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Posted by Phil on August 4, 2002, at 10:09:33
In reply to For all those expats...., posted by alii on August 4, 2002, at 3:53:15
Hope the rest of us aren't dumb, mean, and heartless.
You can make a statement by leaving in protest but you can't make a difference.
Posted by judy1 on August 4, 2002, at 12:01:11
In reply to Re: For all those expats.... » alii, posted by Phil on August 4, 2002, at 10:09:33
You can make a statement by leaving in protest but you can't make a difference.
I couldn't have written it better :-). And Alii, I apologize for never really 'meeting' you. If you have problems with SI (like Dinah suggested), please post here and let our group of fellow sufferers help. Take care, judy
Posted by alii on August 4, 2002, at 13:34:01
In reply to For all those expats...., posted by alii on August 4, 2002, at 3:53:15
Just a quick note for the SPOWers of the boards..... Not everything written is directed at you or is about you. I think it would be advantageous for everyone to maintain some distance from the occasional flare ups of mental illness that at times overwhelm some members of this board (and to clarify ---right now that would be me). Snarky comments do not get anyone anywhere.
Posted by Phil on August 4, 2002, at 13:53:41
In reply to Remember SPOWers.....it's not all about you, posted by alii on August 4, 2002, at 13:34:01
Posted by Dinah on August 4, 2002, at 14:01:07
In reply to Remember SPOWers.....it's not all about you, posted by alii on August 4, 2002, at 13:34:01
I'm sorry Alii. I know you're in pain and I tried to express that knowledge in my post to you. And I tried to express concern for you as well.
But I just looked up snarky in the dictionary, and I must say I'm hurt, twice in one day. And I'm not going to apologize for saying I'm hurt.
Posted by Phil on August 4, 2002, at 14:16:33
In reply to Remember SPOWers.....it's not all about you, posted by alii on August 4, 2002, at 13:34:01
I think I just asked a question and made a comment. If you want to see me get snarky, I have been recently.
I also didn't think it was all about me. I asked if the rest of the posters on the board were being labelled.
Still don't know what a SPOWer is?We lost some good people; I wish they were back but they are the one's that left. It's their decision, water under the bridge.
Posted by Dinah on August 4, 2002, at 14:19:29
In reply to Snarky? » alii, posted by Phil on August 4, 2002, at 14:16:33
Posted by kid_A on August 4, 2002, at 14:33:34
In reply to Snarky? » alii, posted by Phil on August 4, 2002, at 14:16:33
Okay, lets look at the original post... re: someones opininion on the depth of this board, or whathaveyou... it really doesnt matter what is said, it's not relevant.Someone can make a generalised statement without needing to clarify every little instance of exception... Maybe that exception isn't implied or maybe its dificult to discern that, but then again, that was clarified later, by saying that we should take these posts with a grain of salt...
I used to go through life thinking every laugh was one in my direction, I know its hard to pry yourself out of that mold, but sometimes, especially in an electronic forum where it is difficult to intone exact meaning into every line of written text its easy to project more than is actually there into any statement...
that's all...
and honestly, I'm NOT trying to be Snarky with anyone...
Posted by Phil on August 4, 2002, at 14:51:22
In reply to ....sigh, yes... Snarky..., posted by kid_A on August 4, 2002, at 14:33:34
I guess alii isn't feeling good, either. That's more important.
But I am going to make bumper stickers.------SPOWER POWER------
Posted by Gabbi on August 4, 2002, at 15:11:08
In reply to I don't feel snarked on, you're right kid_A, posted by Phil on August 4, 2002, at 14:51:22
I'm not trying to stir things up, Kid_A I think your response was really grounding. I have exhausted myself many times trying to find a way to put something, that won't have anything negative read into it,which is impossible because I know if I'm in a senstive frame of mind I'll find hurt anywhere.
But saying intelligence caring has disappeared, doesn't really leave room for any implied exception. Disappear is an absolute. Its not like saying I miss the way things used to be.
