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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 3 to 27 of 27. Go back in thread:
Posted by annierose on August 18, 2005, at 7:21:15
In reply to Tired of Being the Office Crazy Person, posted by Poet on August 17, 2005, at 0:07:01
Poet -
Sorry that you are having such a crummy time at work. And as hard as it might be, I wouldn't worry about what other people are thinking or saying, shame on them.One woman I worked with opened up to me about some difficulties she was going through. I did keep the info to myself. But my attitude did shift and I was able more protective of her thereafter. For example, if someone snipped, "what's up with her lately?". I could reply, "everyone has bad days, what don't you just leave her alone or be more supportive?" ... something like that. Do you have any allies at work?
Speaking of work, I'm late, gotta go, but thinking of you. Take one day at a time.
Annierose
Posted by cricket on August 18, 2005, at 7:21:15
In reply to Tired of Being the Office Crazy Person, posted by Poet on August 17, 2005, at 0:07:01
Yeah, lately I'm the office crazy person too.
People tiptoe around me. I never show up for meetings and then sometimes I get someone timidly knocking on my door and very hesitantly sticking their head in and asking if they can ask me some questions.
I hope it gets better Poet. I hope you find a job where you can use your talents. Or at the very least get a little privacy. It's hard to imagine surviving at my job without being able to shut my door and hide.
Posted by Dinah on August 18, 2005, at 7:21:15
In reply to Tired of Being the Office Crazy Person, posted by Poet on August 17, 2005, at 0:07:01
I'm tired of being the office screwup. Just like the home screwup.
I miss feeling competent.
Posted by B2chica on August 18, 2005, at 7:21:15
In reply to ((((Poet)))), posted by Dinah on August 17, 2005, at 9:21:09
i miss feeling competent too. sometimes i wonder if my brain will ever be 100% again...
(((((((poet)))))))))
i know its easy to say and not easy to do but to h@ll with those rude co-workers. most are just nosey and want to gossip anyway. someone else mentioned finding something you really enjoy or that challenges you and do this after work, that's a good idea. also, make sure you take your allotted breaks and lunch time- go for a walk (or a cry) whatever the heck you feel like doing at these times.so sorry you are going through this. with all the crying, are you on any AD? have you talked to your doc about this? i used to cry for no reason, heck at work i'd open a wrong file and start crying it was terrible, but i'm on different AD and higher dosage and really seems to work.
if AD are not the answer i like the idea of writing down how and what you are feeling maybe you can show T and maybe just writing it will help.
Best wishes
b2c.
Posted by Dinah on August 18, 2005, at 7:21:15
In reply to Re: ((((Poet)))), posted by B2chica on August 17, 2005, at 11:25:32
Yeah, I've been thinking about it the last few days and I've realized that the only times I've felt undepressed lately was when I had demonstrated competence in some way.
Maybe it's way too important to me.
Posted by Shortelise on August 18, 2005, at 7:21:15
In reply to Tired of Being the Office Crazy Person, posted by Poet on August 17, 2005, at 0:07:01
Yupo, that sucks.
Is there a bright side? I mean, if they already think you're nuts, you can relax, right? No need to keep up a facade like they're all doing. Everyone is every bit as crazy as you and I are, Poet. Everyone, bar none. Maybe they just don't know it, or accept it, or ignore it, or hide it better. I don't know.
But it's ok to be nuts. I've been nuts all my life. But wait, I think I've been working on that in therapy --- yes! I remember now. Sometimes I have been the only sane person in an insane place. Ha!
((((Poet)))) if we worked together, even at a sh*t job, I'd be on your side. I'd say, she's not crazy, she's deep, and I'd smile mysteriously.
ShortE
Posted by AdaGrace on August 18, 2005, at 8:38:44
In reply to Tired of Being the Office Crazy Person, posted by Poet on August 17, 2005, at 0:07:01
My job situation is different from yours in a lot of ways, but yet similar in that I cannot seem to stop bursting into tears. This job is killing me, literally. My depression is off the charts, my blood pressure is high, I eat junk food all the time now so I've gained a lot of weight, and because it is so crappy here, I go home and scream at my kids at night.
This is how I have survived. I do crossword puzzles on break and lunch. I know it sounds trivial, but it is helping some.
I used to call my friends on break or listen to music, but doing the crossword puzzles in my car seems to give me a few minutes of peace.
Interestingly enough, when I was saner, I could finish the one from the paper during my 30 minute lunch. Now I can't seem to get half finished, so maybe it's not working. H*ll I don't know. Guess I'm no help.Just wanted you to now that I get that, "is she okay" stuff too. I know how it feels.
Posted by Thomasin on August 18, 2005, at 8:39:50
In reply to Tired of Being the Office Crazy Person, posted by Poet on August 17, 2005, at 0:07:01
Hi Poet,
I wrote back to you on my last post. We have so much in common.(actually I'm begining to feel all of you people are soulmates and on the same page-us being smart, witty people w/ less ability to tow that party line and be "normal")Unemployeed now and having interveiws later I haven't had the opportunity to burst into tears at work lately but, I have really had some fun little breakdowns in the past.
