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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 11 of 11. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by obsidian on March 16, 2010, at 22:29:58
some people say it's all attitude.
I don't know about that.
it makes me feel inadequate, to hear that perspective, but what if it is?
I know that when I have been depressed, nothing feels good, everything feels pointless.
was I simply lacking a good attitude?
any thoughts?
Posted by emmanuel98 on March 16, 2010, at 23:28:30
In reply to happiness...., posted by obsidian on March 16, 2010, at 22:29:58
I have been severely depressed and suicidal and I don't think my attitude had anything to do with it. After all, why would I "want to" feel this way, adopt such an attitude? I don't think therapy helped either, except that, in meeting with my p-doc every week, I was forced more and more to accept that the problem wasn't my attitude. Medications helped, finally.
I think when someone is depressed, their friends and family feel abandoned by them. The depressed person is suddenly not fun, not pleasant to be around. The tendency of friends and family is to blame the depressed person for having a bad "attitide", for choosing to feel bad, for refusing to do things (like exercise) that would make them feel better. But, as my p-doc always said when I told him this -- why would anyone want to "make themselves" feel this way?
Posted by sigismund on March 17, 2010, at 5:21:21
In reply to Re: happiness...., posted by emmanuel98 on March 16, 2010, at 23:28:30
I have heard it.
Happiness is a choice, embrace your poverty, come and receive blessings for only $20 from spiritual millionaires who spend their holidays in ashrams in Poona, having passed an AIDS test.
Posted by sigismund on March 17, 2010, at 5:37:44
In reply to Re: happiness...., posted by sigismund on March 17, 2010, at 5:21:21
Although, embracing (aren't you sick of embracing?) the alternative view, when TS Eliot wrote
'Ridiculous, the waste sad time, stretching before and after'
he was reflecting on the fact that for him unhappiness had been more authentic than happiness, and that had been a mistake.
Bertrand Russell concluded that the Eliots preferred to be unhappy. But hell, Bertrand Russell? You know about his family?I'm like that. I don't want to be happy. Or do I? Or do I not? Maybe I want revenge?
The rag and bone shop of the human heart.
Posted by sigismund on March 17, 2010, at 5:39:54
In reply to Re: happiness...., posted by emmanuel98 on March 16, 2010, at 23:28:30
>But, as my p-doc always said when I told him this -- why would anyone want to "make themselves" feel this way?
Good question.
Anything is possible.
Posted by floatingbridge on March 17, 2010, at 10:57:48
In reply to Re: happiness...., posted by sigismund on March 17, 2010, at 5:37:44
> I'm like that. I don't want to be happy. Or do I? Or do I not? Maybe I want revenge?
>
> The rag and bone shop of the human heart.
Posted by floatingbridge on March 17, 2010, at 11:05:19
In reply to happiness...., posted by obsidian on March 16, 2010, at 22:29:58
sid,
Frankly, when I hear stuff like that, my hackles rise. P*sses me off. Life is infinietly more complex than that. However, I still fall for it because, being a good little american, I've internalized the message.
I agree w/ emmanuel--well-put.
Well, and happiness, what is it? Absence of suffering? A modest ratio? Something to chase, possess, grab? (Oh dear, somebody stop me.)
Thinking of a Bjork song, "Violently Happy".
Posted by obsidian on March 18, 2010, at 20:13:05
In reply to Re: happiness...., posted by emmanuel98 on March 16, 2010, at 23:28:30
you know, it's interesting, because recently I've had a bit of success with my meds (crosses fingers)
lamictal increase + effexor xr decrease, and I feel generally better, less stressed, less reactive, less bothered by a lot of things, not terribly "depressed" (I always have a hard time defining for myself what that means).and my "attitude" is better, but I don't think I could have managed it otherwise, I think it was beyond me to change it
I often feel like a bad person when I am "negative", irritable, sensitive, and I don't think other people like me because of that, and I think I have been "blamed" for it.
it is an interesting thing to think of one's personality characteristics verses their mood state, and whats what
that is for me I meanI am by no means in a perfect state mind you, but a little lighter.
Posted by floatingbridge on March 18, 2010, at 22:08:08
In reply to Re: happiness...., posted by obsidian on March 18, 2010, at 20:13:05
>
> I am by no means in a perfect state mind you, but a little lighter.perfect might be too scary :) lighter sounds very good!
Posted by obsidian on March 18, 2010, at 22:28:16
In reply to Re: happiness.... » obsidian, posted by floatingbridge on March 18, 2010, at 22:08:08
thanks :-)
it is good
Posted by floatingbridge on March 19, 2010, at 10:59:08
In reply to happiness...., posted by obsidian on March 16, 2010, at 22:29:58
Hey, posted a light, interesting book review on soc board from NYer about happiness.
This is the end of the thread.
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