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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 11 to 35 of 35. Go back in thread:
Posted by beardedlady on April 7, 2003, at 7:50:12
In reply to Re: The endless mess to Noa, posted by coral on April 6, 2003, at 19:59:14
I have meant to ask before. What is your WH? Wicked Husband? Whore Hound? Wart Hog? Wayward Ho? Wiley Heifer? Weasel Head? Wife Husband?
I just can't get it. Help?
beardy : )>
Posted by beardedlady on April 7, 2003, at 7:57:55
In reply to The endless mess, posted by noa on April 6, 2003, at 19:21:15
Noa:
You are making great strides, and I think it's wonderful. It was a sunny day yesterday, indeed, and I was inside, too, grading 13 research papers for about six hours. I WISH I had been able to get as much housework done as you did! So think of it: you're actually a role model for others!
My basement was a wall-to-wall mess. Everything we didn't want was down there with the stuff we wouldn't but couldn't find a place for. And all the toys were in the living room.
So I hired this lady on the internet--Absolutely Organized, in case you're in my area. Before she came, I was motivated enough to start, but she had excellent ideas. She even brings storage containers if you need them. I think the first hour was $50, the first day was--can't remember--$150? We got enough done that first day to finish it all, have our walls built, our floors put in. Now I have a mosaic workshop, and my daughter has a playroom. And it's still clean and organized, thanks to this woman, who was only there once. The lessons about cleaning, though pretty obvious, were lasting.
Maybe you can consider that?
Reminds me. I have to call and have my dishwasher repaired. We only use it to drain the sink-washed dishes, but it has to be run once in awhile, or it starts to stink!
beardy : )>
Posted by coral on April 7, 2003, at 8:01:56
In reply to I am slow. » coral, posted by beardedlady on April 7, 2003, at 7:50:12
Dear Beardy,
LOL WH stands for Wonderful Husband!!!
It's a reference that comes from the days of Lumptonia.
Coral
Posted by beardedlady on April 7, 2003, at 8:10:49
In reply to Re: I am slow., posted by coral on April 7, 2003, at 8:01:56
But LOL back. This was pretty funny. http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20001031/msgs/2113.html
I guess I should call mine a WH, too, for being so supportive. But most of the time I refer to him as MA (My A**hole)!
(Really, honey, I love you bunches. It's all in fun.)
beardy : )>
Posted by WorryGirl on April 7, 2003, at 9:55:22
In reply to The endless mess, posted by noa on April 6, 2003, at 19:21:15
Knowing there are so many others with dirty or cluttered houses out there comforts me.
When I decide to clean it's usually one particular thing that consumes me for almost the entire day. Like yesterday I actually got down on my hands and knees and scrubbed every tile on our outdoor foyer. Everything else was left undone.I don't like company because making the place look presentable keeps me up for hours and hours, and by that time I'm exhausted and miserable and the place still doesn't meet my standards.
Before I had kids....
My house was immaculate.
There were no piles (maybe a few in the bedroom)
I vacuumed daily, etc. etc. etc.Now...
My friend stopped leaving her 2 year old at my house for an hour a week and never said why - could it be that my sorry attempts at making my place presentable failed? Her place is always immaculate. She is immaculate. Something I'll never be, at least til the kids get older.
I hate that. I'm a perfectionist at heart.I'm lucky if I dust once every two months.
If I vacuum once a week.
There are piles everywhere.
Continuous crumbs all over the floor
I'm good friends with the pest control guy.
I swear I'm not a lazy person.
How did this happen?
