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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 19 to 43 of 60. Go back in thread:
Posted by Emme on June 19, 2003, at 22:12:55
In reply to Maybe it's just me, posted by Dinah on June 19, 2003, at 16:05:55
This board makes me a little sad sometimes because I feel like I can't really figure out how to connect with anyone here or "break in" to the group. Maybe that's because I don't have the time or energy to read and post enough to be a real presence here. Although I have to say that the one time I posted here in total crisis, the replies I got were so warm and smart that I saved them all so I could reread them from time to time.
Emme
Posted by whiterabbit on June 19, 2003, at 22:33:50
In reply to Re: Name change » whiterabbit, posted by Dinah on June 19, 2003, at 19:38:52
I did know it was coming but still, actually holding the papers in your hand that your husband filed to end a 20-year relationship - it's like a hard slap across the face.
8-(
Posted by Emme on June 19, 2003, at 22:55:45
In reply to Re: Name change » Dinah, posted by whiterabbit on June 19, 2003, at 22:33:50
I'm so sorry to hear about that. I'll keep you in my thoughts.Emme
> I did know it was coming but still, actually holding the papers in your hand that your husband filed to end a 20-year relationship - it's like a hard slap across the face.
> 8-(
Posted by jane d on June 19, 2003, at 23:07:17
In reply to Re: Maybe it's just me, posted by Emme on June 19, 2003, at 22:12:55
> This board makes me a little sad sometimes because I feel like I can't really figure out how to connect with anyone here or "break in" to the group. Maybe that's because I don't have the time or energy to read and post enough to be a real presence here. Although I have to say that the one time I posted here in total crisis, the replies I got were so warm and smart that I saved them all so I could reread them from time to time.
>
> Emme
>I also am an intermittent poster. There are a lot of us here. I don't really have the energy to post properly tonight but I wanted to tell you that I felt the same way when I started posting. I think now that I was wrong about that. The "group" fluctuates from day to day - even minute to minute according to who is posting at that time. And you are a part of it as soon as you post.
Jane,
who really, really needs to go to bed now before she starts getting philosophical
Posted by Eddie Sylvano on June 20, 2003, at 9:13:54
In reply to Maybe it's just me, posted by Dinah on June 19, 2003, at 16:05:55
> But lately it seems like Babble has become an in club and I just don't get the jokes. People seem to be talking in code. Passing notes to friends.
-------------Heh. The whole world seems like that to me, so I'm with you.
It's really only the social board that's taken this direction to any extent, which makes sense. Everything else is moderated to some end. maybe we need a babble-babble board.
Posted by yesac on June 20, 2003, at 10:27:56
In reply to Maybe it's just me, posted by Dinah on June 19, 2003, at 16:05:55
About the name change - you are right, it has nothing to do with anything on the board. In fact, I wish that I hadn't felt that I needed to change it, and I gave it a significant amount of thought before doing so. The reason I decided to change it is because my name was much too obvious (it was my initials and last name) and I didn't want anyone who knows me in *real life* to happen upon it and start reading all my posts. I'm much more open on here compared to real life.
As for feeling like an outsider, it doesn't bother me as much as it would in a real social situation, but it does occassionally get to me. What I do is just pretty much ignore the posts that I don't understand or that seem to be directed at certain people. I try to be more open in my own posts so that anyone can feel comfortable with responding, and that's how I want it to be.
Posted by slinky on June 20, 2003, at 10:41:32
In reply to name change + more » Dinah, posted by yesac on June 20, 2003, at 10:27:56
..I change my name when I'm paranoid.
Anyway, I get tired of seeing my name.
It's like putting on fresh underwear.
Yes I put on clean one's daily..although naked is the new dressed in fashion.
Posted by giget on June 20, 2003, at 11:26:28
In reply to Re: Maybe it's just me » Sabina, posted by Dinah on June 19, 2003, at 18:11:17
I completely feel like an outsider. I have always felt that way in my life, as through I stand out and everyone notices the womyn on the outside of the party.
Here I feel like an outsider also. It just seems like people are not talking when I need them too. They seem to answer other people, I don't know.
BUT the time I really needed someone to get me out of the black hole... everyone here was there for me. That is what made me choose to stay posting. Now that I am sorta on the mend, I hope to help someone else.
> I know the outsider feeling. Do you ever stand in a group of people, in a social or nonsocial setting, and feel like not only do you not fit in with them, but they seem to be in another dimension or somehow miles away? I feel that so often, and the feeling reaches back to at least kindergarten. I know it's probably an anxiety thing, derealization or depersonalization or something. It stinks.
>
> I'm glad to have here too.
Posted by Dinah on June 20, 2003, at 13:09:23
In reply to Maybe it's just me, posted by Dinah on June 19, 2003, at 16:05:55
The stuff I was picking up on really was real, and not a figment of my imagination. It doesn't really matter to me the whys or wherefores as much as the fact that I'm not imagining things that aren't there.
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20030508/msgs/235444.html
I hope he/she feels better soon, and I'm sorry I didn't reach out a hand to the posts. I was just too confused and was wondering about what was real too much.
Posted by Dinah on June 20, 2003, at 13:11:37
In reply to Re: Maybe it's just me, posted by giget on June 20, 2003, at 11:26:28
I'm sorry you feel that way, Giget. But it's such a common feeling that I'm sure it has to be part of the way the message board system works rather than anything personal to you.
