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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 8 of 8. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by baseball55 on October 30, 2013, at 20:16:04
Please don't give up on this in anger. I think this is a worthwhile discussion. We all struggle with the ways we are alike and the ways we are different. We all struggle with what we need or want from others.
Posted by Partlycloudy on October 31, 2013, at 8:21:04
In reply to To Partly Cloudy and Alex, posted by baseball55 on October 30, 2013, at 20:16:04
Thanks for your concern.
Posted by Partlycloudy on October 31, 2013, at 9:56:11
In reply to Re: To Partly Cloudy and Alex » baseball55, posted by Partlycloudy on October 31, 2013, at 8:21:04
I have asked Dr Bob for clarification about the Do Not Post to Me request. My understand of days long gone by was that it would not be enforced.
I would, though, gladly bear a block or PBC for my response to SLS as I felt it was rather provocative, in a perturbing way.
I thought I had a lot of support here. I really enjoy(ed) engaging with the posters who didn't feel I was throwing out vibes of hatred. No idea where that came from.
Being ostracized, though, is different. It smacks of schoolyard behaviour. I didn't think we're stooping to that level.
Maybe I am mistaken.
Posted by Willful on October 31, 2013, at 14:22:07
In reply to Re: To Partly Cloudy and Alex, posted by Partlycloudy on October 31, 2013, at 9:56:11
Hi PC,
I also hope you stay here and don't let one or two posters however "important" they seem, or however much they're respected here-- which I'm sure Alex and SLS-- and you-- are-- throw you off. I know that I myself respond based on what I read and the history that I remember of people who've been here and contributed here-- and while I might understand where people who react against something are coming from (or not)-- I make my own judgments and have my own complicated feelings about everyone.
Plus-- I 'm hopeful that we all work towards have complex views of each other-- not black/white, my side/your side views.
Sometimes, I'll be honest, you seem angry to me-- but it may be that you're vehement or passionate and it comes across as anger-- or it may be that at those times, you've touched a nerve in me-- it may not be you at all.
And anyway, there's nothing wrong with a little momentary annoyance or anger-- even if it evokes a reaction that's hurtful. Usually people can work things out and the hurtful responses can be turned into a better relationship.
I tend to think that even if everyone seems to dislike or be put off by something I write-- as I'm sure they are at times-- there are some people out there who see through it, and know what I"m getting at- even if they don't say anything. Not to mention that I'm not always at my best. I have the hope, though, that people will over time see the better part of me not the worst.
So hang in here, and don't start to believe that there's some inner circle or that you're not welcome. This place needs people like you to stay around, even in the bad times.
Posted by Partlycloudy on October 31, 2013, at 15:39:13
In reply to Re: To Partly Cloudy and Alex, posted by Willful on October 31, 2013, at 14:22:07
That was really nice of you to say, and I thank you. I know that I do come across as angry, especially when I am angered. HA! And having posted here off and on for many years, I have a story where I have built up a history with some posters.
I thought I had put it behind me, but now it's biting me on the behind. I do think that the interplay between the posters in question escalated quickly, heatedly, and some posters heard me say things they don't agree with.
I am OK with that. I am not alright, though, with being characterised in a way that does not reflect who I am. I call it being bullied. Others might call it challenging me.
So I am sitting and waiting to see what happens. I think I have. Laid out my case pretty clearly.
PC
Posted by sigismund on October 31, 2013, at 18:26:25
In reply to Re: To Partly Cloudy and Alex, posted by Willful on October 31, 2013, at 14:22:07
I don't know if it projection or what but generally here we often attribute the most negative interpretation to posts.
It is partly the medium, in part the lack of other input we would get from face to face contact, those small gestures which can moderate what otherwise can be felt as hurtful.
Posted by Dr. Bob on November 2, 2013, at 0:48:30
In reply to Re: To Partly Cloudy and Alex, posted by sigismund on October 31, 2013, at 18:26:25
> I have asked Dr Bob for clarification about the Do Not Post to Me request. My understand of days long gone by was that it would not be enforced.
>
> PartlycloudyWas that on Admin? I've been swamped and avoiding Admin. In the meantime, this may be relevant:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#harassed
--
> I don't know if it projection or what but generally here we often attribute the most negative interpretation to posts.
>
> It is partly the medium, in part the lack of other input we would get from face to face contact, those small gestures which can moderate what otherwise can be felt as hurtful.
>
> sigismundI agree. One way to compensate for that is ask the other person explicitly what they meant, how they felt, etc.
Bob
Posted by Partlycloudy on November 3, 2013, at 20:11:20
In reply to Re: clarification, posted by Dr. Bob on November 2, 2013, at 0:48:30
> > I have asked Dr Bob for clarification about the Do Not Post to Me request. My understand of days long gone by was that it would not be enforced.
> >
> > Partlycloudy
>
> Was that on Admin? I've been swamped and avoiding Admin. In the meantime, this may be relevant:
>
> http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#harassed
>
> --
>
> > I don't know if it projection or what but generally here we often attribute the most negative interpretation to posts.
> >
> > It is partly the medium, in part the lack of other input we would get from face to face contact, those small gestures which can moderate what otherwise can be felt as hurtful.
> >
> > sigismund
>
> I agree. One way to compensate for that is ask the other person explicitly what they meant, how they felt, etc.
>
> BobWhy, look at that signature of his! Attributable to me! How...in character.
PC
This is the end of the thread.
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