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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 19 of 19. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by saw on October 1, 2004, at 2:06:33
I am going to be very, very selfish this morning and post this BEFORE I have read all the new posts. I always do that. But today, I have a very, very big problem. Actually, I should just be dead. Maybe then I would be at peace and less people have to worry about me.
My wheels have fallen off. I have had enough. I am sick and tired of always being sick and tired.
I have NEVER, NEVER, NEVER in my life consumed alcohol in the morning. I have been at work for one hour and 3 people have asked me if I'm ok. Am I ok???? *&%^$# IT, I'm DRUNK!!!!!!!! That's how ok I am. I downed 2 big glasses of wine for breakfast. (And swallowed my Effexor with it Hee Haa)
And I really, really, really, really, da di da di da want another drink
Very sad and broken (and d %^(*&^(* nk) Sabrina
Posted by partlycloudy on October 1, 2004, at 6:49:47
In reply to GAME OVER, posted by saw on October 1, 2004, at 2:06:33
((((Sabrina)))) I'm sorry you had to do that to get to work today. At least it's Friday. I could lend you my synglasses from yesterday afternoon, OK? And your day is almost over and you won't have to talk to anyone about how you are feeling. Hope your hangover is not too bad, sweetie.
pc
Posted by saw on October 1, 2004, at 6:51:24
In reply to Re: GAME OVER » saw, posted by partlycloudy on October 1, 2004, at 6:49:47
I can't remember when last I had a hangover. I don't get them. Now ain't that a hoot!
Posted by partlycloudy on October 1, 2004, at 7:19:39
In reply to Re: GAME OVER » partlycloudy, posted by saw on October 1, 2004, at 6:51:24
I seem to have plenty to go around....
Posted by ron1953 on October 1, 2004, at 11:05:50
In reply to GAME OVER, posted by saw on October 1, 2004, at 2:06:33
Sabrina:
I'm really sorry you're having such a tough time. I can empathize with how you feel.
I am constantly amazed with my own stupidity to self-medicate with alcohol when I know damn well it exacerbates my depression. I promise myself again and again to stop but still sometimes give in to the desire to drown my sorrows in the oblivion of booze. I don't get hung over but I can feel the depressive effects for 2-3 days after a bender. Then I feel better, make the same promises and start the cycle over again. I feel stupid and weak, especially with the obvious evidence that's right in front of my nose.
Posted by Jai Narayan on October 1, 2004, at 12:14:44
In reply to GAME OVER, posted by saw on October 1, 2004, at 2:06:33
> Actually, I should just be dead. Maybe then I would be at peace and less people have to worry about me.
**I appreicate you so much. The I am disturbed by the above sentence.
>
> I am sick and tired of always being sick and tired.**I can understand the frustration.
I hope the rest of your day gets better. Please keep us posted. I am thinking of you today. Sending you loving energy...: )
Jai
Posted by Susan47 on October 1, 2004, at 12:27:12
In reply to Re: GAME OVER » partlycloudy, posted by saw on October 1, 2004, at 6:51:24
Oh Sabrina, I hope you don't get in trouble at work now.
You're gambling big time, aren't you?
Why?
Been there done that but not to quite this extent. What's going on?
Posted by alesta on October 1, 2004, at 13:45:57
In reply to GAME OVER, posted by saw on October 1, 2004, at 2:06:33
hi, sabrina,:)
i'm wondering the same thing..what triggered you to drink this morning? was it just the desire for alcohol or did something bad happen to drive you to it? please don't do this to yourself again..it's gonna be all right..please let us know what's troubling you..(((((((sabrina)))))
amy:)
Posted by Angela2 on October 1, 2004, at 15:10:18
In reply to GAME OVER, posted by saw on October 1, 2004, at 2:06:33
Sabrina,
I am going to tell you something my academic counselor told me when I skipped class last week. It's ok to give in to our urges once in a long while, but doing them everyday can have devastating maladaptive consequences. I'm glad you realize what you did was wrong. Another thought: maybe you needed this day to do this? Just a thought. I mean, are you having any fun? I don't know. I've never gone to work drunk. I am thinking of you, and feel free to post any time, I am listening.
Angela
Posted by Cass on October 1, 2004, at 15:39:21
In reply to Re: GAME OVER, posted by Angela2 on October 1, 2004, at 15:10:18
Sabrina,
I'm sorry you're feeling so down. This too shall pass.
You have all of our support. Keep posting.
We love you.
Posted by Emme on October 1, 2004, at 19:42:01
In reply to GAME OVER, posted by saw on October 1, 2004, at 2:06:33
> Actually, I should just be dead. Maybe then I would be at peace and less people have to worry about me.
