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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 24 of 24. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by sar on April 30, 2001, at 19:21:53
Hey girl,
You out there? How are you?
Posted by Lisa Simpson on May 1, 2001, at 15:00:34
In reply to Lisa Simpson, posted by sar on April 30, 2001, at 19:21:53
Hi Sar! It's great to hear from you.
I'm still drinking, I'm afraid. My doctor arranged for me to see a special alcohol counsellor. She was very nice, but all she did was want to listen to me talk - I told her all the things on my mind, and even ended up in tears, silly me... but she didn't have any real positige suggestions or ideas on how I could stop. She told me all the things that would happen to me if I carried on, ie brain damage. It scared me, yes. But...
How are you doing. Do you still have blackouts? Are you drinking? Maybe we could stop together if you are... I know it would help me a lot if I knew there was someone in there with me! Whaddya think?
Where do you live? I live in Surrey (which is near London) in England. I guess you probably live in the States, as most people here seem to!
Anyhow, thanks for your post. Please let me know how you are doing.
Lisa
x
Posted by sar on May 1, 2001, at 21:25:20
In reply to Re: Lisa Simpson, posted by Lisa Simpson on May 1, 2001, at 15:00:34
Lisa,
Hey! I wasn't sure if you were visiting Babble anymore, glad that you are...
I'm still drinking too, tho it's now been a month since my last blackout...the quantity I drink is lower, the frequency about the same...my most recent rule for myself, tho, was that I'd be allowed to drink Thursday through Sunday...but I always seem to start a day early and stop a day late :(
Will you see the alcohol counselor regularly, or was it a one-time thing? How has your drinking been lately?
Helping each other out sounds good to me! It's too bad we're so far from each other...I'm all the way over in Texas. But please e-mail me if you'd like, or post for me here.
take care for now.
hugs,
sar
Posted by Lisa Simpson on May 3, 2001, at 6:24:42
In reply to Re: Lisa Simpson, posted by sar on May 1, 2001, at 21:25:20
Hi Sar - thanks for your post. I'm supposed to see the counsellor every two weeks. I'm not sure how helpful this will be, tho'.
Tell me, Sar, do you actually want to give up drinking altogether, or do you want to cut down to a more healthy level? I don't think I could cut down - I would have to try to stop altogether if I was going to do anything. Have you been to any AA sessions or anything like that?
Lisa
Posted by sar on May 3, 2001, at 11:20:43
In reply to Re: Lisa Simpson, posted by Lisa Simpson on May 3, 2001, at 6:24:42
Lisa,
I'd like to try cutting down drastically, which might involve a moratorium on drinking altogether for awhile in order to get it all out of my system & get me accustomed to falling asleep completely sober. I want to stick with not blacking out anymore and not even getting completely drunk, tho I would eventually like to return to my old, old pattern--what I consider "normal"--drinking moderately with friends a few times a month. I don't want to drink by myself anymore.
I'm on my fifth or sixth day of prozac now--a good incentive for me, because the pdoc said it wouldn't really be effective if I keep drinking the way I do. If I could cut out drinking completely for the next six weeks or so to see how I like this drug, that'd be perfect.
I haven't been to any more AA meetings...I just don't know if I belong there if I don't quite believe that I'm an alcoholic and if I'm not about to commit myself to a lifetime of sobriety.
Since my last blackout, it's become really apparent to me how much depression and drinking too much feed off one another. My mood has lifted (which could also be attributed to other things, but I'm gonna keep going with this) and I haven't felt like getting trashed since that time...what I seem unable to quit is drinking to mellow out, associating the flavor of my favorite drinks with feeling soothed, and drinking as soon as I feel the slightest bit agitated...
Posted by Lisa Simpson on May 4, 2001, at 5:43:22
In reply to Re: Lisa Simpson, posted by sar on May 3, 2001, at 11:20:43
Hi Sar
That's what I would like to do - cut out drinking altogether for a few weeks. My incentive is that I go on holiday in July, and as at the moment I would look like a beached whale, I would like to stop drinking in order to lose weight. After all, there is a hell of a lot of calories in a bottle of vodka.
