![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 13 of 13. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Deneb on March 25, 2007, at 19:35:34
I feel sort of bad. Someone is still ignoring me and it's been a really long time. I wish we could be friends again. I just don't understand.
I also feel sort of ignored in chat sometimes.
I'm trying to be good, but what if being good doesn't give me enough attention?
I dunno. I feel sort of lonely. I'm selfish. I wish I didn't need so much attention.
Geez, I'm getting sad, feeling sorry for myself. I'm gonna cry a bit.
I'm immature.
((((((((Iwillsurvive))))))))) she tells me I'm doing good and I like that.
Deneb*
Posted by Deneb on March 25, 2007, at 19:55:06
In reply to Feeling needy again, posted by Deneb on March 25, 2007, at 19:35:34
I need a million virtual hugs.
((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Deneb)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
I support people in chat sometimes, usually one on one. Shouldn't it be enough to support others?
I'm selfish. I want to be acknowledged.
I need some gold stars. Good job Deneb! Way to go!
It's bad of me, but sometimes I just want lots and lots of Babblers to give me virtual hugs to show me they care. I want hundreds of Babblers to give me virtual hugs.
Deneb*
Posted by karen_kay on March 25, 2007, at 21:17:17
In reply to Re: Feeling needy again, posted by Deneb on March 25, 2007, at 19:55:06
Posted by fayeroe on March 25, 2007, at 21:18:37
In reply to Re: Feeling needy again, posted by Deneb on March 25, 2007, at 19:55:06
> I need a million virtual hugs.
>
> ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Deneb)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
>
> I support people in chat sometimes, usually one on one. Shouldn't it be enough to support others?
>
> I'm selfish. I want to be acknowledged.
>
> I need some gold stars. Good job Deneb! Way to go!
>
> It's bad of me, but sometimes I just want lots and lots of Babblers to give me virtual hugs to show me they care. I want hundreds of Babblers to give me virtual hugs.
>
> Deneb*deneb, in my life i've found that some people like me and some don't. if that was going to define me as a person, i'd be in one helluva mess. i define me. i am who i am.
i fear that your patterns of the past are rising again and i really hate that. think about it, do you really want someone to like you just because you think they don't? what is there to gain from that?
people like us for different reasons.......hardly ever because we want them to.........i'm afraid i'm out of thoughts on your dilemna..........take care, pat
Posted by scratchpad on March 25, 2007, at 21:24:35
In reply to Re: Feeling needy again, posted by Deneb on March 25, 2007, at 19:55:06
I'm sorry that you had to ask. I have a pretty good hug-deficiency detector!!!
sp
Posted by Racer on March 25, 2007, at 21:33:43
In reply to Re: Feeling needy again » Deneb, posted by fayeroe on March 25, 2007, at 21:18:37
I don't know about your old patterns showing on this one, actually. It looks to me as though you're being pretty direct in asking for what you need right now -- and that's a GOOD THING. That's the way it's supposed to work -- use your voice to express your needs or wants.
They still may not be met, of course. Kinda like Westly says in "The Princess Bride" -- "Get used to disappointment." (I have a good friend who quotes that movie a lot. It's a great movie.)
As Fayroe says, people like us for different reasons, and you can't force it. And you'll never know why, really. I think I have a pretty good idea of why my husband liked me, but he's pretty clueless about what I saw in him. My best friend in college was about as unlike me as it was possible to be -- and we're still friends 20 some years later. And there are people who just don't like me, too. I've met people I really wanted to have like me, but they didn't. I can't tell you why, but I can tell you that I've finally figured out that there's nothing I can do about it.
Except waste time and energy worrying about it...
Posted by Deneb on March 25, 2007, at 21:43:38
In reply to Re: Feeling needy again, posted by Racer on March 25, 2007, at 21:33:43
Thanks for replying. :-)
I was actually going to post that I felt better when I saw the responses. I dunno, I just get a little sad sometimes. I'm learning to deal with it.
(((((((((((((((You guys))))))))))))))))
I just love you. You care or else you won't reply to me. Thanks for caring. :-)
I should focus on the good things.
I shouldn't need everyone to like me.
Aw. Now I feel all loved. Thanks guys. :-)
Deneb*
Posted by Deneb on March 26, 2007, at 0:56:36
In reply to Re: Feeling needy again, posted by Deneb on March 25, 2007, at 21:43:38
This need for attention for myself, I really should learn to give it to myself. I need to learn to make myself feel good and not rely on others so much.
I'm trying. I'm learning I hope.
Thanks karen kay, for the hug. (((((((((Karen Kay))))))))))
Fayeroe, thanks for giving me advice.
((((((((Scratchpad))))))))))
Racer, thanks for noticing when I do the right things.
Deneb*
Posted by Dinah on March 26, 2007, at 9:11:26
In reply to Feeling needy again, posted by Deneb on March 25, 2007, at 19:35:34
You *are* doing good. You're doing good right now by asking for what you need.
I'm sorry if I make you feel ignored in chat sometimes. I'd never ever wish to do that on purpose. I'm glad you join us there, and I'm so proud of you for all the work you've done.
In fact, I've been meaning to ask if you and Honore are still doing the DBT in chat, and if you have set schedules for it. I'm still really interested in doing that.
Posted by Dinah on March 26, 2007, at 9:13:10
In reply to Feeling needy again, posted by Deneb on March 25, 2007, at 19:35:34
I forgot the hug. :)
Posted by Larry Hoover on March 26, 2007, at 9:26:49
In reply to Re: Feeling needy again, posted by Deneb on March 26, 2007, at 0:56:36
> This need for attention for myself, I really should learn to give it to myself. I need to learn to make myself feel good and not rely on others so much.
>
> I'm trying. I'm learning I hope.Yes, you are. Learning is from doing, not from thinking about doing.
When a similar feeling arises in the future, I hope you recall this thread and your post timelines. Your distress was very brief and transient. In the past, your distress would sometimes lock in. This time, you let it go. You did things that promoted release and relief. Congrats!
Lar
Posted by Phillipa on March 26, 2007, at 12:27:59
In reply to Re: Feeling needy again » Deneb, posted by Larry Hoover on March 26, 2007, at 9:26:49
Hey Deneb teach he how? Love Phillipa
Posted by fayeroe on March 26, 2007, at 17:34:06
In reply to Re: Feeling needy again » Deneb, posted by Larry Hoover on March 26, 2007, at 9:26:49
> > This need for attention for myself, I really should learn to give it to myself. I need to learn to make myself feel good and not rely on others so much.
> >
> > I'm trying. I'm learning I hope.
>
> Yes, you are. Learning is from doing, not from thinking about doing.
>
> When a similar feeling arises in the future, I hope you recall this thread and your post timelines. Your distress was very brief and transient. In the past, your distress would sometimes lock in. This time, you let it go. You did things that promoted release and relief. Congrats!
>
> Lari agree!
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Social | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.