Psycho-Babble Social Thread 235597

Shown: posts 1 to 11 of 11. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

Is this ridiculous?

Posted by yesac on June 20, 2003, at 20:18:24

Okay. So the other night I got a phone call from an old friend who I haven't seen in 4 years. She is going to be in my area this weekend and thought we could get together. Which of course is natural. And I do want to. But I feel so entirely apprehensive about it. To the point that I almost would rather just avoid getting together just to not have to be so fearful. This is how I always feel about these things. I end up just getting so anxious/apprehensive and it totally preoccupies my mind. But usually I do it and it turns out okay. I don't know. I wish I wasn't so fearful.

 

Re: Is this ridiculous? » yesac

Posted by Miller on June 20, 2003, at 20:36:25

In reply to Is this ridiculous?, posted by yesac on June 20, 2003, at 20:18:24

Been there. Yes, it really sucks. There have been many missed opportunities because I can't get past my anxiety. My therapist has a way of pushing just hard enough to get me to take one more step than I feel comfortable with. He thinks I don't realize, but I do. Now I am trying to take one more step on my own. It's doesn't always work. But, it is getting better.

Good luck. Think of how nice it will be to see your friend again. It seems like a good opportunity to catch up. Post if you need support.

-Miller

 

Re: Is this ridiculous? » yesac

Posted by Dinah on June 20, 2003, at 21:29:32

In reply to Is this ridiculous?, posted by yesac on June 20, 2003, at 20:18:24

Ridiculous? No. I thought that was perfectly normal. :)

The important thing is that you do force yourself to go, and then find that you enjoy yourself. It sounds healthy enough, if unpleasant to experience. I wish you could forego the anxiety and skip right to the pleasure.

Have a good time!

 

Re: Is this ridiculous?

Posted by janejj on June 20, 2003, at 23:50:44

In reply to Re: Is this ridiculous? » yesac, posted by Dinah on June 20, 2003, at 21:29:32

I feel this way too! I am so often put in this situation these days and it doesn't seem to get that much easier!

However once you are there the anxiety will slip away somewhat and you will be glad that you made the effort.

Good luck
Janejj

 

Re: Is this ridiculous?

Posted by Sabina on June 21, 2003, at 0:48:56

In reply to Re: Is this ridiculous?, posted by janejj on June 20, 2003, at 23:50:44

I often feel this way and have done so since childhood. How I deal with it now is to remind myself of all the things I've missed out on by being like this. I don't do it to beat myself up, mind, but to keep myself from letting anymore missed opportunities accrue. I agree with Dinah, too. Just one step in front of the other and once I'm there, I not only have a good time with my friends, but I feel proud that I was able to overcome my anxiety and let myself live more freely...if only for awhile. Hey, and if you're not glad you went, remember that you can just leave. :)

 

Re: Let us know how it goes? (nm)

Posted by Dinah on June 21, 2003, at 19:26:26

In reply to Is this ridiculous?, posted by yesac on June 20, 2003, at 20:18:24

 

Re: Is this ridiculous?

Posted by justyourlaugh on June 22, 2003, at 0:36:39

In reply to Re: Is this ridiculous?, posted by Sabina on June 21, 2003, at 0:48:56

wow...
i am like that aswell...yet been trapped in the house for years...thought i needed no one...how can i get the old friends to call?
..if you are relaxed ...it will set the pace..
friends...hummmm...hope she does not ...sorry...
please tell us how it went...
make a veggie pasta sauce....simmerimg...easy enough to boil pasta when ready..
j

 

How it went

Posted by yesac on June 22, 2003, at 12:59:48

In reply to Re: Is this ridiculous?, posted by justyourlaugh on June 22, 2003, at 0:36:39

Okay, so I went out with her last night. It wasn't just her, though, but 2 other friends of hers that I don't know who live in the area.

We went to an Asian restaurant, which was good because I had also been all worried about having to explain why I can't eat cheddar cheese if we went to for example a mexican restaurant. But I didn't have to!

It definitely went okay/decent. I felt talkative enough, not withdrawn and quiet. But I wouldn't say that it was GREAT! After dinner, they were going to go out to some bars and invited me, but I declined the offer.

Anyways, so it was okay. I am glad I went but also relieved that it is over!

 

Re: How it went

Posted by Sabina on June 22, 2003, at 14:51:15

In reply to How it went, posted by yesac on June 22, 2003, at 12:59:48

I think you should feel especially proud of yourself considering there were two more people than you bargained for...and strangers, as well. I'm really glad it went well enough for you.

 

Re: How it went

Posted by noa on June 22, 2003, at 21:15:17

In reply to Re: How it went, posted by Sabina on June 22, 2003, at 14:51:15

Yes, Yay You--you did it. Now you can breathe.

 

Re: How it went » yesac

Posted by Dinah on June 23, 2003, at 0:40:14

In reply to How it went, posted by yesac on June 22, 2003, at 12:59:48

Hmmm. Okay/decent sounds pretty good with two unexpected unknown people added. I think anyone who wasn't by nature an extrovert might find that unsettling.

Sounds like you did pretty well, considering.


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