So how would you feel about us doing this together - and support each other on a daily basis. If you are in agreement with this, how about we start on either this Sunday or Monday... cut out drinking completely for about six weeks. Whaddya say?
Also, if there is anyone else reading this thread, perhaps they would like to offer us their support. Cos I don't know about you, Sar, but I need all the help I can get!!
I'm fed up of feeling sick in the morning, and of not being able to remember much of the night before.
Lisa
Posted by dreamer on May 4, 2001, at 9:15:34
In reply to Alcoholics Unite!!, posted by Lisa Simpson on May 4, 2001, at 5:43:22
>
>
> I'm fed up of feeling sick in the morning, and of not being able to remember much of the night before.
>
> LisaWell done girl!Been there. You're on the way to sobriety if you're feeling like this .
Posted by NikkiT2 on May 6, 2001, at 9:43:59
In reply to Re: Lisa Simpson, posted by Lisa Simpson on May 1, 2001, at 15:00:34
I know you've probably heard this.. but have you tried AA... My brother found it a huge huge uge help, to the point he takes his own meetings now...
I've left my email address on this post, as I know my brother would definately be willing to give you some support over this. You can email me and I will give you his email address.. i do mean this very much (I'm in UK too ya see)
Take care and good luck
Nikki xxx
Posted by sar on May 6, 2001, at 16:42:11
In reply to Alcoholics Unite!!, posted by Lisa Simpson on May 4, 2001, at 5:43:22
Lisa,
We're on! I drank both Friday night & last night and am ready for this whole near-daily thing to be over...& o am I with you on looking better as I've developed quite the beer belly (ugh)...
Have you thought about substitutes at all? Like what to turn to when craving a drink, or what to do with all of this newly sober time? I feel a sense of urgency to procure some weed to make it through the hard nights (not to make it sound as if giving up one addiction will give way to another, i'm not-at-all a hardcore smoker, I've just found that having a bit on hand for emergencies helps).
What kind of drinker are you...where do you do most of your drinking, and how much do you typically drink?
soberly,
sar
Posted by JahL on May 6, 2001, at 17:55:13
In reply to Re: Alcoholics Unite!!, posted by sar on May 6, 2001, at 16:42:11
> > Have you thought about substitutes at all? Like what to turn to when craving a drink, or what to do with all of this newly sober time? I feel a sense of urgency to procure some weed to make it through the hard nights (not to make it sound as if giving up one addiction will give way to another, i'm not-at-all a hardcore smoker, I've just found that having a bit on hand for emergencies helps).
I used to be a big-time binge-drinker. The aim was always to get high rather than just drunk. Up to 20 or 30 bottles in a couple of hrs. Gave up one day, just like that, but unfortunately (?) moved on to binging on street drugs. Got a grip on that but started binge-drinking again. I guess that stopped when alcohol no longer made me high but just more depressed. E had long ago stopped making me 'ecstatic'.
Now the only thing that gets close to filling the hole is M. Jane. All day long.
Strangely enough never tried opiates. Guess I know I'll like 'em too much.
Funnily enough, being a life-long depressive, the only meaningful experiences in my life have been whilst intoxicated!
J.
Posted by Fred Potter on May 6, 2001, at 20:33:23
In reply to Re: Alcoholics Unite!!, posted by JahL on May 6, 2001, at 17:55:13
Try 50mg Naltrexone daily. It reduces craving and sort of stops alcohol working properly if you do slip.
www.assistedrecovery.com/
tells you more
Posted by dreamer on May 7, 2001, at 10:29:02
In reply to Re: Alcoholics Unite!!, posted by JahL on May 6, 2001, at 17:55:13
>
> Funnily enough, being a life-long depressive, the only meaningful experiences in my life have been whilst intoxicated!
>
> J.
hello J,
Same here, binge drinker gave up 2 years ago.
Hows your social life now?
Is it difficult without the booze the only thing that motivated me socially was the booze [switched to hypomania and less phobic]
Now don't feel interested in going out or company,only on pc.
