Shown: posts 1 to 21 of 21. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by wildcard11 on March 17, 2006, at 17:20:19
called my 'father' today and got told what a disappointment i was and failure...even at 29 with years of not speaking to him at a time i always think one day will be different. for those 5 minutes, why can't he just not put me down?? i am just really hurt.
Posted by sleepygirl on March 17, 2006, at 17:34:04
In reply to hurt, posted by wildcard11 on March 17, 2006, at 17:20:19
(((((wildcard))))))
oh sweetheart, I am so sorry
sounds like he doesn't have much of a clue
I guess "hurt" says it all huh?
...maybe you hope he has just a tiny bit of the compassion you are gifted with
he sounds like the "disappointing" one to me :-(
Posted by Gabbix2 on March 17, 2006, at 18:54:11
In reply to hurt, posted by wildcard11 on March 17, 2006, at 17:20:19
Aww wildcard, I'm sorry.
That can be so crushing, and yet you always have the childlike hope that it will be different.
I think many posters here, get the same type of treatment.
It just sucks((((WC))))
Posted by LegWarmers on March 17, 2006, at 19:16:51
In reply to hurt, posted by wildcard11 on March 17, 2006, at 17:20:19
aw wildcard Im sorry. That hurts so much.
(((wildcard)))
Posted by fairywings on March 17, 2006, at 20:22:16
In reply to hurt, posted by wildcard11 on March 17, 2006, at 17:20:19
I can't imagine how awful that would feel, I'm so sorry he couldn't just be happy about the call.fw
Posted by Deneb on March 17, 2006, at 20:30:35
In reply to hurt, posted by wildcard11 on March 17, 2006, at 17:20:19
Maybe he's just one of those people who just don't "get it".
You deserve much better.
(((((wildcard)))))
Deneb*
Posted by agent858 on March 17, 2006, at 20:35:33
In reply to hurt, posted by wildcard11 on March 17, 2006, at 17:20:19
(((((wildcard)))))
one of the nicest sweetest people i've met.
i'm sorry he can't see the you that we see :-(
but you know it really is his loss.
he must be a really very unhappy person indeed.
we care about you
are glad you are here
:-)
((((((wildcard)))))
i'm sorry you are hurting
if you lived over here...
i'd take you for icecream and we could go watch the sailboats on the lake.
Posted by Phillipa on March 17, 2006, at 21:05:47
In reply to Re: hurt, posted by agent858 on March 17, 2006, at 20:35:33
Wildcard come over and plant pansies with me tomorrow or we can ride to the Mountains if Greg will. Sorry he's like that. He will learn. Love Jan
Posted by Dinah on March 17, 2006, at 21:43:55
In reply to hurt, posted by wildcard11 on March 17, 2006, at 17:20:19
I'm really sorry. It's hard to let go of that hope that this time things will be different. I'm so sorry that you didn't get the sort of father that every child deserves.
Posted by wildcard11 on March 18, 2006, at 13:52:17
In reply to Re: hurt » wildcard11, posted by Dinah on March 17, 2006, at 21:43:55
that i will take his negative words and use them for motivation. he adopted his wife's 2 girls and they lead a very privileged life. well scr*w him if i don't own up to his standards. where was he when we had no food, clothing, roof over our heads, a Christmas tree or present?! Where was he when our step dad got drunk and beat the hell out of us w/ boat oars and baseball bats? where was he when i quit school w/ a 6th grade education and passed my GED w/ honors. where was he when i got into college being a single mom or worked 2 jobs to pay for non cosmetic braces. and i care what he thinks~not today!!!
Posted by sleepygirl on March 18, 2006, at 21:26:11
In reply to It takes a real man to be a FATHER *trigger*, posted by wildcard11 on March 18, 2006, at 13:52:17
YEAH!!....and don't forget for a second how great you are
Posted by Tanzanite on March 19, 2006, at 0:16:53
In reply to hurt, posted by wildcard11 on March 17, 2006, at 17:20:19
I am so sorry. That has to be painful. I don't know what else to say except I care about you and so do other people here. I hope you feel better soon
Chelle
Posted by ClearSkies on March 19, 2006, at 7:08:53
In reply to It takes a real man to be a FATHER *trigger*, posted by wildcard11 on March 18, 2006, at 13:52:17
I don't really know what to say except that your father has no idea what a wonderful daughter he has discarded from his life.
(((Wildcard)))
CS
Posted by fairywings on March 19, 2006, at 8:50:09
In reply to (((Wildcard))), posted by ClearSkies on March 19, 2006, at 7:08:53
I guess we'll never understand how someone who was supposed to love us and protect us, could abandon us and hurt us so badly over and over and over. ((((wildcad))))I'm so sorry.
fw
Posted by wildcard11 on March 19, 2006, at 11:03:07
In reply to Re: (((Wildcard))), posted by fairywings on March 19, 2006, at 8:50:09
but i'm better now. it will probably always hurt not having a mom or dad but i am proud of who i am today regardless. tears cleanse the soul.
Posted by wildcard11 on March 19, 2006, at 11:04:27
In reply to Re: (((Wildcard))), posted by fairywings on March 19, 2006, at 8:50:09
for your support and understanding...it meant the world these past few days. okay, i'm getting teary eyed again...love ya'll
Posted by milly on March 19, 2006, at 13:03:51
In reply to That's exactly it » fairywings, posted by wildcard11 on March 19, 2006, at 11:03:07
...you are no disappointment, you are no failure.
It hurts like hell when we always think 'this time it will be different' and it just isn't.
We can't change others sadly but really it is HIM who is the disappointment and the failure, NOT YOU.
((((wildcard11)))))))))
Posted by Phillipa on March 19, 2006, at 18:01:51
In reply to Re: That's exactly it, posted by milly on March 19, 2006, at 13:03:51
Milly's right!!!!!! Fondly, Phillipa
Posted by fairywings on March 19, 2006, at 19:52:41
In reply to Thank you everyone, posted by wildcard11 on March 19, 2006, at 11:04:27
Hi wildcard,
Milly really hit on something for me. My dad was also abusive, but when he was dying he was sad, lonely, and maybe paranoid.
I think milly's right, the person abusing is the dissappointment, and I think the person they hate the most is themselves. Unfortunately, they can damage a lot of people in the process.I'm so sorry you were hurt, but I'm glad you've found support on babble, and I'm glad you're such an incredible person.
(((wildcard)))
fw
Posted by lynn971 on March 19, 2006, at 21:43:05
In reply to hurt, posted by wildcard11 on March 17, 2006, at 17:20:19
Oh Wildcard,
I am so sorry your dad did that to you. I am very proud of who you are. I dont know if I could have gone through the things that you have had to endure.
love ya,
Lynn
Posted by Phillipa on March 20, 2006, at 0:07:01
In reply to Re: hurt, posted by lynn971 on March 19, 2006, at 21:43:05
Lynn you're home. Love Phillipa
This is the end of the thread.
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