Perhaps I'm splitting hairs, but I can understand why people got hurt.
Posted by kid_A on August 4, 2002, at 15:33:34
In reply to Re: I don't feel snarked on, you're right kid_A, posted by Gabbi on August 4, 2002, at 15:11:08
> ...saying intelligence caring has disappeared, doesn't really leave room for any implied exception. Disappear is an absolute. Its not like saying I miss the way things used to be.
Well, would it help if the poster then later stated that prehaps she had been a bit caustic, and in such cases it would be best not to take such posts so personally, and then make the mistake of taking it one step futher by asuming the mode of the defender, when there is nothing to defend. even though in this particular medium of comminication, all the barbs may not be folded down when the period stops.
> Perhaps I'm splitting hairs, but I can understand why people got hurt.
I understand too, when no exceptions are implied, or perhaps some hyperbole is applied, it may be easy to feel as if the text was indeed naming names, though in truth it was not.
Posted by Gabbi on August 4, 2002, at 16:07:49
In reply to Re: I don't feel snarked on, you're right » Gabbi, posted by kid_A on August 4, 2002, at 15:33:34
You're just so darn reasonable. I've made this mistake before, I should know better.
Especially when I've seen absolutely vicious petty "scandals" occur at work among people who claim to have no illness at all.I worked in a group home and we actually had to call a staff meeting over whether or not we should be allowed to use the tupperware weiner container as a sandwich container for one of the clients lunches, I got called at home on my day off regarding this "issue"
Your point
is well taken.
Gabbi
Posted by alii on August 4, 2002, at 16:21:59
In reply to Re: I don't feel snarked on, you're right kid_A, posted by Gabbi on August 4, 2002, at 15:11:08
> I'm not trying to stir things up, Kid_A I think your response was really grounding. I have exhausted myself many times trying to find a way to put something, that won't have anything negative read into it,which is impossible because I know if I'm in a senstive frame of mind I'll find hurt anywhere.
> But saying intelligence caring has disappeared, doesn't really leave room for any implied exception. Disappear is an absolute. Its not like saying I miss the way things used to be.
> Perhaps I'm splitting hairs, but I can understand why people got hurt.
Gabbi,Not to make this any worse than it already is; my text in its whole was: "yet seemingly disappeared", which can be read in one of the following ways:
Seeming
- adj 1. apparent; appearing, **whether truly or falsely**, to be as specified; a
seeming advantage.
-n 2. appearance, esp. outward or deceptive appearance.
-adv seeminglyPerceptions of people with severe mental illness are not always accurate and many on this board (myself included) do not see things the same way. I hope that makes some sense in clarifying things..... but I do think, however kid made the most sense in his above post.
--a.
Posted by Gabbi on August 4, 2002, at 16:31:19
In reply to re: » Gabbi, posted by alii on August 4, 2002, at 16:21:59
And that was before I saw your post, I was impulsive, and feel hypocritical because I've said things very much like Kid_A has myself.
Sometimes the only reason I've managed to keep friends due to my impulsiveness is that I can admit when I'm wrong.(that was only about me)Gabbi
Posted by mair on August 4, 2002, at 16:54:57
In reply to For all those expats...., posted by alii on August 4, 2002, at 3:53:15
Are you sure they really left? I mean Iso, WEndy and KK were all recently blocked and Zo was too for a month, and now I noticed that beardy has just been blocked too.
Mair
Posted by Dr. Bob on August 4, 2002, at 21:51:01
In reply to Re: For all those expats.... » alii, posted by Phil on August 4, 2002, at 10:09:33
> Hope the rest of us aren't dumb, mean, and heartless.
>
> You can make a statement by leaving in protest but you can't make a difference.Your first sentence was fine, but I'm afraid your second could lead others to feel put down, so I'm going to block you from posting for a week.
