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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by psychmom on June 15, 2009, at 21:03:28
Hi everyone,
Sorry it took me so long to do a "intro" post. I have been having some major issues with my t. He is going through some things personally and I have lashed out at him this week. How could he "encourage" me to talk about this stuff and then say see you in 3 weeks??? Isn't that cruel??
Having difficulty processing the situation. I have been going through issues that has brough up some past trauma, so he wanted me to talk about it last session. I told him prior to the session I wanted to wait until he could see me reguarly for support. Anyway he brought it up, and my life has been falling apart. I have lashed out at him and told him some facts in a overly direct way. I know it has hurt him because he is sooo sensitive! Anyway he was upset at me so I send him an email tonight and told him i am not going to lash out anymore. He calls me, and we talk, going to see him tomorrow. Bottom like is I didn't want to crawl to him. I want him to see me because he wants to see me... Not because i am forcing him 2! Anyway, he wants me to go to a place for survivors.. Not really happy about that..> I don't open up well, specially if it is a group situation.
Does anyone else have issues with therapists that are the same gender?
Thanks for reading.
~psychmom
Posted by FindingMyDesire on June 15, 2009, at 22:44:26
In reply to introduction and feedback needed, posted by psychmom on June 15, 2009, at 21:03:28
Hi psychmom,
Sorry this is so hard. You have been seeing him for 3 years, right? Has the issue of his availability come up before? If so, I wonder how it was handled then. Were you able to really talk to him about it?I'm curious, too, about the feeling you have that he is so sensitive and that you are worried about lashing out at him. Of course our Ts are regular people with feelings, but your process is about you and your feelings, not so much his. When you say he was upset with you, what was this like? Are you able to tell him you think he got upset with you?
I will say I just hate it when my T is unavailable. It has got to be the most triggering thing. And it happens. And it sucks. And I *think* it can be meaningful if worked through somehow, although I certainly don't have the answers and know that It Is Hard.
I'm curious about your gender question. What do you mean?
I'm so sorry to hear about past trauma and that it is activated right now. I respect your need for having enough resources at the ready to process these feelings!
Thinking of you. I hope that you will post here if it helps.
FMD
Posted by psychmom on June 15, 2009, at 23:17:49
In reply to Re: introduction and feedback needed, posted by FindingMyDesire on June 15, 2009, at 22:44:26
Thanks for your feedback. For the question about gender. I am female, but I never had much success connecting with a female therapist, even though my abuse was from a male. I find that kind of odd, and not sure what to make out of it...
Posted by Phillipa on June 16, 2009, at 12:26:26
In reply to Re: introduction and feedback needed, posted by psychmom on June 15, 2009, at 23:17:49
I've never gotten along with women at all. Men are more forgiving to me that is. Phillipa
Posted by sassyfrancesca on June 16, 2009, at 15:01:04
In reply to introduction and feedback needed, posted by psychmom on June 15, 2009, at 21:03:28
Hi, and welcome! you are supposed to talk about whatever YOU want to; it isn't supposed to be the t's choice.
He should want to understand why you lash out; if you have to worry about HIS feelings, that is a problem.
Great to "meet" you here and look forward to getting to know you. I am the moderator of an abused survivors' (yahoo) group; if you would be interested.
Smiles, Sassy
Posted by psychmom on June 18, 2009, at 17:59:55
In reply to Re: introduction and feedback needed » psychmom, posted by Phillipa on June 16, 2009, at 12:26:26
> I've never gotten along with women at all. Men are more forgiving to me that is. Phillipa
Yes, I feel that they are very less judgemental.
This is the end of the thread.
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