No no no no no!! We like you here! It distresses me that you feel that way.
> My wheels have fallen off. I have had enough. I am sick and tired of always being sick and tired.
>
> I have NEVER, NEVER, NEVER in my life consumed alcohol in the morning. I have been at work for one hour and 3 people have asked me if I'm ok. Am I ok???? *&%^$# IT, I'm DRUNK!!!!!!!! That's how ok I am. I downed 2 big glasses of wine for breakfast. (And swallowed my Effexor with it Hee Haa)
>
> And I really, really, really, really, da di da di da want another drink
>
> Very sad and broken (and d %^(*&^(* nk) SabrinaOh, I'm so sorry your day got off to such a rough start and you're feeling so low. Let us know if there's something triggering your downturn that we can help you with - even if it's just to vent.
Give yourself some pampering and I hope tomorrow is a better day.
Emme
Posted by Fred23 on October 2, 2004, at 16:53:59
In reply to GAME OVER, posted by saw on October 1, 2004, at 2:06:33
> I have NEVER, NEVER, NEVER in my life consumed alcohol in the morning. I have been at work for one hour and 3 people have asked me if I'm ok. Am I ok???? *&%^$# IT, I'm DRUNK!!!!!!!! That's how ok I am. I downed 2 big glasses of wine for breakfast. (And swallowed my Effexor with it Hee Haa)
>
> And I really, really, really, really, da di da di da want another drinkHopefully some kind co-workers will have gotten you home safely, without incident, if they noticed that you are intoxicated.
If that's the only time it's happened, your company should go easy on you.
(Drinking without detection at work needs good quality vodka, though, not wine. <grin> )
Posted by saw on October 4, 2004, at 0:39:02
In reply to Re: GAME OVER, posted by Jai Narayan on October 1, 2004, at 12:14:44
Thank you for appreciating me Jai.
Sabrina
Posted by saw on October 4, 2004, at 0:40:41
In reply to Re: GAME OVER, posted by Susan47 on October 1, 2004, at 12:27:12
Hi Susan
Honestly don't know what's going on or what is wrong. Just a moment of complete weakness and madness coupled with the fact that I had not yet gone to sleep when it was time to get ready for work.
It's a gamble I'm not prepared to take though so am working really hard to ensure it doesn't happen again.
Thanks for your thoughts
Sabrina
Posted by saw on October 4, 2004, at 0:43:47
In reply to Re: GAME OVER » saw, posted by alesta on October 1, 2004, at 13:45:57
Thanks Amy
I don't think anything triggered me in particular. I don't even think there is anything specific wrong. I do know that I felt it would just be easier to get through the day if I were buzzing. I had an incredibly surreal feel that morning. Almost as though I was watching myself from above. I remember a strong sense of just wanting to float, of just wanting to get through the day feeling happy. Happy is a feeling that sometimes happens when drinking. As I said to Susan, I think it was just a moment temporary madness that I doubt I will let happen again.
Thanks for your kind thoughts.
Sabrina
Posted by saw on October 4, 2004, at 0:47:17
In reply to Re: GAME OVER, posted by Angela2 on October 1, 2004, at 15:10:18
Hi Angela
I like the thought that maybe I needed to do this. No, I didn't have fun. Especially when the effects had worn off. Then I was feeling totally whacked and tired, and just wanting more. It was a strange urge to say the least. I doubt it will happen again.
Thanks for listening
Sabrina
Posted by saw on October 4, 2004, at 0:52:06
In reply to Re: GAME OVER » saw, posted by Fred23 on October 2, 2004, at 16:53:59
Fortunately, I was not that intoxicated that it was noticable. That and the fact that I have my office so was able to hide.
I looked quite hyper though. My company would fire my *ss, not go easy on me, so I doubt, or at least, I will try, not to let the wheels fall off like this again.
(And have always got Vodka at home :-)
Sabrina
Posted by saw on October 4, 2004, at 0:54:14
In reply to Re: GAME OVER, posted by ron1953 on October 1, 2004, at 11:05:50
leaves me feeling very grateful for my friends. I felt okay being able to post and from the lack of judgement I received, can see that it was ok to do so.
Thank you everyone for your kind words and support. I really do appreciate it.
I had an ok weekend and am feeling ok today. I am just battling to come to terms with my humungous stomach that just gets bigger by the day.
Love to you all
Sabrina
Posted by Jai Narayan on October 4, 2004, at 10:03:56
In reply to Re: GAME OVER » Jai Narayan, posted by saw on October 4, 2004, at 0:39:02
This is the end of the thread.
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