Posted by dreamer on May 7, 2001, at 10:38:27
In reply to Re: Alcoholics Unite!!, posted by JahL on May 6, 2001, at 17:55:13
>
> Now the only thing that gets close to filling the hole is M. Jane. All day long.
>
Whats M. Jane??
Posted by JahL on May 7, 2001, at 13:44:10
In reply to Re: Alcoholics Unite!! - JahL, posted by dreamer on May 7, 2001, at 10:29:02
> > Funnily enough, being a life-long depressive, the only meaningful experiences in my life have been whilst intoxicated!
> > J.
> hello J,
> Same here, binge drinker gave up 2 years ago.Hi pard'ner!
F*ck me; I had the most amazing discussion last night with my elder brother. He left home early & I never really got to know him. Turns out he's not the soft-lad I thought he was; he's a hard-ass drinker (& scrapper!?) who regularly puts away up to 80-100 units (month's allowance!) a session. He's 30 & weighs 10 (!) stone. Apparently I am not the only progeny who has a 'nutter' side to their personality. His doc has just told him he cld keel over dead at any time.
Like me tho', he's not an alcoholic; we both drink (drunk) for the escape from dysphoria getting high provides. He does a 60hr week, has his own house & is about to marry.
The fact my lil' brother also packs it away (w/o problems), serves to increase my conviction I've been mis-diagnosed & am in fact 'soft' Bipolar (III). Notorious substance-abusers. I crawl outta my skin if I'm not in some way high.
> Hows your social life now?
> Is it difficult without the booze the only thing that motivated me socially was the booze [switched to hypomania and less phobic]Wow. Identical. My heavy socialising diminished as my drinking habit did. I was *only* ever a social drinker; I wld come out of my shell when I drank, & got up to all sorts. I now have no inclination to socialise, so I don't. Some wld say this is a poor reflection upon me; I say it's a sad indictment of my condition.
> Now don't feel interested in going out or company,only on pc.
Same. I operate on a functional basis. Go out if I have to. PC is only thing that doesn't wind me up (no personality); can't stomach all the inflated egos on TV/radio. 'Geek' doesn't suit me though...
J.
Posted by JahL on May 7, 2001, at 13:59:05
In reply to Re: Alcoholics Unite!!-JahL, posted by dreamer on May 7, 2001, at 10:38:27
> > Whats M. Jane??My beloved Mary Jane. Pot, except that word doesn't do justice to the many & various samples I manage to aquire%-). Not a day has passed, for 8 yrs, that we haven't met. Can't sleep w/o it, see? Being a resourceful kinda guy, going abroad has never presented a problem.
Can someone tell me tho' ; why don't US (I'm UK) garage forecourts sell skins (papers)? Isn't that what they're for?:-)
J.
Posted by sar on May 8, 2001, at 0:01:53
In reply to Re: (Bingeing) Alcoholics Unite!! » dreamer, posted by JahL on May 7, 2001, at 13:44:10
I verymuch like being intoxicated. I just dont know if I know where to draw the line...apparently I've no ability to stop drinking regardless of how drunk I am despite my original aim to just be "high," relaxed, what have you...it doesn't end that way. in blackout i can drink whiskey like water (i've been told. it's slightly disconcerting to imagine.)
Alcohol seems so integral to socializing that I wonder how this whole thing will go over with me. A week or 2 ago some of my new co-workers invited me to a movie & bar afterwards, then after the movie they decided they'd actually rather have coffee at a diner (& I didn't know these ppl, they probably can't sense the extent of my shyness *or* my extreme rowdiness when drinking) and I couldn't do it, made up a lame excuse & went home (knowing it would be sober hanging out)...I get bored & uncomfortable without alcohol in the equation...
I have a certain affection for pot because I know it so well and feel as if it's saved me at times. After I cut down smokin pot it seemed as if it agitated my sp rather than relieving it; the last time I smoked w/ ppl I became so overly aware of what was going on that I thought maybe I'd have a heart attack, could hear blood pulsing in my ears & just didn't want to be there anymore...smoking alone tho is absolutely joyful, I can lay back to music completely blissed-out...down here the weed is pretty much yr basic shwag from Mexico, cheap & plentiful...the good stuff is harder to get but worth it.