Bob
Posted by Dr. Bob on August 4, 2002, at 21:52:38
In reply to Remember SPOWers.....it's not all about you, posted by alii on August 4, 2002, at 13:34:01
> Just a quick note for the SPOWers of the boards..... Snarky comments do not get anyone anywhere.
As I've been saying, please don't post anything that could lead others to feel accused or put down, thanks.
Bob
PS: Follow-ups regarding posting policies, and complaints about posts, should be redirected to Psycho-Babble Administration.
Posted by wendy b. on August 5, 2002, at 1:19:02
In reply to For all those expats...., posted by alii on August 4, 2002, at 3:53:15
Hi Alii,
I am wondering how you are doing? Please let me know, life was being tough on you. I was very down recently about several things; being blocked from here was one of them. It was difficult, if only because it's hard as a bipolar to be told to shut up, you know? Just makes us want to yell louder and longer and harder...
> Finding any safer spaces out there?Friends are e-mailing friends, that's about it... Nothing formal at all.
> Do smaller groups really give the diversity of assistance needed/wanted by the members?I am personally very well served by e-mailing friends. Cuts down on the extraneous stuff. If I want to read PSB (like now), I hop on over. For me, it's just a matter of rising above the levels of noise and confusion, and finding a quieter place. Life is complicated enough, and I think most people lack a sense of humor. (Meaning: most people everywhere, not just here...) We need to lighten up!
So you may find an ambiguity in the above. Even though I say I am trying to get to another "zone," and not care so much, it did upset me to be blocked. Not because I desperately want to post much here anymore - I usually don't want to. But I felt it was unwarranted and frivolous on Bob's part, and thus unfair.
"Fair is fowl, and fowl is fair..."
> And have y'all stopped lurking here?Obviously not! Lurking AND posting! So no one's left at all, you know. Just people getting fed up from time to time... Pretty normal, I guess.
> Just wondering...
>
> --missing the intelligence, kindness, and heart that has seemingly disappeared from hereMost of the people Mair mentions below aren't aren't starting threads (I don't think), so maybe the topics aren't suiting you. She and others you are missing all have the intelligence and sensitivity and humor to make the conversations here alive and meaningful; I'm glad to call them friends...
I'd love to have your e-mail, you can write to me at:
koleppski at yahoo dot com
IF you want to, no pressure, of course...
> -apocalyptic aliiThanks for checking in; I realize you weren't writing to me personally, but I wanted you to know we're listening.
All the best, Alii,
Wendy
Posted by alii on August 5, 2002, at 3:22:14
In reply to Re: For all those expats.... » alii, posted by wendy b. on August 5, 2002, at 1:19:02
I appreciate your answering the questions I posed in my original post. I'm a curious person and tossed out some questions.
Thank you for taking the time to answer them.--alii
>> I was very down recently about several things<<
I hope things are improving for you. With kindness your way.
Posted by trouble on August 5, 2002, at 10:58:56
In reply to For all those expats...., posted by alii on August 4, 2002, at 3:53:15
> Finding any safer spaces out there?
>
if you build it they will come, alii.
you have so much to say and give, you
really do bring the news, brilliant,
shining, looking at all of it, feeling
fearlessly, then putting yourself out
there.if anyone needs his/her own website, well
i'd pray about this, if you find the answers
that way.
i bet someone else around here could help
you get started, collaborations are fun and
keep you motivated.troublewaits is the best thing to happen to
me in my entire life (except my boyfriend of
course).
this place gave me my start, it can be seen
as a starting point for people who have something
to say.and as for lurking, i will always be around, as
long as the board and i exist, this is my
family, i don't let people in my life too easily, and once it happens, well, i can't lose another thing, no matter how ambivalent i am toward it.you take care,
robin>
> Just wondering...
>
> --missing the intelligence, kindness, and heart that has seemingly disappeared from here
>
> -apocalyptic alii
> (and just for the religious zealots: apocalyptic--presaging imminent disaster......not relating to biblical refs., so please no responses from religious texts.)
