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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 20 of 20. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by minarose on February 16, 2005, at 13:28:35
hello my name is minarose i am 26 years old and i am new to the group, i was diagonised with angoria phobia,and also major deppresent all with in the last year... i was married and lost my husband in a car acciendt.. my son is austic and i am trying to care for him the best i can i fell like i am on a rnaway train.. i want to understand some of these issues and how i can help my self please... i would like to talk to some one.. thankyou'
minarose
Posted by sunny10 on February 16, 2005, at 13:49:29
In reply to i am confused and want advice,, posted by minarose on February 16, 2005, at 13:28:35
I hate to sound ignorant, but what is angoria phobia?
Even without that disorder, it sounds like you have been having a tough time lately, I'm sorry.
Besides being given the names of your disorders, are you on any medicatons? Are you seeing a therapist?
I'll help in any way I can think of...
-sunny10
Posted by Angielala on February 16, 2005, at 13:51:03
In reply to i am confused and want advice,, posted by minarose on February 16, 2005, at 13:28:35
Welcome Minarose!
You'll find a lot of caring ears here... and you'll also find a lot of good advice.
I'm so sorry to hear about your husband.
How old is your son? I had the pleasure of working with an autistic group oif children about 6-7 years ago. I fell in love with each and everyone of them. I also know the challenges that come along with that love... and I was just their teacher.
What's on your mind?
> hello my name is minarose i am 26 years old and i am new to the group, i was diagonised with angoria phobia,and also major deppresent all with in the last year... i was married and lost my husband in a car acciendt.. my son is austic and i am trying to care for him the best i can i fell like i am on a rnaway train.. i want to understand some of these issues and how i can help my self please... i would like to talk to some one.. thankyou'
> minarose
Posted by Toph on February 16, 2005, at 13:51:40
In reply to i am confused and want advice,, posted by minarose on February 16, 2005, at 13:28:35
With all of the trauma you have had to endure with your loss and the responsibilites of your son's condition, it may be that either or both of your depression or agoraphobia is situational, normal stress reactions to real problems as opposed to biochemical ones. Either way I hope you are seeking professional help. Hopefully the school system can provide some relief during the day by working with your son.
I think you will find people here to be empathic and supportive. Welcome and I hope you stay around for a while.
Toph
Posted by minarose on February 16, 2005, at 14:19:12
In reply to Re: i am confused and want advice,, posted by Angielala on February 16, 2005, at 13:51:03
hello, my son is four years old, i guess you could say i just want to find a way to deal with my own issues so it dosent effect my parenting issues.
Posted by minarose on February 16, 2005, at 14:24:01
In reply to Greetings » minarose, posted by Toph on February 16, 2005, at 13:51:40
dear troph:
well, i have never sat down and thought about it this way, about the situational thing i really dont know muhc about my child hood i really had a bad one and block form the age 15 on down i dont rember. i look froward to talkting to you and others
minarose
Posted by minarose on February 16, 2005, at 14:48:38
In reply to Re: i am confused and want advice,, posted by minarose on February 16, 2005, at 14:19:12
hello, again i am also needing adivce on another topiic as i not sure how to use the message bord and others areas, i have my som that is austic, that is four and i also have my nephew that is 14 he just became homeless and his mom left him on his birthday, for the boyfirned that was abusing him he has alot of aggresoion and he dosenot want my four year old, to be around him. and my four yearlold looks up to him as a big brother.. also he has called child protection on his mother.. and has flat out told her that he dosent want to be with her. he wants to be with my and and my son.
he starts day treament. tommrow, and he is either biplor witht anxity, or he is anxity, and sczchariphrina, i am totaly cluesless on how i should help him. the mom is wanting him with her
and he is saying mo.
thanks
minarose
Posted by partlycloudy on February 16, 2005, at 15:12:32
In reply to Re: i am confused and want advice,, posted by minarose on February 16, 2005, at 14:48:38
Hi, Minarose, and welcome to babble. There is a board here called "Parents" which might be a good place to start.
Reaching out for help is the hardest part, I think. It's nice to meet you.
Posted by sunny10 on February 16, 2005, at 15:14:24
In reply to Re: i am confused and want advice,, posted by minarose on February 16, 2005, at 14:48:38
Where he will live sounds like a situation that child services will make, as he has already called them. Have you spoken to any of their caseworkers? I'm sure Toph will be ble to fill you in as far as what kinds of things you can expect from them.
Also sounds like you will have resources and get useful information from the day treatment center.
If you have experienced abuse of any kind (which it sounds like is possible- either of the sexual, physical or emotional types of abuse), it is normal for the mind to "refuse to remember" it. I, too, have only about three memories of childhood within my own home. I have managed to recall things that occurred outside of my home, but am still struggling with the memories that came with familial relationship issues.
I realize that all of this stuff happening at once feels extremely overwhelming to you. Please keep in mind, though, that you are also at a point where you can actually start clearing up a lot of these issues with the outside resources that you have in place now.
You have a diagnosis and can now get the kind of help YOU need, your nephew is getting help from the day center and child services, and your wonderful son can only benefit by the help that you and your nephew are receiving.
It is becoming a winning situation, believe it or not.
You have gotten this far (which is difficult). I truly believe that things will get better for you.
Please keep us posted, and Toph, if you're reading, will you offer some insight into the children's services part?
-sunny10
Posted by Toph on February 16, 2005, at 15:34:46
In reply to Re: i am confused and want advice,, posted by sunny10 on February 16, 2005, at 15:14:24
Not sure what you mean by child services, sunny. Child Protecrtion Services attmpts to protect children from a bad situation, though not always effectively and that does not appear to be the situation here. This boy may benefit from pre-school programs. At some age the school district is compelled to provide specialized educational services for all special needs children in the community. Some places have a birth to 3 program, and if I'm not mistaken age 4 is the age that special education can start. You need to call the superintendent's office of your school district. It just sounds to me like minarose needs as much support right now as she can get.