> Like me tho', he's not an alcoholic; we both drink (drunk) for the escape from dysphoria getting high provides.
Well that's why most ppl drink, bay....it all goes hand in hand, I think...alcohol's beautiful when not abused. I'm glad you gave up bingeing, what made you stop? I know what you mean about crawling outta yr skin while not on something...tho i am envious of yr better weed prospects! i tend to do whatever drug is presented to me. i'm highly curious. (escapist?)irie,
sar
Posted by NikkiT2 on May 8, 2001, at 9:19:08
In reply to Re: (Bingeing) Alcoholics Unite!! , posted by sar on May 8, 2001, at 0:01:53
I am also int he UK, and, like Jah, am a daily smoker.. Your comment about "tend to do whatever drug is presented to me. i'm highly curious. " really hit home to me.. I've always been a "try anything once" kinda gal, and am now thinking that maybe I'm just hoping to hit ont he eprfect drug to take me out of everything... So, have now stopped at what i ahve tried (doesn't ;eave alot to try though!!), and am avoiding that final hurdle - heroin.. Just ahve a feeling I would like it too much and be on that slippery slope!!
Hope things are going OK for ya.. I may not post much, but I'm closely following your progress here, and want to let you know I'm sending supportive energies your way.
nikki
Posted by dreamer on May 8, 2001, at 15:10:24
In reply to Re: (Bingeing) Alcoholics Unite!! » sar, posted by NikkiT2 on May 8, 2001, at 9:19:08
Couldn't do anything without the binge never got hangovers always hypomanic for following 3 days then back to the binge.
Used to RUN to the off-licience with excitement before it shut I was a kid in a sweety shop always keen to try out a new brew.
Drank alone just to sleep and to get up to go to work put on weight and when without cash would pester friends 4 cash~bad news had to stop.
Tried the hash always get acute shitzophrenia even though I'm not schitzophrenic even mild grass.
Now I decrease/increase AD's for a hypomanic switch.On AD's I'm BP2 without BP1 ~my own diagnosis.UK NHS = shite.
Posted by JahL on May 9, 2001, at 20:38:13
In reply to Re: (Bingeing) Alcoholics Unite!! , posted by sar on May 8, 2001, at 0:01:53
> >. I have a certain affection for potI overstate my affection; it's just it's the only thing I can 'use' all-day-every-day w/o melting my brain. If I'm out I can't wait to get back for a spliff.
> >...smoking alone tho is absolutely joyful, I can lay back to music completely blissed-out...down here the weed is pretty much yr basic shwag from Mexico, cheap & plentiful...the good stuff is harder to get but worth it.
I only *ever* smoke alone. Relaxes me & enhances my enjoyment of my other addiction; music. In company it makes me slow, dumb & paranoid.
> > Well that's why most ppl drink, bay....it all goes hand in hand.
Most people aren't *permanently* dysphoric tho' :-(> > I think...alcohol's beautiful when not abused.
So do I. Best all-round drug. A drug for all occasions! I can now easily moderate my drinking.
> > I'm glad you gave up bingeing, what made you stop?
S. phobia started to break through socialing effect, & depression had become so bad that drink no longer had any euphoriant effect & started bringing out my darker side. Last time I was out on the p*ss, just over a yr ago, I ended the night by knocking someone spark out ( that's what you get for attacking my baby brother I guess >:-( ). Time to call it a day I thought.
> > I know what you mean about crawling outta yr skin while not on something...tho i am envious of yr better weed prospects! i tend to do whatever drug is presented to me. i'm highly curious.
What you wanna know? Barring opiates (for the reason given by Nikki), I've consumed vast quantities of pretty much everything going (completely stopped 3 yrs ago). If I ever become well, I'll definitely be using mushrooms again. Squeegee yr 3rd eye, as Bill Hicks wld say.
> >(escapist?)
Most definitely. Who *wouldn't* want to escape?!
