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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 9 of 9. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by fayth on December 26, 2003, at 11:04:19
Is there anyone out there? I have been sobbing all morning. I can't call and ask my doc any questions outside of a once a month session... my mom just screams in my face that I am not trying hard enough// I have looked everywhere for an honest compassionate docter and cant find one.. right now I have no hope left... Is major depression part of going down and off this drug? I am afraid every night when I go to bed that I wont wake up again.. that these idiots who have made so many mistakes will wind up making a fatal one.. 3 years and still not a hope in sight of a descent docter or any help. Now my mother says if I dont stop crying she's just totally going to stop helping me at all... I dont know how to get thru this without a doc to talk to... I could if I had one.. my heart is so compleately broken. Anyone help at all? Please
Posted by octopusprime on December 26, 2003, at 13:02:45
In reply to I feel like I just cant anymore, posted by fayth on December 26, 2003, at 11:04:19
fayth i'm sorry to hear you're having such a tough time, especially over the holidays.
for the strictly medication-related issues, you can try posting on http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/
they might be able to help with xanax detox.unfortunately i can't give you the name of a good doctor in nyc. and i see you're looking hard for the help and support you need, and not finding it. :(
i'm concerned about you and i'm glad that you're reaching out. you sound like you need somebody supportive to talk to. can you call a crisis line? http://suicidehotlines.com/newyork.html
depression comes from a lot of things. the brain chemistry is one thing, but financial pressures and stresses from family and friends are another. are you seeing a counselor, therapist, or other supportive person that can help you work through your anger and frustration?
i'm sorry i can't be much help, but you're not alone, and there are many posters here who have come back from chemical dependency of many kinds. it's a long and tough process. but if you're committed to being well, keep seeking out help for your body (and talk for your mind). there is hope.
good luck.
Posted by SLS on December 26, 2003, at 14:57:33
In reply to I feel like I just cant anymore, posted by fayth on December 26, 2003, at 11:04:19
> I have looked everywhere for an honest compassionate docter and cant find one..
There is a doctor at NYU that I found to be very compassionate and more than competent. His name is Matthew Smith, MD. I think his number is 212-213-8104. He takes Medicare.
- Scott
Posted by fayth on December 26, 2003, at 17:43:08
In reply to Re: I feel like I just cant anymore, posted by SLS on December 26, 2003, at 14:57:33
Thank you for the name but funny enough he was the docter who put me on 6 to8 mgs of klonapin a day and then dumped me when i told him I couldnt take that medication... weird huh?
Posted by deirdrehbrt on December 26, 2003, at 21:07:01
In reply to Re: I feel like I just cant anymore, posted by fayth on December 26, 2003, at 17:43:08
Fayth,
I'm so sorry that you have to go through all of this trouble. Holidays are especially difficult for me as well. Like you, I have a family who doesn't understand mental illness. Perhaps your mother doesn't know what you are really going through. It might be helpfull to find someone who can speak to both of you and help her understand.I am surprised that your doctor won't allow you to call between visits. Is this a psychiatrist? Do you have someone else to confide in? I am also surprised that you are seeing someone so infrequently. Usually when someone is having difficulties, they can speak to someone a little more often.
I don't know if this will help, but I once explained depression to my Father. I asked him to remember when his mother had died, and how at the reception after the funeral he was laughing and joking with his brothers and friends. I showed him that when people are sad or hurt, they can still find the capacity to laugh, joke, and enjoy. I told him that when people are depressed, they can't 'cheer-up', they can't enjoy other people that much, and they can't just snap out of it. That's why it is a disease. Your mother needs to understand that you can't stop crying because that is the nature of the disease. It's not a matter of will-power because you can't will any disease away. Moods can change. Illness persists until it is cured or controlled.
I hope this helps.
Dee.
Posted by SLS on December 26, 2003, at 21:15:44
In reply to Re: I feel like I just cant anymore, posted by fayth on December 26, 2003, at 17:43:08
> Thank you for the name but funny enough he was the docter who put me on 6 to8 mgs of klonapin a day and then dumped me when i told him I couldnt take that medication... weird huh?
Don't I look foolish. Sorry... I'm surprised he pushed Klonopin so high. Perhaps you can call Columbia Presbyterian to get a referral.Hang in there. There is plenty of support here to help you get through this bad time.
- Scott
Posted by deirdrehbrt on December 26, 2003, at 21:24:39
In reply to Re: I feel like I just cant anymore » fayth, posted by SLS on December 26, 2003, at 21:15:44
Fayth,
One more site to look at if things are rough:They have a lot of good advice for the depressed and suicidal. They list things that are both free, and for cost.
Dee.
Posted by fayth on December 26, 2003, at 21:36:56
In reply to Re: I feel like I just cant anymore, posted by fayth on December 26, 2003, at 17:43:08
Thank you all for support. Yeah this docter is a psych meds person.. I dont know how I am supposed to do this seeing her once a month and not being able to call and ask questions. I guess they dont think its a big deal... I get alot of body aches.. they say its not from xanax but Ive read that it happens.. I dont know if this depression has to do with the going down on xanax or what.. I just got a therapist.. psych doc was a little mad that it was someone outside the clinic but they gave me some guy who admitedly knows NOTHING about how to counsel someone going down and off this drug so what good is he to me?? On monday I am going to sign a release so that she can talk to this meds person on my behalf to see if we cant get more support from her..
I just feel like in this whole year nothings gotten better and I cant stand that.. it has to have some relief and some part of me feels like I have failed... my mom certainly thinks so. My sister dosnt even speak to me because she dosnt believe in anti depressants so I dont have a sister anymore either.. If I could go back I would have never let these people touch me.. but I cant go back. I hope the new year brings all of this to an end...
Posted by deirdrehbrt on December 26, 2003, at 21:57:22
In reply to Re: I feel like I just cant anymore, posted by fayth on December 26, 2003, at 21:36:56
Fayth,
I'm glad that you are going to see a therapist. I don't think that it matters if they have specific experience with Xanax withdrawl. If they have experience with withdrawl from any meds, they can be helpfull to you. The most important thing is that you are seeing a therapist to help you deal with the depression.
As far as dealing with your sister, some things that might help:
Diabetics.... they need insulin.
epileptics.... need anti-seisure medication
M.S. .... They need meds.I have a friend whom I met in the hospital. She was bipolar and had MS. One day, she was manic, and when she came down, she couldn't get up out of her chair. The bipolar triggered her MS. For those who don't believe in the biological nature of depression, mania, and bipolar, this was a very good example of the relationship.
Antidepressants do help. It is important for you to remember though that not all of them work for everyone. It is likely that what they give you to start will work, but there is a chance that it won't. That's why they have Effexor, Wellbutrin, Zoloft, and a bunch of others.
From the way you've been speaking in your posts, it looks like you will work really hard to get better. That is probably the most important factor. So work hard, but please don't get down on yourself if things don't progress as fast as you think they should. Some people experience almost a miracle a few weeks after starting meds. Others, like myself, (I have multiple diagnoses) don't see improvement after over a year or more. If you read some of the other threads, you'll become acquainted with people who've been working for a great deal of time with their illnesses.
Take care,
Dee.
This is the end of the thread.
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