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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 7 of 7. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Alara on November 3, 2002, at 23:47:54
Hi everyone,
This is extremely hard for me to talk about since I feel ashamed of myself, but I was hoping that some of you may understand something about what I am about to say:
Several years ago I struggled with anorexia and, later, with depression, anxiety and excessive alcohol use. It seemed to be triggered off by a combination of my grandmother's death and my leaving home at a very late age (26). Well, I went through 4 years of therapy and (later) antidepressants and I believe that I have made a good recovery, although I still have a little way to go.
Around three years ago I was made redundant from my permanent job and I was surviving on temp/contract work but somewhere along the line I lost all motivation to get out of bed and get to work on time. I would often call in sick. As a result, I lost a string of jobs and now I have a very poor track record. I am very ashamed to admit that I have not been a very reliable person during the last few years.I am now under a tremendous amount of pressure to get full-time work so that I can support myself, but my work history is now so patchy that I can't seem to get my foot in the door. If truth be known, I still have tremendous difficulty getting out of bed. (Believe me, meds only make it worse, so they're out of the question.) It seems that sleeping protects me from the stress somehow. Once that alarm goes off, my blood pressure sores my stomach starts to churn. I dread the anxiety that the day will bring. I also
find it difficult to cope with the social stress and the noise created by the working environment.Has anyone here been through a similar experience? How did you rehabilitate yourself? I guess these are very difficult questions to answer but I would be very grateful for any insight.
Posted by GeekUKII on November 4, 2002, at 18:51:13
In reply to Getting Back into the Workforce, posted by Alara on November 3, 2002, at 23:47:54
It is hard to get yourself into work life after feeling so bad for so long. I am not at all a success story, but I am keeping my head above water. The best advise I can give ( and is cheesy), is to take each day as it comes. Do what you can and I am sure it will suprise you. If you are able to work now then dont berate yourself too much for the past, it was the past and has no relevance to the future. If others dont see that then you have to show them. I am a temp at the moment but a good temp, and I take comfort in that. It sound like stress is a problem. Look at your day and look at the people round you. are your REALLY doing that much worse than the others in your work? I am sure you do ok, if not well. People will respect you for that.
hope it helps
M
Posted by IsoM on November 4, 2002, at 19:29:01
In reply to Getting Back into the Workforce, posted by Alara on November 3, 2002, at 23:47:54
Alara, what helped me might not help you but I'll suggest it anyway.
Here in Canada, there's lots of agencies that work for the government, helping people to join the work force. They're free, paid by the government. Some are better than others.
It's not that you're new to working & neither was I, but the 2-3 week course gets you out of the house each day to be there. It mixes you with other people all focusing on finding jobs. It'll help build your confidence in writing resumes, doing interviews, & learning of any workplace legal changes that might have been enacted since you last worked.
Most of these places have computers too that will teach some computer skills if lacking. There's also sites & links to jobs advertised that we don't always know about.
It's not like you'll learn that much new but it helps psyche you up for working again, mentally preparing you. You might even connect with someone there who'll help you in a job different than you expected to get.
Also, keep your mind open to making money in other ways. Is there anything you're good at & really like? Sometimes these things we think of as just interests or hobbies can be parlayed into giving us some extra income. If you can't think of anything, ask at the job preparation place. They may point you to leads.
Posted by Alara on November 5, 2002, at 19:49:54
In reply to Re: Getting Back into the Workforce, posted by GeekUKII on November 4, 2002, at 18:51:13
Thanks, Geek. I should stop beating myself up about my past, it's true. A lot of the stress comes from comparing myself to other people. I did very well at school and university but have never found a successful career..So when I look around me, I see a world full of people who are `better than me'...I then put extra pressure on myself to appear perfect and, of course, I always fall short...That's where the anxiety comes in...It builds up and, WHAM, I'm feeling too depressed to go to work!
What you are suggesting makes a lot of sense: I just have to find a way of getting those attitudes into my thick head without listening to the little voice that says "Well, you're ONLY doing data entry or reception and you're not even perfect at that..." Crazy logic, huh!
Posted by Alara on November 5, 2002, at 19:53:07
In reply to Re: Getting Back into the Workforce » Alara, posted by IsoM on November 4, 2002, at 19:29:01
Thanks for that, Iso. We do have similar programs in Australia; I think you just need to register for welfare to get into them. At the rate these job offers are coming in, I'll be eligible soon.
Posted by jay on November 5, 2002, at 21:44:11
In reply to Getting Back into the Workforce, posted by Alara on November 3, 2002, at 23:47:54
Alara....you are far from being alone in your situation. It is so common, it is just damn sad employers and the government don't do anything about it. I started up an internet newsletter devoted to mental health and work..but my depression and apathy let it slide. (Geezz..what a coincidence, eh?..heh.)
I've ploughed through tons of research and books on the subject, and the scariest co-relation was between lack of work, poverty, and mental illness. But....there is hope. It appears you may have to work at first on both reducing your symptoms (through which ever way...medication, therapy, etc..), because looking for, AND working, are very, very stressful. Try to keep up the daily task of looking for work (even if it is just mailing out *one* cover letter and resume a day)..and you may already be off to a good start.
