Psycho-Babble Social Thread 19162

Shown: posts 1 to 7 of 7. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

civility manifesto

Posted by trouble on March 3, 2002, at 17:24:40

Hey y'all,

This is my present take on the civility policy:

When I first started readin PSB and saw *&%#$! substituted for letters in curse words I thought is was the sweetest and saddest thing I'd ever seen in my life.

Later, upon learning that this practice was linked to the blocking policy my reaction was,
wouldn't you know it, just when we think we're free and equal human beings here comes The Man to straighten our wig out.
It seemed a natural reaction, given that the curse words are instantly recognizable despite the * so its use defies logic. So what's it there for, if not a demonstration of power and authority.

Lou and others' emphasis on this being a big deal about out American heritage speaks to me. Crude irreverence may not be the best or most significant aspect of the American character, but it is the most fun. And we do it well, see H.L. Mencken, Jon Stewart, SeanPenn, Dorothy Parker, Don Rickles, David Letterman and Courtney Love, to name a few of my own favorites.

But non-compliance w/the PSB policy was never an option for me, so I dutifully "disguise" the naughty bits. Now every time I type an asterick into the eff word I am reminded that there are people in the world who are so different from me, that they could appreciate a gesture like this. It's such a small thing! How I can make someone react positively or negatively by how I go about something I didn't realize was anything to them one way or another! Hmmm... I still don't get it, but rather than arguing w/ it I feel a sense of wonder. My lack of understanding suggests that I am the one who has more to learn, not the other way around.

It's a seed planted, whether I know it or not, that I have an impact on my surroundings, and whether Dr. Bob intended that result or not, HIS rule has had an impact on ME, and it seems so nuanced and strangely connected, just imagine going around, doing good, w/out being particularly deliberate about it. I've been doing the opposite for so long I see no reason this other side can't become a new way of life, I really don't.

Anyway, I have read so very many theoretical posts about the civility policy that I'm becoming interested in hearing a more personal account from those who are so inclined.

Thanks, trouble

 

Re: civility manifesto

Posted by fi on March 4, 2002, at 7:55:42

In reply to civility manifesto, posted by trouble on March 3, 2002, at 17:24:40

I really dont see it as a big deal, tho I agree that using the *&$ stuff is transparent! I am more concerned about people being disrespectful of each other, and glad that is monitored. I've personally been surprised by the power of (very slight) negative feedback to me- its a bit like a stranger suddenly appearing in your living room and shouting at you!

I may be overly sensitive- dont know.

The other thing I am aware of is that Dr B's main role often seems to dealing with loads of posts challenging his policy. Which doesnt sound nearly as interesting as what he presumably does as his 'day job' as a pdoc. Hopefully, he continues to be prepared to do it anyway (I dont think I would be!) I sometimes wonder if we are missing out on his pdoc skills, but also feel confident that members of the Board seem to do a good job of replying to each other.

Does anyone know if there is a no-rules free for all Board on mental health somewhere? I would guess there is but dont know.

Apologies if this should have gone to PBA- feel free to move it, Dr B.

Fi

 

Re: civility manifesto

Posted by NikkiT2 on March 4, 2002, at 8:29:41

In reply to civility manifesto, posted by trouble on March 3, 2002, at 17:24:40

I respect and like Dr bob.. he has provided a place for us all which he did not need to.

I get very annoyed that he is constantly being attacked for his policies. Remember, this is HIS web site... if you ran this place, you would run it with YOUR policies.

if people don't like it why don't they go and set up their own board (which HAS been done by members here, and are very nice communities)

Nikki

 

