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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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Posted by elizabeth31 on September 27, 2009, at 11:46:52
I was just wondering if its an appropriate question to ask a therapist what his/her religious beliefs are? I'm catholic and I often talk openly to my therapist about my faith-but don't of course ever talk about his opinions. I think I know he's Christian (I asked him once if his daughters were baptized and he said yes) I also do talk to my psychiatrist about religion because over the course of years he's told me he's jewish and he's been a really good resource to discuss differences in our beliefs in a non-threatening way (his wife was raised catholic)
I guess I'm just curious what the official boundaries are on this subject. Thanks everyone:)
Posted by Dinah on September 27, 2009, at 12:33:48
In reply to is religion an appropriate topic in therapy?, posted by elizabeth31 on September 27, 2009, at 11:46:52
It is in mine. My therapist says that their spiritual life is very important to many people, so for those people it is as integral part of therapy as other important areas of life are.
He's a pastoral counselor, but he never introduces religion himself. At first I knew only the sketchiest details of what denomination he is, etc. but over time he's been more open about his beliefs. They not infrequently don't agree with mine, although he says we agree on the basics. But we're both very tolerant people. The only problem is that I *really* like talking theology and don't often get a chance to do it frankly, so if I don't watch it I can drift into discussing it purely for enjoyment.
I'm guessing therapists are reluctant to share their views for fear that clients may be alienated. My therapist is frank now, to a point, but I can tell he's careful.
Posted by Daisym on September 27, 2009, at 13:04:45
In reply to Re: is religion an appropriate topic in therapy?, posted by Dinah on September 27, 2009, at 12:33:48
We talk about God and the lessons of suffering often. I'm Catholic and my therapist is Jewish. We talk more about my thinking than his, but he does put his two cents in. He also talks frequently about his beliefs in a Jungian fashion - existential sorts of questions and existence of basic evil in the world.
I think anything that feels this important should be brought up. Your therapist can tell you why he prefers not to discuss this, if this is true.
Posted by elizabeth31 on September 27, 2009, at 15:05:10
In reply to Re: is religion an appropriate topic in therapy?, posted by Daisym on September 27, 2009, at 13:04:45
Thanks for sharing ladies! I definitely think theology has a place in therapy and like you said Dinah, I think Im probably too interested in it and like talking about it too much :) I could definitely ask him about his religious beliefs and I'm pretty sure I already have good idea...but I guess knowing myself, I haven't yet asked him because there is that slight chance Im wrongand it would absolutely devastate me to find out he was an atheist and I don't know if his telling me has any benefit to me.
There are some things related to religion that would change my opinion of him (you can call me judgmental if you wish) but for example, if one day he was to tell me he was getting a divorce that would be really hard for me to accept. My psychiatrist who is Jewish and I have talked about different core beliefs related to medication issues and its been a topic that we differ viewpoints on (a simple example, would be something like birth control) not that hes prescribing me birth controlbut its something I dont think is appropriate and he does and its obviously not problematic within our relationship. But valuing human life when I was suffering from depression I found it hard when he would ask me about suicidal thoughts as I was always likeno, I would never take my own life and couldnt even imagine even in my worst times ever considering that option.
I also have ran into religious debates as far as medication long-term issues with my familymy parents are both protestant and have told me that my faith in God should be enough to get me through things and they dont believe medications are part of the answer. It's been frustrating at times. So anyways, this is a rambling post and I am all over the place as usual!
Posted by mmealltalk on September 27, 2009, at 15:05:21
In reply to Re: is religion an appropriate topic in therapy?, posted by Daisym on September 27, 2009, at 13:04:45
I have found religion to be a helpful topic on the occasions it comes up. My t and I are both Jewish and we discuss laws and beleifs or interpretations of relavent material from time to time. I think more than anything it makes me feel we have an added connection which feels good.
Just my 2 cents
Mel
Posted by blahblahblah on September 27, 2009, at 18:45:36
In reply to is religion an appropriate topic in therapy?, posted by elizabeth31 on September 27, 2009, at 11:46:52
Hey, well I'm agnostic, more into existentialism ideas. My therapist is buddhist. she once told me i should try do some buddhist readings as it may help me with my questioning bout suffering and things. i responded with that is your belief, don't push it onto me. we have never spoken about it since. :)
Posted by Dinah on September 27, 2009, at 18:55:20
In reply to Re: is religion an appropriate topic in therapy?, posted by elizabeth31 on September 27, 2009, at 15:05:10
Well, as I say, my therapist and I both have tolerance near the top of both our lists of virtues to strive for, so I'm sure we could deal with any philosophical discussions that arose. I know we differ on some of the more controversial issues, but I'm ok with that. He has a well thought out position, and doesn't take them lightly. He respects my beliefs and I respect his.
I'm a bit unorthodox in my theology and I worry sometimes about offending him or having him think less of me. And there are some statements he could make that would cause me to read him the riot act. But so far he hasn't made them, and in fact appears to be sensitive enough to the issues to avoid making them.