When I first started as a vet tech, I got literally hysterical every time I was bit or scratched. I'd have to run to the bathroom for what seemed like hours til I calmed down.( you know when you're feeling like you're winding down and about ready to face the world and you look at oh, the toliet paper and that reminds you you're out at home which seems insermountable and makes you feel like such a total failure and that makes you completely hysterical all over again and then it's another like hour before you emerge with your red,swollen eyes and everyone knows, so you think,etc,etc,blah,blah,blah)Most jobs lately haven't been quite as bad although a few months ago, at my underpaid, mindless retail job I did have a classic breakdown/nosebleed event that was quite festive. I scare people sometimes, I just know it.
Anyway the point of this epic diatribe/epic is you are abolutely not alone and when people at work ask you stupid questions and think you are crazy perhaps it is time to give them stupid, crazy answers.
"Are you ok?"
"no, I'M NOT."high pitched hysterical giggling"the people in my head are telling me I forgot to feed the goldfish and I...DON'T...HAVE...ANY..GOLDFISH!!!"Maybe some quiet sobbing as you hum The Ants Go Marching and skip down the hall, glancing back to see your co-workers perplexed and frightened face...
Sometimes humor which sometimes only I think is funny is my only salvation. Cheers! T
Posted by Poet on August 18, 2005, at 18:16:42
In reply to Re: (((((Poet))))), posted by All Done on August 17, 2005, at 2:03:08
Hi Laurie,
I do hide in my car at lunch. I try to distract myself with reading. My concentration sucks, so it doesn't distract me for very long.
I wish I could find something outside of work to challenge me- help me realize that a job isn't my entire life. I've been working on this in therapy for three years, you'd think I'd get it by now. Sigh.
Thanks for the gentle hugs and understanding.
Poet
Posted by Poet on August 18, 2005, at 18:29:15
In reply to Re: Tired of Being the Office Crazy Person » Poet, posted by annierose on August 17, 2005, at 7:38:22
Hi Annierose,
I always worry about what people are thinking about me. I know it's projecting. Three years in therapy and I am still struggling with why I started therapy.
There are people who are nice to me, but I don't feel comfortable sharing anything about my emotional issues. One woman told me she's on meds for anxiety and I said "I can identify" but that's it. Her daughter works there, too and she tells her daughter everything, so my secret would be spread.
Thanks for thinking of me.
Poet
Posted by Poet on August 18, 2005, at 18:32:51
In reply to Re: Tired of Being the Office Crazy Person » Poet, posted by cricket on August 17, 2005, at 8:05:24
Hi Cricket,
I so need a door- one that locks.
Why isn't there a job just for the office crazy people? We'd get along so well.
I hope that nobody knocks on your door and leaves you in peace all day at work.
Poet
Posted by Poet on August 18, 2005, at 18:37:20
In reply to ((((Poet)))), posted by Dinah on August 17, 2005, at 9:21:09
Hi Dinah,
I long ago forget anything I might have been competent in.
I'll think hard when my brain is capable of thinking straight. Which it has never been.
Thanks for your, unfortunate, understanding.
Poet
Posted by Poet on August 18, 2005, at 18:41:59
In reply to Re: ((((Poet)))), posted by B2chica on August 17, 2005, at 11:25:32
Hi B2chica,
I am on an AD- new pdoc increased it three weeks ago. I see her next week for meds management. I am beginning to think that her suggestion of a little bit of an antipsychotic might be worth trying. This crying has to stop. I hate crying.
My T keeps telling me it's okay to call her when I break down, but she's not always there. I can try writing what I am feeling, I could maybe read it to her when she calls me back.
Thanks for caring. Hope things are better with you.
Poet
Posted by Poet on August 18, 2005, at 18:43:02
In reply to Re: ((((Poet)))), posted by Poet on August 18, 2005, at 18:41:59
Posted by Poet on August 18, 2005, at 18:48:33
In reply to Re: Tired of Being the Office Crazy Person » Poet, posted by Shortelise on August 18, 2005, at 0:46:43
Hi ShortE,
Thank you for thinking that I am deep and not deeply disturbed.
You are right that everybody is crazy in some way whether they admit it or not. At least we admit it and try to get help for it. Though maybe that means we're not crazy?
I would gladly work with you anytime.
Poet
Posted by Poet on August 18, 2005, at 18:56:32
In reply to Re: Tired of Being the Office Crazy Person » Poet, posted by AdaGrace on August 18, 2005, at 8:38:44
Hi AdaGrace,
I am sorry for why you *get it* but am grateful that you do. I am trying to read on my lunch hour, but my concentration right now sucks. I keep rereading the same page. I like crossword puzzles, but would probably get stuck something like *Edgar Allen Poe was a POE_?* Poer? Poek?
Sorry your job is killing you, you deserve to be stress free.
Poet
Posted by Poet on August 18, 2005, at 18:59:11
In reply to Re: Tired of Being the Office Crazy Person » AdaGrace, posted by Poet on August 18, 2005, at 18:56:32
Posted by Poet on August 18, 2005, at 19:18:23
In reply to Re: Tired of Being the Office Crazy Person, posted by Thomasin on August 18, 2005, at 8:39:50
Hi Thomasin,
I think my most spectacular meltdown was at an interview for a temp to hire job. (BTW- it was for a different division of my current employer. Which is the only reason I can laugh about it.)