Re: civility manifesto

Posted by trouble on March 4, 2002, at 12:30:31

In reply to Re: civility manifesto, posted by fi on March 4, 2002, at 7:55:42

> No Fi, an asterick is not a big deal, it was the symbolism I was alluding to, the mindset it represented. Boy one thing I'm learning is I am a lot less literal minded than most of the people I correspond w/on this board. Maybe that's one reason I'm considered "eccentric" out in the real world, I want people to look at things in a new way, but I don't want to spell anything out.
I can totally relate to your sense about people coming into your living room and shouting at you, I've been getting that feeling too, but so far it's been way more praise and encouragement than the odd character here and there having a bad day and looking for a fight. I do think that happens, I myself was premenstrual the other night and became hysterical over a feeling that certain posts of mine were'nt being regarded w/ sufficient awe, and the "problem" was real, but it was so EASY to lambaste people in my mind and call them mental midgets and so on that the next day I asked everyone to tell me what they looked like b/c I need to humanize this board if I'm gooing to keep from using it as a platform for my personality disorder.
Now that I'm putting faces, even celebrity faces on some of the others I can see them in my mind's eye when reading their thoughts and I hope it will make a difference.
I too have been wondering about a mental illness site that doesn't include arbitrary restrictions, just so I'll have a place to go when I've been blocked from here. If anyone knows of one please respond.

take care
trouble

> really dont see it as a big deal, tho I agree that using the *&$ stuff is transparent! I am more concerned about people being disrespectful of each other, and glad that is monitored. I've personally been surprised by the power of (very slight) negative feedback to me- its a bit like a stranger suddenly appearing in your living room and shouting at you!
>
> I may be overly sensitive- dont know.
>
> The other thing I am aware of is that Dr B's main role often seems to dealing with loads of posts challenging his policy. Which doesnt sound nearly as interesting as what he presumably does as his 'day job' as a pdoc. Hopefully, he continues to be prepared to do it anyway (I dont think I would be!) I sometimes wonder if we are missing out on his pdoc skills, but also feel confident that members of the Board seem to do a good job of replying to each other.
>
> Does anyone know if there is a no-rules free for all Board on mental health somewhere? I would guess there is but dont know.
>
> Apologies if this should have gone to PBA- feel free to move it, Dr B.
>
> Fi

 

Re: civility manifesto

Posted by trouble on March 4, 2002, at 12:47:54

In reply to Re: civility manifesto, posted by NikkiT2 on March 4, 2002, at 8:29:41

> I respect and like Dr bob.. he has provided a place for us all which he did not need to.
>
> I get very annoyed that he is constantly being attacked for his policies. Remember, this is HIS web site... if you ran this place, you would run it with YOUR policies.
>
> if people don't like it why don't they go and set up their own board (which HAS been done by members here, and are very nice communities)
>

Dear Nikki,

Oh my. It appears you may have wandered into the drawing room when the boxing ring is a few doors down. We all get lost now and again, no harm done.


trouble

 

Re: civility manifesto

Posted by wendy b. on March 4, 2002, at 21:09:40

In reply to Re: civility manifesto, posted by trouble on March 4, 2002, at 12:47:54

Oh, I'm just on a roll tonight, 2 posts to PSB! Sorry to all who I haven't written to in ages, it's a been a busy but productive time...

Dr Bob never took out any of the fuck words I ever used... Maybe because I never said to anybody 'fuck you,' just used the word when necessary and to make a point. Or to call something fucked up. I'd be surprised if he outright censored the word... (We'll see) But he never did it even a few months ago. Has something happened?

Loads of times people get angry at each other on the Board, but it usually works itself out in time. And yes, people get banned for a week, but it's because the very simple rules of civility aren't being followed, and I do think it's Dr Bob's right to censure people on his own board.

Best,
Wendy

ps: can anybody give me the URLs to some sites that other PSB-ers have started? Any list somewhere on another post?

> > I respect and like Dr bob.. he has provided a place for us all which he did not need to.
> >
> > I get very annoyed that he is constantly being attacked for his policies. Remember, this is HIS web site... if you ran this place, you would run it with YOUR policies.
> >
> > if people don't like it why don't they go and set up their own board (which HAS been done by members here, and are very nice communities)
> >
>
>
>
> Dear Nikki,
>
> Oh my. It appears you may have wandered into the drawing room when the boxing ring is a few doors down. We all get lost now and again, no harm done.
>
>
> trouble

 

Re: civility : other Boards/sites?

Posted by fi on March 5, 2002, at 12:00:00

In reply to Re: civility manifesto, posted by NikkiT2 on March 4, 2002, at 8:29:41

Can I also ask (like Wendy) if anyone can post urls of Boards/ discussion lists (or links to posts including them)?

Fi


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