The *other* main problem, though, as you have experienced, is finding quality employment. There are, however, a few things you may likely have to do also to get it. I draw this not only from my own research, but from my own experience.
1) To get your foot back in the door, you may have to take a low-paying, meaningless job to start. The economy *sucks* so bad, because of the greedy corporations and stupid politicians, it's unfortunately what we have to do. BUT...keep in mind it is temporary (See next step.)
2)Do some MAJOR career research. This likely means going to a local 'unemployment center' or some kind of government funded career workshop and getting your resume in tip-top shape...and it will assist you with the next step. A good 'job coach' has specific knowledge of many things many of us would likely overlook.
3) Find an area that you are quite sure you would like and would do well in, and that pay's a fairly decent salary. This will likely require some kind of college or training upgrade, and thus can help keep you motivated to keep your 'temp' job (above). I would highly suggest a college program that has some kind of experiential or co-op option, and research the graduation success rates and starting salaries.
Well...that's about the best I have to offer. I am not only in the process of doing the above right now, I've been on the other end of the table as both a career counsellor and social worker. I don't mean to come across as if I have all the answers, but just want to share some general strategies that will likely make you most successful. (Both inside and out..)
Good luck..and keep coming back for support, questions, frustrations..etc. I know this again doesn't make it easier...but you are not alone. Far from it.
Jay
p.s. if you want to email me for support...just let me know..and I will post my email addy.
Posted by Alara on November 6, 2002, at 1:15:03
In reply to Re: Getting Back into the Workforce..pls READ! » Alara, posted by jay on November 5, 2002, at 21:44:11
> "Alara....you are far from being alone in your situation. It is so common, it is just damn sad employers and the government don't do anything about it. I started up an internet newsletter devoted to mental health and work..but my depression and apathy let it slide. (Geezz..what a coincidence, eh?..heh.)"
>
Thank you so much, Jay, for taking the trouble to write down all these ideas. Just reading your post (and Geek's and Iso's posts) has already made me feel so much less deficient and alone. :-)
I'm sorry that your depression got bad enough to let your newsletter slide. Think of it as a temporary barrier: You obviously have the passion, the knowledge and determination to ensure that it will eventually succeed. :-)>"I've ploughed through tons of research and books on the subject, and the scariest co-relation was between lack of work, poverty, and mental illness."
Yeah, once we get locked into that cycle it can be very hard to get out of it.
"But....there is hope. It appears you may have to work at first on both reducing your symptoms (through which ever way...medication, therapy, etc..), because looking for, AND working, are very, very stressful. Try to keep up the daily task of looking for work (even if it is just mailing out *one* cover letter and resume a day)..and you may already be off to a good start."
Well, I've been working on reducing my symptoms the natural way for a couple of months ago and I am making some sure but steady progress. My approach to job hunting is a little more haphazard: I'll go for weeks without making any applications and then all of a sudden I'll apply for 10 jobs a day. lol.
>
> "The *other* main problem, though, as you have experienced, is finding quality employment. There are, however, a few things you may likely have to do also to get it. I draw this not only from my own research, but from my own experience."
>
Yes, this is what frightens me about using government programs which aim to get people back into the workforce. I suspect that a lot of the
placements organised by these government agencies are very low paying. (The participating employers, looking for government subsidies, look for people on the cheap and figure that anyone who is trying to re-enter the workforce would be grateful for ANY job, regardless of whether it pays enough to cover the bills.)>" 1) To get your foot back in the door, you may have to take a low-paying, meaningless job to start. The economy *sucks* so bad, because of the greedy corporations and stupid politicians, it's unfortunately what we have to do. BUT...keep in mind it is temporary (See next step.)
>
> 2)Do some MAJOR career research. This likely means going to a local 'unemployment center' or some kind of government funded career workshop and getting your resume in tip-top shape...and it will assist you with the next step. A good 'job coach' has specific knowledge of many things many of us would likely overlook.
>
> 3) Find an area that you are quite sure you would like and would do well in, and that pay's a fairly decent salary. This will likely require some kind of college or training upgrade, and thus can help keep you motivated to keep your 'temp' job (above). I would highly suggest a college program that has some kind of experiential or co-op option, and research the graduation success rates and starting salaries."
>
(Sigh.) I completed a university degree in Psychology and English Lit 12 years ago, but it doesn't seem to count. My predicament is that I am a serious part-time music student; music is my therapy! If I am working full-time and getting another education, I am going to have to give up my music. This is selfish, I know, but music means so much to me!> "Well...that's about the best I have to offer. I am not only in the process of doing the above right now, I've been on the other end of the table as both a career counsellor and social worker. I don't mean to come across as if I have all the answers, but just want to share some general strategies that will likely make you most successful. (Both inside and out..)"
Of course you don't come across in that way. Thanks, Jay. You have given me some good, much needed advice. :-)
>
> "Good luck..and keep coming back for support, questions, frustrations..etc. I know this again doesn't make it easier...but you are not alone. Far from it.
>
> Jay
>
> p.s. if you want to email me for support...just let me know..and I will post my email addy."THANK YOU!
This is the end of the thread.
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