Toph
Posted by TamaraJ on February 16, 2005, at 16:18:46
In reply to Re: i am confused » sunny10, posted by Toph on February 16, 2005, at 15:34:46
Sorry Toph, I don't mean to speak for Sunny, but I think she was referring questions minarose has with respect to her 14 year old nephew whose mother left him to go live with her boyfriend (who had been abusing the boy) and now wants him back. He does not want to live with her, and has called Child Services.
Anyway, sorry for being a buttinski (especially to Sunny).
Tamara
> Not sure what you mean by child services, sunny. Child Protecrtion Services attmpts to protect children from a bad situation, though not always effectively and that does not appear to be the situation here. This boy may benefit from pre-school programs. At some age the school district is compelled to provide specialized educational services for all special needs children in the community. Some places have a birth to 3 program, and if I'm not mistaken age 4 is the age that special education can start. You need to call the superintendent's office of your school district. It just sounds to me like minarose needs as much support right now as she can get.
>
> Toph
Posted by minarose on February 16, 2005, at 20:38:35
In reply to Re: i am confused and want advice,, posted by sunny10 on February 16, 2005, at 15:14:24
as far as the sexual abuse goes i was sexualy molested by my step father abujsed me, and at the age of two, my mother kidnaped me form my father and she was doing cocaine and other drugs, during this time, she was really partying it up, i wanted a mother figure so bad, my father some how got custody of me, and the rest of my life is a blurr i dont rember, i was also wondering if you could tell me what i could do to to stop blackouts,
about my 14 year old nephew, yes i am involved with his workers and he has help, but he is very bitter towards to my son the one who is austic and my som is becoming angered, by this, as my son as well has workers i am trying to helpp my self as well as them...
minarose
Posted by minarose on February 17, 2005, at 10:00:06
In reply to Re: i am confused and want advice,, posted by sunny10 on February 16, 2005, at 15:14:24
hello, i have another question, last night my four year old son lashed out at me and started hitting me and punching me, and i knwo there are anger issues here, because of my nephew being here but what can i do with this situation i am open to any ideas, thanks again they both are very tertoial,
minarose
Posted by Toph on February 17, 2005, at 10:44:59
In reply to Re: i am confused » Toph, posted by TamaraJ on February 16, 2005, at 16:18:46
Posted by sunny10 on February 17, 2005, at 13:12:57
In reply to Re: i am confused and want advice,, posted by minarose on February 17, 2005, at 10:00:06
I don't know much about autism and dealing with "discipline issues", such as "no hitting, no kicking, no biting, etc.", but you should be able to get some help through your county offices. If I remember correctly, autism is on the list of "disorders" that the states consider "mental health disability".
If I recall, I made the call (my son had suspected ADHD, and I was unable to pay for the pyschiatrist, the therapist, et cetera) and had to answer questions over the phone. I then received lots of paperwork to fill out and sent it in. When it was received, I got a call to make an appointment to bring my son in for an evaluation. The end result of this long process is that my son had health insurance supplied by the state of Pennsylvania, he had wrap-around services to accompany him to daycare and kindergarten the following year, and we had a bit more peace of mind. In case you aren't familiar with the term, wrap-around services is used to provide all day therapy. It is emotionally supportive to the child and physically unobtrusive unless the child needs to be removed from the situation to deal with a situation one on one. This would be very helpful in the hitting situation like the one you mentioned. Not only does it "teach" the child, it also teaches YOU to become more of an expert by paying attention to how the professionals do it!
A caveat, this was nine years ago in the state of PA. This was for a child who had ADHD, not autism. But I would think that a child who has autism would have even more access to state care.
Toph, I was referring to the nephew. It seems very obvious to me that he is in an untenable situation with a mother who left him- and is now saying she wants him back- however, if you know anything CURRENT about the stuff I mentioned above, PLEASE correct me!!!!
-sunny10
Posted by Toph on February 17, 2005, at 16:31:26
In reply to Re: To minarose, sidebar to Toph at end, posted by sunny10 on February 17, 2005, at 13:12:57
sunny, I would have to defer to experts on this. I just mentioned a few things I remember from child protection days. That was 13 years ago. I did conduct individual therapy with an autistic boy of 11 for two years while in graduate school. It was mostly play therapy. He was very aggressive with the toys. I wasn't sure I made any headway with him until termination when he became very upset as if he had made an attatchment, a tough thing for these kids to do. Other than that, there are many people who I am certain could give much better advice than I.
Sunny, please be careful not to expect too much from me, I have disappointed so many people in my life. I'm afraid you'll just be another one some day.
Toph
Posted by Toph on February 18, 2005, at 3:05:04
In reply to Re: To minarose, sidebar to Toph at end, posted by sunny10 on February 17, 2005, at 13:12:57
Posted by sunny10 on February 18, 2005, at 10:16:21
In reply to sidebar » sunny10, posted by Toph on February 17, 2005, at 16:31:26
don't be silly- I had forgotten that it has been 13 years since you were involved with it....
MY error, not yours!!!!!!!
Posted by Toph on February 18, 2005, at 11:51:06
In reply to Re: sidebar » Toph, posted by sunny10 on February 18, 2005, at 10:16:21
Posted by sunny10 on February 18, 2005, at 12:01:22
In reply to Whew, thought I offended you (nm) » sunny10, posted by Toph on February 18, 2005, at 11:51:06
more likely that I offended you by *ss-u-me-ing....
This is the end of the thread.
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