But instead he tells me that at least I'm thinking about these things, and that maybe it's my purpose to stimulate others to think about things, rather than to be more orthodox myself. Sometimes he'll say something like "I was reading James and that made me think of what you said about that being your favorite book of the New Testament."
It does come up as a legitimate therapy topic, because my views sometimes cause me interpersonal difficulties. Not now, thank heavens. I've found a congenial and open minded group for Sunday School. :)
I consider myself very lucky to have a therapist who is ok with discussing these things.
Posted by antigua3 on September 28, 2009, at 8:41:43
In reply to is religion an appropriate topic in therapy?, posted by elizabeth31 on September 27, 2009, at 11:46:52
Interesting topic, and one I've been forced to think about lately. My T and I rarely discuss religion or my spiritual beliefs.
My psychiatrist, however, surprised me recently. I was talking about a dream I had that took place in a church and he started throwing religious dogma my way, which took me by surprise. "That if you believe this, you have to believe that." Our religions aren't far apart, but he often assumes they are the same, but they aren't and our positions are very different. He seems to have trouble with remembering that I am coming from a different viewpoint, or doesn't accept the validity of my viewpoint. That would certainly fit the pattern with him, and it maybe it can help me understand why he is so dogmatic about therapeutic things.
Interesting.
Thanks,
antigua
Posted by 10derHeart on September 28, 2009, at 15:17:51
In reply to Re: is religion an appropriate topic in therapy?, posted by antigua3 on September 28, 2009, at 8:41:43
My T. and I rarely have a session where it is not discussed, because it just weaves its way naturally into speech, on both our parts. We are both Christian. We essentially have really similar sets of beliefs, and follow about the same traditions. Although when it is specifically discussed, I never think of it as "religion", but as a relationship...but that is for another time and board :-)
It is so essential to my sense of self, of priorities, a source of strength and hope, I'm not sure I could work effectively with a therapist that believed nothing, or believed in a radically different way from me. Not to say all those folks aren't effective therapists and fabulous for other people - I am sure they are. But probably not for me. I can't separate out all that from therapy. Like if it were a dentist, or physical therapist, no issues. But psychotherapy is so very, very intimate and so much - for me - about delving into the relationship I have with God, etc., AND with my therapist, I just don't know what it would be like if i felt I had to tone down or suppress, or be careful not to offend or something.
I like this topic.
Posted by annierose on September 28, 2009, at 16:23:10
In reply to Re: is religion an appropriate topic in therapy?, posted by antigua3 on September 28, 2009, at 8:41:43
Interesting that this topic came up on babble today as I had an interesting dialogue with my t on this subject on Thursday and I've been thinking about it.
Early on in our therapy relationship, the topic of religion came up in a natural way. I was raised Christian and my husband is Jewish - so I talked about how we dealt with our differences in our marriage and with our children. Both of us are more spiritual in our approach and less concerned about theology.
Fast forward to the here and now: My therapist feels I need more solid foundation that I am okay - just the way I am. She knows that for a few years I enjoyed going to yoga but have not gone this year (due to injuries). She mentioned a string of ideas to help me shore up my self-worth ... to compliment the therapy. She mentioned some books she thought I'd enjoy and when she described them, they sounded very religious. So I said, "Well ... you are more religious than I am ... that type of book wouldn't appeal to me." And quickly AND SHARPLY she said (in fact it took me by surprised) "I am not religious, I am a spiritual person." WHOA ... okay ... a tad defensive IMO.
It's interesting because without knowing where she stood, we shared similar "spiritual" beliefs. But her quick retort, still surprises me.
Posted by elizabeth31 on September 28, 2009, at 16:55:54
In reply to Re: is religion an appropriate topic in therapy?, posted by annierose on September 28, 2009, at 16:23:10
What great feedback! Very interesting to read every ones individual stories. Hmm...as I was pondering the posts I wonder if the consensus would be to agree that religion is apart of therapy and important to everyone at least to some degree. I am confused by my thoughts though upon realizing that I would want to find a therapist who is similar to me in religious views because as some of us pointed out, we were really able to learn and grow from our therapists differences too. I was thinking if I ever move and have to change therapists I would want to find Catholic ones but now I wonder that that sort of information might not be appropriate upon initially deciding upon choosing a therapist. I would be so sad to think of all I would have missed out on with my current Jewish therapist. I guess its just really based on personalities and who we clique withto each of us, our own :)
Posted by obsidian on September 29, 2009, at 0:17:17
In reply to Re: is religion an appropriate topic in therapy?, posted by elizabeth31 on September 28, 2009, at 16:55:54
it's an interesting subject
I asked once, and my T told me that he does believe in God, I don't, but it was oddly comforting coming from him
I come from a strongly religious background, and oddly enough, it's one part of my life that doesn't make me twinge when thinking about it. It feels like it's about asking questions, finding a larger meaning, understanding deeply from the experiences of others, making sense of one's own experience. I am an atheist who likes theology I suppose. Perhaps I'll bring up the subject again. Thanks :-)
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