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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 9 of 9. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by rainyday on April 16, 2004, at 7:54:07
I don't when it started, but I have noticed that I can't talk to people without wringing my hands. I look like Aunty Em!!
Dorothy!! Dorothy!! Where are you??
I am so-o-o-o self conscious of this. I tried to put my hands behind my back, but I felt like I was constricting myself and had to fidget. If I am not wringing, I ball my fists up.
I can fight you on one leg! I can fight you with one hand behind my back!
Posted by All Done on April 16, 2004, at 10:28:12
In reply to Wringing my hands, posted by rainyday on April 16, 2004, at 7:54:07
rainyday,
You know, I've recently developed this habit but only when I'm with my T. It was especially bad at my last session and I have no idea why. He occasionally glances at my hands and this makes it worse. Ugh. Distracting for both of us, I think. I do the fist thing, too, but most of the time since I'm sitting, I cross my legs and wedge my hands in between my knees. Lovely.
I shake my leg when I'm sitting, too, and then my office chair squeaks and it drives my coworkers nuts.
Ahh, nervous energy...gotta love it. Maybe we could have a leg wrestling match? No hands involved.
Posted by rainyday on April 16, 2004, at 10:53:44
In reply to Re: Wringing my hands » rainyday, posted by All Done on April 16, 2004, at 10:28:12
I don't know - I always won leg wrestling with my big brother!!!!
Posted by Tootercat on April 16, 2004, at 11:10:28
In reply to Re: Wringing my hands » All Done, posted by rainyday on April 16, 2004, at 10:53:44
Rainy, If they cut off my hands I would NOT be able to talk! My coworkers would vote for the amputation I can guarantee you! LOL Unless somebody points it out to you I would just consider it your own personal idiosyncracy. Here's a thought: do either of your parents do this same thing? I know I have multiple "quirks" that are replications of things done by one or the other of my parents. Try not to let this one occupy too much time...unless you find that you can't drive without wringing your hands.... (whereupon your hands AREN'T on the steering wheel) I don't mean to make light of this as it does bother you. I just hate to see you pick on yourself.
Hugs,
Toots
Posted by rainyday on April 16, 2004, at 12:03:23
In reply to Re: Wringing my hands » rainyday, posted by Tootercat on April 16, 2004, at 11:10:28
...no wonder they call you Mom!!! No, nobody in my family does this, and it is a new thing for me. Funny enough, it doesn't happen if I am talking to a group of people, just one on one.
I talk on the phone with my hands. I swear it makes it easier to talk. If I am really wound up, I start to stutter. H-h-h-h-h-o-w attractive!!!
OK, enough beating up on myself. Nobody does it better!
rainyday
Posted by spoc on April 17, 2004, at 9:19:43
In reply to Wringing my hands, posted by rainyday on April 16, 2004, at 7:54:07
> I don't when it started, but I have noticed that I can't talk to people without wringing my hands. I look like Aunty Em!! >
> I am so-o-o-o self conscious of this. I tried to put my hands behind my back, but I felt like I was constricting myself and had to fidget. If I am not wringing, I ball my fists up.>
------------
Hi Rainyday,Could you become one of those people who constantly has a water bottle attached to them? This could help and not be an unusual way to fidget. The more complicated the bottle, the better in this case! You can pull the cap and spout off and on and up and down; drink; run your hands over the grooves of the bottle if it has them. When I was seeing a therapist recently (and this one said little, leaving room for some pauses to fill), I had bought a bunch of a type called Propel Fitness Water by Gatorade. One of the bottle styles you can get it in isn't all that conducive to actual drinking! The top is complicated and the water doesn't flow well out of it, so if you really want a drink, you're better off just screwing it off completely. So there's one more thing to do with it! The rest of the time I just play with the cap.
Now that you mentioned this I do realize that I take a water bottle almost everywhere; do fidget with it a lot; and no one has ever noticed it (must look like a normal kind of fidgeting, like when you twirl your hair around your finger or something). This also helps by getting you to drink more water if you have it with you all the time. Most of the time after the bottle is empty I just refill it with regular water that day. You can even get "sling" type bottle holders at fitness stores so you can carry one all the time, and you'll just look committed to this water bottle health trend. Anyway, might want to give it a shot! ;- )
Posted by fallsfall on April 18, 2004, at 9:32:02
In reply to Re: Wringing my hands » rainyday, posted by spoc on April 17, 2004, at 9:19:43
I, too, do the water bottle thing. It started because my meds gave me dry mouth (still do sometimes). But I definately expend a bunch of nervous energy on my water bottle. Some brands have more interesting bumps and ridges than others. It is important, every once in a while, to rinse them with very hot water, otherwise they can grow stuff...
Rainyday, I was wondering if putting one hand in a pocket might work if you aren't holding anything. I keep a rabbit's foot in my pocket (and in my pocketbook when I am in the unfortunate position of not having a pocket) - so if things get tense I can fiddle with the rabbit's foot in my pocket.
Posted by rainyday on April 18, 2004, at 11:56:59
In reply to Re: Wringing my hands » rainyday, posted by spoc on April 17, 2004, at 9:19:43
Great suggestions - thank you all. I made an association a few weeks ago with amber (you know, the fossilized resin) with some very warm family memories. I was wearing a piece every day to reinforce the positive memories and associations. I would handle the amber hanging around my neck and feel a little more relaxed and less threatened by life in general. It would make a lot of sense to just put a piece in my pocket as my rabbits foot. It would look better than whipping amber around my neck, too.
The water is a great idea - I have dry mouth from the meds too, but I have been refilling a cup a thousand times a day. Definitely, the tactile distraction of the ridges and bumps on a bottle would help to calm my restless hands.
I do feel like a boob having these answers so obviously in front of me already, but I need smart people on this board to point them out!!!
Once again, you guys are great!
(((hugs to fellow PBers)))
Posted by spoc on April 18, 2004, at 17:39:04
In reply to Water bottle, objects to hold, posted by rainyday on April 18, 2004, at 11:56:59
> I do feel like a boob having these answers so obviously in front of me already, but I need smart people on this board to point them out!!!>
-----Oh, don't worry, I'm sure people are perfectly content to assume that their ideas were more brilliant than obvious! Ha ha! ;- )
Hey, I was wondering if you could even try getting one of those little coiled hand exercisers that you grip and squeeze. You could come up with many different reasons why you wanted to use one of those if asked. From some weakness due to a strain, to having heard that it's a particularly good idea to keep hand muscles strong, to actually laughing it off as making constructive use of fidgetiness!
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