Posted by Dinah on August 5, 2002, at 11:58:20
In reply to Re: For all those expats...., posted by trouble on August 5, 2002, at 10:58:56
I've missed you and your way of seeing straight through to the heart of things.
Drop by now and then will you?
Posted by gabbi on August 6, 2002, at 0:35:19
In reply to humble thank you for » wendy b., posted by alii on August 5, 2002, at 3:22:14
I'm staying away from posting for a while, but I wanted to say, a humble thank-you from me too,
Your answer was beautiful,thoughtful and supportive. I learned a lot simply from reading it.
And In a previous letter you had written I had responded oversensitively and was far to new to have a grasp on what was going on, I hadn't even realized there were so many boards, and I spoke once again, too quickly.
I'll probably do it again too! but have learned when I am the neediest I am also the most reactive. Although I know your letter to Alii was simply to give your support to her, it meant a lot to me as well, just in a different way.Thanks Gabbi
Posted by paxvox on August 6, 2002, at 20:32:38
In reply to Re: For all those expats.... » alii, posted by .tabi.T.ha. on August 4, 2002, at 5:54:33
some of us were/are expats out of choice, while others out of lack of choice. I will withhold further editorial comment on this forum largely as the result of this conundrum.
as always I remain,
PAXVOX
Posted by alii on August 7, 2002, at 16:48:20
In reply to Re: For all those expats...., posted by paxvox on August 6, 2002, at 20:32:38
> some of us were/are expats out of choice, while others out of lack of choice. I will withhold further editorial comment on this forum largely as the result of this conundrum.
> as always I remain,
> PAXVOXPax,
I asked a fellow poster to forward my e-mail addy along to you since I would love to hear anything more you have to say. It is entirely up to you if you wish to respond to me. No pressure.
With utmost respect,
--Alii
Posted by alii on August 14, 2002, at 23:26:49
In reply to Re: For all those expats...., posted by trouble on August 5, 2002, at 10:58:56
> > Finding any safer spaces out there?
> >
> if you build it they will come, alii.
> you have so much to say and give, you
> really do bring the news, brilliant,
> shining, looking at all of it, feeling
> fearlessly, then putting yourself out
> there.
>
> if anyone needs his/her own website, well
> i'd pray about this, if you find the answers
> that way.
> i bet someone else around here could help
> you get started, collaborations are fun and
> keep you motivated.
>
> troublewaits is the best thing to happen to
> me in my entire life (except my boyfriend of
> course).
> this place gave me my start, it can be seen
> as a starting point for people who have something
> to say.
>
> and as for lurking, i will always be around, as
> long as the board and i exist, this is my
> family, i don't let people in my life too easily, and once it happens, well, i can't lose another thing, no matter how ambivalent i am toward it.
>
> you take care,
> robin
>
> >
> > Just wondering...
> >
> > --missing the intelligence, kindness, and heart that has seemingly disappeared from here
Hey Robin/Trouble,Woman, you just are too much for this site you popped up and were quickly 'escorted' off the experiment site again. Uh, ooohhkaaaay.
I follow what you've built. Flat out bitchin' babe. I'll get to that stage and let er all hang out and rip apart the inner shit that drive this insanity pills and trying to function and have a relationship and 'fufill' obligations when the only obligation I can muster some days is to hold on to one dear pact I've made to not opt out yet.
As for the advice about praying for a site.........honey I need prayer for dsl money! I have site size and pc speed and prescription clogged brain to muddle through some bad coding program to create my webmess. I just need connection speed to improve and soon I will get up and about out there........I'm no poet......can't remember music to save my soul so no competition there lady.
Lurk away you amazing spirit. Hot damn I can't believe this post of yerz didn't really catch my eye til now.
You work in mysterious ways.
--alii
This is the end of the thread.
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