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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 13 of 13. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by KID A on March 18, 2004, at 8:21:53
01. Waking up your neighbors in the morning blasting Miles Davis.
02. Stepping on a bug by accident, if they were bigger than you, they would probably step on you by accident as well... but we must treat all life as equal, so, wish it well in it's next life.
03. Crying in the emergency room. Medication withdrawl seems so little when you lay a few sheets down from someone who has died. But crying is relativity, it relates to how you feel, never give up on your own pain. It's when we stop feeling pain that we stop living, when we only experience pleasure, we have no appreciation for it, skin up, we're allready dead.
04. Not Dying for you Country. A famous man, whom I forget because I'm a forgetting medicated b@st4rd... said, I would rather die for a friend than my country. This is true? What has your country done for you latetly? O'le Maggie is dead aint she? We got dem bushes, dem russians want to steal America... but they gone, we stomped them out in a shopping spree for missles... we got no enemies, we gots to make new ones... lets try to take out our old buddies from the eighties... dats gud, America him slow, don't wanna know, look up dem faks...
05. Burping after eating a big meal. Well, lets not be to hasty, no one prefers to hear a hellacious belch in the middle of the Four Seasons where the stars of Sex & the City are contimplating Sex within the City, rather than talking about the relationship in style between Virgina Woolf's Mrs Dalloway and James Joyce's Ulyssys... but people burp... make other noises, it's natural... Bukowski, seeing a dead swan was startled and thought of moving it from the park, then thought again how selfish and wrong it was of him to be 'embarased' for it's death... we all do these things... we're human, don't go nuts, but still... we're human.
06. Not giving a penny for the Old Guy. Guy Fawlkes could have been forgotten forever, nobody would have known this man who tried to blow up the parliament... but instead, they made a holliday of him, it's like giving a day off of work for the Unibomber (not a dumb lad, a bit radical, harmful, but no dummy)... By effigy, and holliday they've assured us that we'll never forget Guy Falwks... He lives on in infamy; and fame is always for people who would rather die scorned, than forgotten.
07. Lonely birthdays, lonely valentines, lonely christmases, et al... These are just one day just like all the other 365 or so that our planet revolves around the earth... we assign them value out of tradition, oh I hate being one year older, oh look at those clothes, oh look at that style, it's so old... rejoice in your own holliday, each day you wake is another night you've made it through, not to slip the cable... there will be plenty of time to sleep later... if we didn't call white, white, we'd call it black? Understand, it's irrelivent.
08. Celebrity Death. Death isn't a good thing, give or take the ending of a years suffering of Cancer, which I've seen, then it seems like a godsend to the recipient... But don't shed too many tears when Natalie Wood jumps off the boat, so did Hart Crane, and his life was ten times more meaningful... I guess... he wrote poetry, TS Elliot said he had the 'brain of a pin'... ouchie... but, still it's all equinimitous... for ever celebrated lost cast member of "Family Affair", there are hundreds upon thousands of nameless people starving in the world who were unfortunate to have never starred in a film or television show... Let's not push them into the dying of the light. But don't forget the little people who mostly, don't even get so much as a writ, in the obit.
09. Your face in the mirror at 4am... Can't sleep, up again, went to bed at eleven, turn over on your left side, uncomfortable, turn over on your right side, uncomfortable, look at the clock, 12:15, look at the clock 1:34, look at the clock 2:45... and on... you get up, and walk to the bathroom, to do some business or something, get a glass of water... can't sleep, can't sleep, can't sleep... something inside us is keeping us awake... when you look at yourself, don't look too long, you'll fall into yourself, you'll see your father, or your mother, your old friend from austin, and you'll have to smash out the image... go back to bed, sleep will come if you stop thinking about it. i like to pretend i'm the only inhabitant of a huge submarine... lying there, miles under the ocean, the pressure of the deep compressing the walls... everything still except for the red lights... the black metal, alone, peacefull... with no distractions... no chirping night birds. sleep comes.
10. yourself. you never promised anyone a rose garden. yell in the street. destroy a toaster if it burns your toast at the lowest setting, quite expensive if you keep buying the same brand from your local toaster store... but cathartic nonetheless... why not fling paint at the walls, become your own Jackson Pollock... forget everyone else... what do you owe them? only kindness in return... treat everyone with kindness even if they treat you badly... it's the Diamond Way... but never feel embarased or shameful of yourself. you're letting you ego get to you old dear... that's not good. vajra kisses... diamond thunderbolt, be here now.
love. namaste.
zenhussy wishes you all good day, too.
