2008, at 8:19:41
So this is about time and how everything comes to ruin?
I dunno.
The best response to the world is heartbreak, and at the same time I can feel that it is a magical thing to be alive, because (as you know as you get older) it is not for very much longer.
Posted by fayeroe on July 11, 2008, at 19:37:48
In reply to Re: I didn't ask to be bipolar, posted by Sigismund on July 11, 2008, at 18:46:42
sometimes i get mired in the despair that i wasn't DXed earlier because i lost so many years...i mean i lost them....i know i was there but i don't remember why i was living.
it bothers me alot that i am getting older and i'm just now understanding bipolar. i've only been properly DXed two years.
i'll just throw the kitchen sink in....nothing pisses me off more than to hear a prison guard or administrative personnel refer to a pod being full of "bipolars".....or "he is in ad seg (solitary) because he is bipolar...or she is either bipolar or PMSing......someday i am going to jump right in the middle of the discussion and scream, "i'm f****** bipolar.....HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT, YOU MORONS??????
the crying was the sobbing and snot and blowing my nose and weeping and never did one patient, one nurse, one receptionist even glance my way....well, they probably stared when my head was between my legs and i was making so much noise....
the nurse was extremely distant when i went into her office to get the meds.
when it comes down to it, i guess we scare them.
(did i say that i ran out of gas coming home? i KNEW that i had to get gas in Luling....)
Posted by muffled on July 12, 2008, at 0:50:09
In reply to Re: I didn't ask to be bipolar » Sigismund, posted by fayeroe on July 11, 2008, at 19:37:48
(((((((((pat)))))))))
sorry its hard, your a wonderful person I've known here.
I'd like to kick the *ss*s of those stupid nurses.
I hope things settle down some, and I glad you know wassup and are dealing with it.
I feel I have wasted my life as well in so many ways.
I just hope you can feel better some soon cuz I allus like you.
M
Posted by nfc on July 12, 2008, at 8:47:51
In reply to I didn't ask to be bipolar, posted by fayeroe on July 10, 2008, at 16:54:17
Hey Pat,
sorry to hear of the ongoings. yeah I feel the same way. like i never asked to be a skitso either but sadly sh*t happens. as time went on and the depression lifted and psychotic symptoms improved I started to feel better again and I hope the same for you also. It's only recently too that my depression along w/ the insecurity and inferior feelings have begun to lift and its been a few years of feeling this way too.
yeah some people like in your docs office if they don't have the full understanding and compassion don't know how to react, understand and help those like us who have our emotions overwhelm us. guess we just gotta put up w/ them or try and make a difference by educating them. but educate w/ caution cuz letting people know your situation can change their viewpoint on you and possibly a number of other things as well.
but take care and hang in there. wishing the best for you,
nfc
Posted by fayeroe on July 12, 2008, at 8:52:42
In reply to Re: I didn't ask to be bipolar, posted by muffled on July 12, 2008, at 0:50:09
> (((((((((pat)))))))))
> sorry its hard, your a wonderful person I've known here.
> I'd like to kick the *ss*s of those stupid nurses.
> I hope things settle down some, and I glad you know wassup and are dealing with it.
> I feel I have wasted my life as well in so many ways.
> I just hope you can feel better some soon cuz I allus like you.
> M
muffled, the words that you posted to me means the world!!!!!!!!!! yesterday was pretty good.
you're my light in the tunnel of mental issue breakdowns.........
Posted by fayeroe on July 12, 2008, at 9:01:32
In reply to Re: I didn't ask to be bipolar » fayeroe, posted by nfc on July 12, 2008, at 8:47:51
when i said that i want to jump in the middle of the people at the prison...i really meant it. the teaching situation is a job that you have to really be sharp and on top of it at all times. that's why it would give me alot of satisfaction to just blow the lid off on what bipolar really is.
there are teachers there that will not agree to any sub except moi.
i wonder which would be more impressive, telling them that i'm bipolar or testing positive for an illegal drug? probably the bipolar. :-)
thank you so much for your kind words. i just keep my mouth shut and really don't tell people that i'm BP.
Posted by Kath on July 12, 2008, at 21:16:39
In reply to I didn't ask to be bipolar, posted by fayeroe on July 10, 2008, at 16:54:17
(((((((((((((((((((((((((you)))))))))))))))))))))
You are such a wonderful person. I hate to know you're in pain. I'm sorry. Am sending you loving thoughts, for what it's worth.
luv, Kath
This is the end of the thread.
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