I was given a computer test and I couldn't handle it. I freaked out, wrote a rambling word document that I am leaving, burst into tears and ran. With the interviewer trailing after me asking what's wrong.
I think the only way I got crappy temp job that lead to crappy perm job is that I just had to show up. No interview.
I think humor that only we think is funny is the best kind. How's this for *are you okay?* *no thanks, I'm not hungry.* Or *why doe you want to know my shoe size, that's kind of personal.*
Thanks for making me laugh. I so need, too. Post or babblemail me your career woes, I can identify and laugh with you.
Poet
Posted by Phillipa on August 18, 2005, at 21:14:57
In reply to Re: Tired of Being the Office Crazy Person » Thomasin, posted by Poet on August 18, 2005, at 19:18:23
Hi Poet, No reason to feel bad. When I was working as a psych RN most of the staff was on an AD or antianxiety med. Some were even recovering addicts. So don't feel bad everyone has problems. the more that you talk to those you feel you can trust they will open up and the next thing you know will be that you are not alone and others feel the same way and are also on meds. Sorry to break in on old friends. Fondly, Phillipa
Posted by Thomasin on August 19, 2005, at 8:35:37
In reply to Re: Tired of Being the Office Crazy Person » Thomasin, posted by Poet on August 18, 2005, at 19:18:23
Hi,
My mother is sort of one of us as well. She worked for a huge bank many years ago and even had prefered stalls in the bathroom for hysterics.
She scored a dismal 17 wpm on a temp agency typing test. I beat her w/ a score of 9 wpm so, I know that ole typing test feeling...Babblemailed you also but am reseting my password cuz, well, I'm lame and forgot it so might be awhile til I get back to you...
Posted by octopusprime on August 19, 2005, at 19:43:38
In reply to Re: Tired of Being the Office Crazy Person, posted by Thomasin on August 19, 2005, at 8:35:37
I have got in trouble at work for some of my outbursts.
One time, a meeting was running overtime and going off-topic. I had lost my patience. I stood up and walked out of the meeting. (Probably with some snarky remark). The meeting organizer then complained about me to my boss.
I get mad, I raise my voice. Everybody has to tell me to quiet down. I will not quiet down, I say. I don't care who hears me.
We keep a beer fridge in co-worker's office. We have had weeks where every day we go in there at five and shut the door and talk about how unmotivated we are and how demoralized we are and then complain about our coworkers.
On the bright side, I think I'm positioned for a good review. On the con side, everybody is scared of me and people avoid taking up problems with me directly.
Posted by Poet on August 20, 2005, at 11:38:58
In reply to Breaking In On established friendship, posted by Phillipa on August 18, 2005, at 21:14:57
Hi Phillipa,
You didn't break in on old friends, please don't apologize.
It's not easy for me to open up to anybody (see history of not talking to T on psych board. Then again don't, boring, boring, boring.) Everyone does have problems and the people in the office are no different.
Thanks for posting your insight and experience, it helps me to know that others understand what I am going through.
Poet
Posted by Poet on August 20, 2005, at 11:44:30
In reply to on storming out of meetings and hurting feeeelings, posted by octopusprime on August 19, 2005, at 19:43:38
Hi Octopusprime,
I've stormed out of meetings. I've fallen asleep during meetings. I got critisized more for sleeping, so maybe walking out is less frowned upon? I don't know.
I hate reviews- I don't remember what a positive one looks like. I hope yours is good. I don't know why everybody is scared of you, I wouldn't be. Have a beer or three for me. I wish my office had that fridge for after five. Though I'd probably be alone in there- that's okay, I love to be alone.
Thanks.
Poet
Posted by Poet on August 20, 2005, at 11:44:49
In reply to on storming out of meetings and hurting feeeelings, posted by octopusprime on August 19, 2005, at 19:43:38
Hi Octopusprime,
I've stormed out of meetings. I've fallen asleep during meetings. I got critisized more for sleeping, so maybe walking out is less frowned upon? I don't know.
I hate reviews- I don't remember what a positive one looks like. I hope yours is good. I don't know why everybody is scared of you, I wouldn't be. Have a beer or three for me. I wish my office had that fridge for after five. Though I'd probably be alone in there- that's okay, I love to be alone.
Thanks.
Poet
Posted by AdaGrace on August 22, 2005, at 9:11:17
In reply to Re: Tired of Being the Office Crazy Person » AdaGrace, posted by Poet on August 18, 2005, at 18:56:32
After I posted that thing about how I could't do the puzzles all the way through anymore, and thinking it was my mental unstability........
I couldn't find the current local paper. I searched through the stack in the back room and grabbed the FYI section of the paper from March.
I WAS ABLE TO FILL THAT ONE OUT!!!!
SO,
I have determined that I haven't become more stupid, its a conspiracy thought up by the paper people to lure people in, but publishing easy crossword puzzles to get them hooked, and the slowly increase the difficulty, just to slap us down........
This is the end of the thread.
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