Why don't we start an introductions thread for all the new people, and lots of the old people to tell as much or as little as they like about themselves and we can all start over again?
Posted by kalyb on June 20, 2003, at 13:33:32
In reply to Re: Maybe it's just me » kalyb, posted by Dinah on June 19, 2003, at 16:34:27
> It's the posts that seem to be hinting that certain posters understand what other posters are saying, or know who they are, or things like that. Even in the cases where I can pretty easily guess what's going on. Because then I feel like I need to be very careful in what I say so as not to give away what I think I might know.
-------------------------I've only been here for 6 weeks, and at first I glanced at the PB Social board and thought that everyone knew everyone else. It was daunting. I stuck to reading about meds on PB instead.
Then I started reading more Social posts. I can't remember what my first post was, but it might have been someone with a problem that I totally empathised with. So I posted. Then I got frustrated with things and posted a vent/rant and got masses of sympathy. I realised that here is the one place on earth and cyberspace where there are people who understand.
I feel safe here. I feel I can let my imagination run riot if I like. I can reveal my feelings. I can rant. I can hug. I can dredge up pearls of wisdom I didn't know I had and see them please someone who is hurting, which in turn makes me happy and feel valued. I can speak to total strangers here without fear of rejection. I can even tease without fear of it backfiring.
I guess I've got to the point where I value this board so much, and find it so helpful, that I no longer see it as a private party or a clique. All social groups, societies, clubs and gatherings have cliques anyway, and to outsiders they always look closer and more buddy-buddy than they are on the inside. You either let that bother you, or you join one of your own and enjoy just being there, and it's good to remember to look out for newcomers staring at you, afraid of your clique, thinking they've walked into the wrong party - extend a hand of welcome if you can.
Kalyb xx
Posted by Tabitha on June 20, 2003, at 14:37:11
In reply to Re: Well, at least I'm not crazy, posted by Dinah on June 20, 2003, at 13:09:23
now that's strange. I was convinced I knew ALS as someone else.. but not a 'she'.
funny, I was thinking of changing my name too.. but I'd tell everybody. clean underwear indeed.
Tabitha was the name of my first cat, but it's also the name of a corny soap-opera character. I fear the tacky association.
Posted by giget on June 20, 2003, at 14:52:32
In reply to Re: Maybe it's just me » giget, posted by Dinah on June 20, 2003, at 13:11:37
That is ok.. it is life.
I only have internet at work, so I will be gone all weekend, but if you start a thred I will surely be there on Monday morning... 7:45am.
I think it would be good to get to know people!
Thanks
> I'm sorry you feel that way, Giget. But it's such a common feeling that I'm sure it has to be part of the way the message board system works rather than anything personal to you.
>
> Why don't we start an introductions thread for all the new people, and lots of the old people to tell as much or as little as they like about themselves and we can all start over again?
Posted by Zo on June 20, 2003, at 19:51:20
In reply to Maybe it's just me, posted by Dinah on June 19, 2003, at 16:05:55
Dinah,
Would you email me at zo19 at yahoo dot com ? I've got some personal information for you.
Warmly,
Zo
Posted by OddipusRex on June 20, 2003, at 20:14:59
In reply to Re: Maybe it's just me » Dinah, posted by Zo on June 20, 2003, at 19:51:20
Posted by OddipusRex on June 20, 2003, at 20:16:08
In reply to deja vieu jr hi (nm), posted by OddipusRex on June 20, 2003, at 20:14:59
Posted by OddipusRex on June 20, 2003, at 20:17:44
In reply to deja vieu jr hi (nm), posted by OddipusRex on June 20, 2003, at 20:14:59
Posted by OddipusRex on June 20, 2003, at 20:19:31
In reply to Is Zo zenhussy? (nm), posted by OddipusRex on June 20, 2003, at 20:16:08
Posted by OddipusRex on June 20, 2003, at 20:21:54
In reply to is melodrama fun? (nm), posted by OddipusRex on June 20, 2003, at 20:19:31
Posted by Dinah on June 20, 2003, at 20:22:34
In reply to Is Zo zenhussy? (nm), posted by OddipusRex on June 20, 2003, at 20:16:08
Posted by Dinah on June 20, 2003, at 20:22:59
In reply to deja vieu jr hi (nm), posted by OddipusRex on June 20, 2003, at 20:14:59
Posted by OddipusRex on June 20, 2003, at 20:22:59
In reply to is melodrama fun? (nm), posted by OddipusRex on June 20, 2003, at 20:19:31
Posted by Dinah on June 20, 2003, at 20:23:29
In reply to is melodrama fun? (nm), posted by OddipusRex on June 20, 2003, at 20:19:31
Posted by Dinah on June 20, 2003, at 20:24:46
In reply to I'm out with the out group (nm), posted by OddipusRex on June 20, 2003, at 20:21:54
We in the out group prefer to think of it as the alternate clique. :)))
(Just kidding guys)
Posted by OddipusRex on June 20, 2003, at 20:25:06
In reply to Re: is melodrama fun? No, it's not. (nm) » OddipusRex, posted by Dinah on June 20, 2003, at 20:23:29
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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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