Posted by Jai Narayan on March 18, 2004, at 10:28:36
In reply to Ten Things Not to be Sorry For., posted by KID A on March 18, 2004, at 8:21:53
Nice writing. I am inspired.
1. My teeth not falling out. I like having them just where they are, although they are rotting.
2. losing weight instead of gaining. I break out into a sweat every time I step onto my scale. Let's face the facts, I break into a sweat over anything or nothing.
3. Not breaking into a sweat. Okay I can't celebrate that very often.
4. Sleeping. I love to sleep. Deep and restful nights sleep. Before Ambien I was one of the many roaming my apartment at 3am. I would be staring out the window wondering why there were others awake and about in their cars, walking and staring at me from their windows. It often felt like there was no one home in my head after nights of no sleep.
5. That our local nuclear plant has not killed us. I celebrate that everyday and a chill rushes through my body when the siren sounds by accident.
6. that I don't have to go through my dad dying again. Once was way too much and I am now not so upset. I have made my peace with his goneness.
7. That I love and am loved.
8. that you have gotten me to do this writing because it's making me real happy.
9. That I have no major illness right now.
10. For all the birds that are flooding our rivers and trees and it's spring.
Sat Nam
Jai Narayan
ps (I miss you Zenhussy)
Posted by DaisyM on March 18, 2004, at 10:56:35
In reply to wow you raised the bar for 10 things, posted by Jai Narayan on March 18, 2004, at 10:28:36
Ten Things Not to Be Sorry For
1) Risking spoiling my babies by holding them too much.
2) Overfeeding my cat her favorite treats.
3) Being late again because I stayed in the car to listen to my favorite song.
4) Letting Peter, Paul and Mary concert on PBS make me cry last night
5) Buying another pair of red shoes I don't really need
6) Not vacuuming the lint on the back of my refrigerator...ever.
7) Knowing the lyrics to all the songs in Grease and always singing along.
8) Getting a degree in a major that I now don't use.
9) Getting excited about creating Easter baskets, coloring eggs and planning egg hunts, though my kids are big now.
10) Spending money on therapy.
Posted by EmmyS on March 18, 2004, at 12:08:17
In reply to Re: wow you raised the bar for 10 things, posted by DaisyM on March 18, 2004, at 10:56:35
Your list made me cry. Either it was particularly sweet, or I am PMSing. Perhaps both. I better go check my calendar. Regardless, you sound like a wonderful woman.
Emmy
Posted by Slinky on March 18, 2004, at 13:23:48
In reply to Ten Things Not to be Sorry For., posted by KID A on March 18, 2004, at 8:21:53
Perhaps I will love...me
Thanks for the rides..the sharps the softs and the other dimensions...
InspireX2..so good I'll say it twi......
I'm tired of my burden of self pity...I drown my minds eye in horrors to feel gratitude.
It comes and goes.
I wished to swop my 37 years to another 37 years who died in a train crash---she was loved and hopeful.
See the edge of our solar sytem ..the rubble from bigbang..sling shot into infinity
PLUTO is no planet.
Yet again I'm sensless and naked.
Don't you mean Surrey ~questionmark
My tangents so embarrasingly dull...but hard to control.
Posted by justyourlaugh on March 18, 2004, at 16:14:48
In reply to Re: Ten Things Not to be Sorry For. » KID A, posted by Slinky on March 18, 2004, at 13:23:48
wow,
those are all very wonderful things..
i promised i could allow myself to do nothing for a day or two but just cant seem to get going..
i feel like i waste everyday..
nothing is ever done or even started..
i fear i made some bad choices and depression is my punishment..
i want to do things that are destructive..
i fight the powers of evil everyday...only to see the evil is me.
j
wait...