Posted by judy1 on April 7, 2003, at 12:27:17
In reply to Re: The endless mess » noa, posted by beardedlady on April 7, 2003, at 7:57:55
Noa,
I really admire how much you've already done. I'm a HGTV junkie and marvel at what people on that week-end warrior show get accomplished. i thought bearded lady's suggestion about hiring an organizer was excellent, i know several people who have used them with great success. and i absolutely agree with your therapist's observation that kids keep you organized- it's true out of necessity. best of luck-judy
Posted by WorryGirl on April 7, 2003, at 14:00:40
In reply to Re: The endless mess, posted by judy1 on April 7, 2003, at 12:27:17
>i thought bearded lady's suggestion about hiring an organizer was excellent, i know several people who have used them with great success. and i absolutely agree with your therapist's observation that kids keep you organized- it's true out of necessity. best of luck-judy
Good advice -
Having kids HAS forced me to get rid of a lot of stuff out of necessity. As for the organization, I need lots and lots of continuous time for that, then maybe I can at least maintain my household. I guess that's where the professional organizer will come in handy.
Posted by coral on April 7, 2003, at 14:29:54
In reply to The endless mess, posted by noa on April 6, 2003, at 19:21:15
One of my favorite books for organizing is "Clutter's Last Stand" Sorry, I don't recall the author. It did WONDERS for me.
Imagine what I was like BEFORE I read it LOL :::::shuddering:::: Be afraid. Be very afraid. :)
Coral
Posted by coral on April 7, 2003, at 14:54:03
In reply to Re: The endless mess -- a book, posted by coral on April 7, 2003, at 14:29:54
Hrmph! Reading the headings, it appears that I have been identified as being slow. And, in fact, it seems that I even identified myself as being slow. I must stop doing that!
Yes, I'm slow at cleaning - that should be S L O W
Yes, I'm slow at math. 2 + 2 ALWAYS equals 4? How interesting.
Yes, I'm slow at finances. "I can't be out of money because I'm not out of checks!"
Wait a minute...this line of reasoning isn't helping my cause! Guess I was slow to catch on to that! LOL
Coral
Posted by Tabitha on April 7, 2003, at 14:59:03
In reply to Re: The endless mess -- a book, posted by coral on April 7, 2003, at 14:29:54
I loved that book. Mind you, I'd mostly just lie about on the sofa, in the midst of all the mess, and get vaguely inspired about throwing stuff out, rather than actually doing anything.. but I spent many hours of pleasant reverie reading it nonetheless.
Posted by WorryGirl on April 7, 2003, at 15:02:30
In reply to Re: The endless mess to Noa Coral, posted by noa on April 6, 2003, at 22:00:28
> I guess it does make me appreciate my own mom. How the heck did she do it? We did have some cleaning help--every 2 weeks, she had a woman clean the place. But it was one of those strange situations where it was actually more work for my mom in some ways. The cleaning lady was developmentally disabled. My mom's friend was an advocate in a special program to employ disabled adults, and had all her friends hire this woman.
This reminded me of my experience of hiring a cleaning person last spring when my 2nd child was only a few months old. But it, too, ended up being more work because for one, I almost spent more time making my place look presentable than she did cleaning it. I left the heavy-duty bathroom cleaning and floors to her, but boy was I paranoid about my clutter all over the place!
Than, unfortunately, small items began disappearing. At first, I thought, well, if she needs it that badly she can have it. But when half of my baby's outfits had disappeared I let her go. Besides, after several cleaning sessions she started using some kind of stinky cleaner that actually made the bathroom smell worse.I don't know how my mother did it either. She always kept our house spotless. She didn't do much else, though, including really supervising us kids. Back then we played outdoors all day with her periodically watching from the window. These days you would be reported for child neglect/negligence for doing that. My mother wasn't the only one - all of my friends played outside while their mothers stayed inside and cooked and cleaned.
It's always fun trying to cook from scratch with 2 fussy toddlers at your feet. Thank God for Homestyle Bake meals and deli desserts!
Posted by noa on April 7, 2003, at 20:18:46
In reply to Re: The endless mess - Noa, posted by BekkaH on April 7, 2003, at 0:01:18
Hi, Bekka, thanks for the suggestions. They make sense. I "know" these things, but have a hard time putting them into action. It is so great that you've been successful doing that. But it helps to hear it from someone else, to remind me.
