Psycho-Babble Social Thread 292110

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A letter for a depressed friend?

Posted by angiebaby on December 21, 2003, at 11:16:28

Hello friends,

I'm faced with a dillemma, and I thought that there would be no better place to recieve good feedback than from here.

My best friend's brother was diagnosed with depression after a suicide attempt last week. I went through the same thing a year ago. I'm not great friends with him, but have known him for almost 15 years.

I want to write him a letter to tell him that he can call me for advice on anything or for someone who understands what he's going through. It was so hard for me those first few months after being diagnosed and facing the guilt of a suicide attempt, and a co-worker with depression reached out for me and wrote me a letter. I felt so relieved to know that there was someone there who understood my feelings.

Do you think I should write him a letter? Would I be over-stepping my boundaries and making things worse?

Any advice would be much appreciated! Thanks!

 

Re: A letter for a depressed friend? » angiebaby

Posted by judy1 on December 21, 2003, at 11:49:48

In reply to A letter for a depressed friend?, posted by angiebaby on December 21, 2003, at 11:16:28

I think that would be an awesome thing to do- a phone call is too much pressure, but a letter can be handled when he's ready. As someone who has also been there, it would have meant a great deal to me.
take care, judy

 

Re: A letter for a depressed friend?

Posted by 8 Miles on December 21, 2003, at 17:25:22

In reply to A letter for a depressed friend?, posted by angiebaby on December 21, 2003, at 11:16:28

I don't know, I have mixed feelings on this subject. But not knowing the personalities involved sort of keeps me from providing much advice (other than generalities). Writing a card or letter in a very short form may open the door for you to communicate more in depth. If you say too much, at first, even your best intentions might not be well received. As you are aware, it may take several months until a Pdoc can find the proper medical treatment, and at least another month or so for those meds to take effect (fully). My advice would be to throw out a loosely written card where you may suggest that you would be happy to listen or advise him. At this early stage in his treatment, he might perceive anything more in depth as a threat or as further evidence he DOES have some problems, and others are now aware of them. Many of us don't like to admit our self-perceived weaknesses, especially in the mystery of the mind. So, short and sweet with an open door, not too overt.


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