1. i am sober
Posted by KID A on March 18, 2004, at 17:55:20
In reply to Re: Ten Things Not to be Sorry For. » KID A, posted by Slinky on March 18, 2004, at 13:23:48
do you ever get tired of giving directions on the black line? oh you're just three shy years of me, out flying there over hearing someone say "I Do..."
the kids got no respect for the law today, and blah blah blah...
and so we have these big things like stars, and planets, and pluto is not a dang planet!!! its a satelite, its lumpy... planets are round, gravity makes them that way... things collapse inwards... turn on stars, if they're massive enough.
yet again i'm senseless on on edge, borrowing power, what's around that corner, who's outside my house... when are they comming for me?
sososososos so... lit
ttle spar
ow
s
ing
ing.
we have these stars again, these galaxies, and they all started from teency weency quantum fields... little tiny ripples... as the universe was cooling off, during the inflation phase before the big bang phase... we have all these different waves, all phase invarient, meaning that although their frequencies may be different, their strengths are all equal...so you put them all together, and the make little lumps of gravity, little pockets, where there coallese stars, and from the dust, planets, and the moons revolve around the planets and the planets revolve around the sun, and the suns revolve around each other gravitationally...
all from those tiny little waves.
kid a waves hello.
i'm not being fresh, but i'll take care of loving you when you tucker out. take a rest in your favourite chair.
when will my taxes come and buy me the world?
Posted by DaisyM on March 18, 2004, at 23:36:41
In reply to Re: wow you raised the bar for 10 things » DaisyM, posted by EmmyS on March 18, 2004, at 12:08:17
THANK YOU. I hope you aren't PMSing but either way it is nice to know I touched someone. You didn't post your list though...
I should add one more:
The time I spend on Babble.
Posted by EmmyS on March 19, 2004, at 6:00:05
In reply to Re: wow you raised the bar for 10 things » EmmyS, posted by DaisyM on March 18, 2004, at 23:36:41
Well...good news. It wasn't PMS! So, it was all you, girl. I tried to come up with a list. Got one. Hmm...must keep working. Em
Posted by noa on March 19, 2004, at 19:28:57
In reply to Ten Things Not to be Sorry For., posted by KID A on March 18, 2004, at 8:21:53
So THAT is what Guy Fawkes day is about! I always wondered!
Loved your post, babe.
Posted by noa on March 19, 2004, at 19:32:27
In reply to Re: Ten Things Not to be Sorry For., posted by justyourlaugh on March 18, 2004, at 16:14:48
wait...
1. i am soberThat one is worth 10 all by its lonesome! Congratulations, JYL. Rooting for you every day. Some are good, some are bad, some just are. But here's to your wonderful endurance!
Posted by inthegloaming on March 23, 2004, at 1:47:22
In reply to Ten Things Not to be Sorry For., posted by KID A on March 18, 2004, at 8:21:53
10) Yelling when you stub your toe. Cos gosh $#%# it, it HURTS!
9) Sleeping with a stuffed animal when you are over X years old. Sometimes we all just need the comfort.
8) Accepting an offer--which is harder to do than one thinks. If they want to make you soup when you're sick, let them make you soup when you're sick.
7) Crying on the subway. If it hurts that bad, let it hurt that bad for that moment. It's nobody's business but your own.
6) Needing a place to sleep.
5) Cheating on an impossible, self-harming diet.
4) Throwing the second punch.
3) Worrying about your family.
2) Harboring anger for someone who has truly, truly done you wrong, even if you want to "get over it." Some things cannot and should not be forgiven.
1) Loving someone. We berrate ourselves for this ALWAYS. We're not good enough, not special enough, not his/her type, don't fall into his/her catagory of sexual prefence... Love is a good force, when it doesn't go bad.
Posted by pegasus on March 23, 2004, at 17:16:58
In reply to Re: Ten Things Not to be Sorry For., posted by inthegloaming on March 23, 2004, at 1:47:22
inthegloaming, I loved your list. Here's my try:
1. Not working more than what you're paid for. Hey, some of us are not on that corporate ladder on purpose.
2. Not having as much stuff as the next person. Stuff is overrated.
3. Loving what you love. You can try to fight it, but it'll probably come back around anyway. You might as just go ahead and acknowledge it, and enjoy it.
4. Googling your T. This is 2004. People should expect to be googled by anyone who has some interest in them.
5. Asking for help when you really aren't doing well.
6. Not ordering a drink in a bar (I actually apologized to the server for this once - what a doofus! It's ok if I was just there for the company!)
7. Asking outright about how someone is when you're worried. As in, "Are you ok? I'm worried about you." Or, "Are you thinking about killing yourself?"
8. Being confused or ambivalent about therapy.
9. Doing whatever maladaptive things you have to do to get through the night sometimes.
10. Posting about your problems on Babble.
- p
This is the end of the thread.
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