Shown: posts 1 to 3 of 3. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by TherapyGirl on May 23, 2010, at 18:13:31
Hi, Everyone. Sorry I disappeared again. Part of it is that I feel like I don't have much new to say. I am really grieving for my T now. I have frequent dreams of her either leaving me all over again or getting mad at me about something. They are difficult dreams and I feel like I keep reliving it over and over. I haven't seen her since Feb. She's been here twice since then (and is here now), but I won't see her. She has good reasons, but you can imagine my self talk about that. I am scheduled to talk to her on the phone next week. I know I'm lucky to have even that, but I miss her so d*mn much and that part seems to be getting worse, not better.
Work is horrible. I'm looking for a new job. On the brighter side, I really like new T and I think she will be very helpful. She has been great about my T and not judgmental at all. And she agrees with everyone else who knows all the ins and outs of my work situation -- it's not a healthy place and I need to get out of there as soon as possible.
I was on vacation last week (stayed home with the pups and it was great) and am dreading going back tomorrow like you wouldn't believe. So to distract myself, I'm thinking of taking in a new foster puppy.
Oh, and we upped my Lexapro dosage because clearly I wasn't on enough. I can't tell that it's helping so far, but I guess we'll see.
Sorry, again, for all the gloom and doom. Hope you are all hanging in there okay.
Posted by Dinah on May 24, 2010, at 10:48:57
In reply to Update, posted by TherapyGirl on May 23, 2010, at 18:13:31
I'd hate it if my therapist told me he'd be in town when he wouldn't be seeing me. I think I'd rather not know.
Being in a bad work environment is so stressful. You spend so much time there. I hope you find something else quickly, and I'm glad you have a therapist you like to help you devise strategies for getting through this time. Are you learning a lot from CBT?
Posted by TherapyGirl on May 24, 2010, at 13:54:39
In reply to Re: Update » TherapyGirl, posted by Dinah on May 24, 2010, at 10:48:57
Thanks, Dinah. You're right -- I'd rather not know. I think she keeps telling me on the small chance that I will run into her while she's here. I guess that would be worse, but I don't know.
Too early to tell how much I'm learning from CBT. With the work situation, for example, I keep getting tripped up because it's not just my negative thoughts -- it's reality. We talked about that some last time (I took her emails showing the communication between all of us) and she agreed with me, but it doesn't help that I can't just change the way I'm thinking of it.
More work to do...
This is the end of the thread.
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