BTW, I've been using paper and plastic a lot in recent months. Yes, I feel bad about it in terms of environment, but it is the only way for me to cope sometimes.
Thanks for the encouragment.
Posted by noa on April 7, 2003, at 20:20:37
In reply to P.S. One more thought - Noa, posted by BekkaH on April 7, 2003, at 0:47:54
The previous message was for you, too, Bekka.
Yes, I've thought about this and asked my pdoc. That is one reason he and I are planning to lower my effexor dose a bit, now that the fish oil seems to be helping a lot.
Posted by noa on April 7, 2003, at 20:23:34
In reply to Re: The endless mess » noa, posted by Tabitha on April 7, 2003, at 1:04:34
>>You know what I managed today? I ran my hand around the edges of one room and picked up all the dustbunnies (mostly my own hair from all the med-induced shedding).
Hey, don't minimize that! That is what I haven't done yet in my apt.! What is it they say about bunnies multiplying? Does it apply to dust bunnies? Yes, and I am always shocked by how much of my own hair there is all over the place!! I've thought that to be med related too!
Posted by noa on April 7, 2003, at 20:26:05
In reply to Re: The endless mess » noa, posted by beardedlady on April 7, 2003, at 7:57:55
Wow, a personal organizer professional--that actually sounds great! Only right now it will have to wait until after I pay for the washing machine and the diswasher! Thanks.
Posted by noa on April 7, 2003, at 20:31:05
In reply to I am post-Lumptonial. » coral, posted by beardedlady on April 7, 2003, at 8:10:49
He He--I'd forgotten about that--it was pretty amusing, now, wasn't it?
Posted by noa on April 7, 2003, at 20:33:09
In reply to NOW, wait a minute . . ., posted by coral on April 7, 2003, at 14:54:03
YOu crack me up!
Posted by noa on April 7, 2003, at 20:38:43
In reply to Re: The endless mess to Noa Coral » noa, posted by WorryGirl on April 7, 2003, at 15:02:30
True--times have changed. There are lots of things we did as kids that parents would be reported for nowadays. We also had hours of outside time to explore. It was fun. My brother and I liked to explore the "swamp", a wetlands nearby that was deep and mysterious to us. It has since been "managed", ie, the water channeled in pipes to prevent the flooding that used to occur regularly. What is that song--"They paved Paradis and put up a Parking Lot"?
I don't blame you for firing the cleaning person if your stuff was going missing!
I have a friend who has a cleaner every 2 weeks. She finds that knowing the cleaners are coming keeps her messiness in check because she does need to do a bit of tidying up (ie, putting things away) before they come over. She says it is a good balance. They clean thoroughly (enough) and knowing they are coming gets her to keep things in control.
Posted by noa on April 7, 2003, at 20:39:34
In reply to Re: The endless mess » noa, posted by Tabitha on April 7, 2003, at 1:04:34
I'm not freaking yet, but I will be! I've had to file an extension every year for the past 3.
Posted by Dinah on April 7, 2003, at 20:40:17
In reply to Re: The endless mess » Tabitha, posted by noa on April 7, 2003, at 20:23:34
Wow. I'm lucky. I can blame the hair on the dogs. I always know it's time to sweep when I can count a few more dogs than I actually own.
Posted by noa on April 7, 2003, at 20:41:43
In reply to Re: The endless mess, posted by judy1 on April 7, 2003, at 12:27:17
Judy, that kind of show sounds great! I don't have cable. If I did, I'd probably watch all those HG shows.
My friend made me watch Trading Spaces--she's addicted to it! I liked it, although I thought some of the designers' ideas were rather unappealing!
Posted by noa on April 7, 2003, at 20:47:30
In reply to Re: The endless mess to Noa Coral » noa, posted by WorryGirl on April 7, 2003, at 15:02:30
I really appreciate all the support! It really helps!