J.
PS: "UK NHS = shite".
You UK too dreamer? If so, I'm sorry. ;-)
Posted by sar on May 10, 2001, at 1:21:15
In reply to Re: (Bingeing) Alcoholics Unite!! » sar, posted by JahL on May 9, 2001, at 20:38:13
...for the first time in a week. The stores here don't sell after 12--no alcohol tonight.
Lisa...how is it going for you? You on the saddle or off? :)
Nikki...thank you. I've always liked that "try anything once" aspect in both myself & other people...tho I agree with you, heroin is some shady stuff, terribly appealing...an aquaintance once described it to me (I've never done it) as "riding on top of a fastmoving train having an orgasm throwing up loving it the whole time" (or somesuch)...I've got too addictive a personality tho, I'd be a goner. I do remember your earlier posts quite well, you were a prolific poster when I first started reading PSB & found myself following yr story with interest...I hope you're taking care of yourself right now...
sar
Posted by Lisa Simpson on May 10, 2001, at 7:00:34
In reply to made it to midnight..., posted by sar on May 10, 2001, at 1:21:15
Hi Sar - sorry I haven't been in touch before now, especially after my suggestion about us both giving up together last Monday!! But things have been a little hectic.
I have tried hard this week - lasted a whole day without any, and the last couple of days had a little of my other half's wine with some lemonade in it in the evening. Just to feel sociable, although it doesn't do anything. I find this so hard, though. Mostly because I am having great trouble sleeping. I sleep for 15 minutes, wake up for 30 minutes, sleep for 10 minutes, wake up for an hour. And so on. It's a real pain. Ar least with half a bottle of vodka, I can sleep real good!
How are you doing?
Lisa
Posted by Lisa Simpson on May 10, 2001, at 7:03:01
In reply to Re: Lisa Simpson » Lisa Simpson, posted by NikkiT2 on May 6, 2001, at 9:43:59
Hi Nikki - thanks very much for your post, and your very kind offer. I may well take you up on it!
How are things going with you? How did all that hospital business sort itself out in the end?
Lisa
Posted by NikkiT2 on May 10, 2001, at 11:08:10
In reply to To NikkiT2, posted by Lisa Simpson on May 10, 2001, at 7:03:01
Thanks sar.. they were very kind words. I don;'t post as oftne as I used to here, as the social feeling has changed somewhat... dunno, I keep getting antaganised too much here!! :o)
Lisa - The hospital stuff!!! *lol* Weeelllll.... I finally got my referral to day hospital last week!!! I told them where to shove it :o) I managed to get 3 appointments with a Psychologist privately, and now ahve an NHS one. They are all saying the same thing (Personality disorder called schizotypal) and the NHS one is being great and building me a whole treatment plan whcih I'm looking forward to!!!
All in all, things are definately looking up at the moment.
Hope things are getting there for you...
nikki xxx
Posted by sar on May 10, 2001, at 16:44:43
In reply to Re: made it to midnight..., posted by Lisa Simpson on May 10, 2001, at 7:00:34
Lisa--
No worries. Post when you can.
Sunday & Monday were hailstorm, tornado watch, pms, newly purchased Bob Dylan album which all called for a few cold tallboys. Tuesday I visited my old town, was reminded of my perdition, called for three 24 oz microbrew.
My parents noticed last week that I'd been heavily nipping from their liquor collection (which they never touch) and poured it all down the drain! So it's a dry residence now...for the best.
I know what you mean about sleeping...I've always had sort of a fear of getting into bed and not being able to sleep (or continuing to wake up) so I don't get in bed 'til I'm absolutely exhausted. I hope this doesn't sound trite, but have you tried taking a very hot bath before bed? Do you know how to do deep-belly breathing?
I think it'll take awhile for our bodies to get accustomed to this. One of the most difficult things for me is feeling annoyed, angry, agitated & riding it out sober.
well, I've just drunk a "tallboy" of Arizona Iced Tea & I'm gonna go shop for shoes...good clean sober fun!
:(
sar
This is the end of the thread.
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