Last night and this evening, I benefitted from having my kitchen counters, sink and range top clean. I actually prepared food myself--not in the microwave, but cooked in a real pot on the stove. It had been a loooonngg time. Nothing major, just some pasta, and sauce from a can, and today, I was a bit more elaborate--I actually chopped an onion and some fresh basil (went shopping today, too) and made some couscous. I stocked up today on plastic ware and paper plates and bowls, and cups. Eventually, I'll buy some real stuff, but for now it will be enough to keep up with washing the pots, etc. (Baby steps, Baby steps, right?)
OF course, I still have done nothing toward finding all the papers and cleaning off the table int he kitchen, or sweeping up the dust bunnies or the crumbs, etc. on the kitchen floor. Oh well.....
Posted by bozeman on April 7, 2003, at 23:30:18
In reply to Re: Thanks Everyone!, posted by noa on April 7, 2003, at 20:47:30
Oh, noa, you are so not alone in your cleaning situation. I call mine "analysis paralysis", something I borrowed from a class I took in college: "Hmm, should I sort this pile, clean the bathroom, fold the laundry, or (since it's March) put away the Halloween decorations? . . . can't decide . . . I think I'll clean the catbox." So the first four remain un-done (but the kitties are happy. :-)
If I didn't have a roommate, I don't know if I'd be able to walk through the house or not. Probably not. But even when I'm at my worst, I feel guilty/anxious enough to keep my part somewhat sort-of livable so she doesn't have to deal with it. Since this is the woman who came over to my apartment six years ago when I had a 104 F fever (kidneystones) and wordlessly washed every dish in the house, made me three different kinds of jello (the only thing I could keep down, and I haven't had it since), and telephoned to nag me into taking my medicine every night, all after working a 12 hour day (five days a week, with another job of two-eight hour days on weekends.) Oh, and driving nearly an hour one-way to get to my place. This is after she was up all night taking me to the emergency room in the first place. She thought it was the coolest thing when I got this place and there was room for both of us, so she could quit that nasty second job, plus was a half-hour closer to her other job; then she got a better job, and only works eight or nine hours a day, so she thinks this is a terrific deal, here. Little does she know what a disaster my life would be without her to add some barometer of order to it.
I hope the appliance "fairies" are kinder to you than they have been of late. Maybe the washer repair tech will be cute and fun? For conversation if nothing else? My sister swears the cable guy was hitting on me, and maybe he was, but I was just too stressed to notice. But he was actually very cool, I should have paid more attention. :-D
Cheers and hoorays on your kitchen progress . . . from one of your stress-makes-me-organizationally-challenged sisters
bozeman
PS I was thinking the other day . . . my house always used to be spotless. Until I got sick a few years ago, that is. Where have those days gone . . . . . or did they even exist? Maybe I dreamed them. <chuckle>
Posted by Dr. Bob on April 8, 2003, at 0:01:33
In reply to Re: The endless mess -- a book, posted by coral on April 7, 2003, at 14:29:54
> One of my favorite books for organizing is "Clutter's Last Stand"
I'd just like to plug the double double quotes feature at this site:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#amazon
The first time anyone refers to a book without using this option, I post this to try to make sure he or she at least knows about it. It's just an option, though, and doesn't *have* to be used. If people *choose* not to use it, I'd be interested why not, but I'd like that redirected to Psycho-Babble Administration:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20020918/msgs/7717.html
Thanks!
Bob
Posted by noa on April 8, 2003, at 19:46:38
In reply to Re: Thanks Everyone!, posted by bozeman on April 7, 2003, at 23:30:18
What an amazing friend you have!
LOL about the repair guy. Actually, the electrician that did some work here was kinda nice.
Your kitty litter story reminded me of how clean my place always was when I was a full time student. Here is how that one works: Defrosting the freezer is an amazing way to avoid studying for a final exam.
This is the end of the thread.
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