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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 13 of 13. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by TherapyGirl on November 5, 2008, at 6:47:16
My T, who is retiring in Dec. 2009, is going to move 5 hours away after she retires. To be near her granddaughter.
I am sad and anxious beyond belief. I wept like a baby.
It was all I could do not to say to her, "Your granddaughter has OTHER people who love her."
I can't do this.
Posted by sassyfrancesca on November 5, 2008, at 8:45:29
In reply to She's moving, posted by TherapyGirl on November 5, 2008, at 6:47:16
(((therapy girl))): Oh, sweetie...I hear your pain and misery. Could you occasionally see her...stay in touch via e-mail or phone?
Love, Sassy
Posted by Dinah on November 5, 2008, at 8:50:42
In reply to She's moving, posted by TherapyGirl on November 5, 2008, at 6:47:16
((((Therapygirl))))
Sometimes I almost hate them for being able to leave us.
Posted by LadyBug on November 5, 2008, at 9:55:00
In reply to She's moving, posted by TherapyGirl on November 5, 2008, at 6:47:16
(((((((TherapyGirl)))))))
I know how it feels. I found out in July my T is retiring in December of this year. They aren't supposed to do that to us. I don't know how it would feel to have a one year notice. I know it's hard. I met with my T last night after a therapy relationship break down............and now I won't be able to see her much longer and she'll be gone. I haven't talked to her about any contact after. I don't want to bug her, but I would like her to know of upcoming events in my life, like my daughters wedding next year.
It feels like abandonment to me, so I know how it feels. I also just took a 6 month break and I realize now, leaving will be ok. It has to come to an end, as everything does.
Make your time count.
LadyBug
Posted by Phillipa on November 5, 2008, at 10:15:04
In reply to Re: She's moving » TherapyGirl, posted by LadyBug on November 5, 2008, at 9:55:00
True we move also. Sometimes closer to family and sometimes further. Phillipa Sorry
Posted by myrtledog on November 5, 2008, at 12:57:18
In reply to She's moving, posted by TherapyGirl on November 5, 2008, at 6:47:16
Oh Therapy Girl my whole heart goes out to you.
(((((Therapy Girl)))))
i do so understand how much pain this is causing. For what it's worth, our situations are identical. My T retired and moved 5 hours away. We did work on lots of really unusual but lovely ways of keeping her feeling close. If you're at all interested, let me know.
I imagine right now you are feeling the hit of being 'left' in the first place.
Grieve Grieve Grieve, and it will get better in time. It won't feel like it now, but it will.
Posted by muffled on November 5, 2008, at 13:52:26
In reply to She's moving, posted by TherapyGirl on November 5, 2008, at 6:47:16
whoah ((((TG))) that must have been a shock :-(
Breathe and work your way thru this like T has taught you.
You can still phone and/or email.
And 5 hrs is far, but not impossible to do now and then.
You likely would not have seen her that often anyways once she retired.
Its hard, super super hard.
But you CAN do this.
T will still be out there.
You can still talk to her.
Its gonna be OK.
((((TG)))
Muffled
Posted by TherapyGirl on November 5, 2008, at 21:27:15
In reply to Re: She's moving » TherapyGirl, posted by sassyfrancesca on November 5, 2008, at 8:45:29
Thanks, Sassy. Yes, she will stay in touch and I'll be able to see her. But we were originally planning to have lunch like once/month to start with, although she doesn't seem to remember that plan now. (How convenient.) I think it will be once every two-three months now. I can't stand thinking about it.
Thanks for the support.
Posted by TherapyGirl on November 5, 2008, at 21:29:16
In reply to Re: She's moving » TherapyGirl, posted by Dinah on November 5, 2008, at 8:50:42
EXACTLY. Part of me is furious with her and yet I don't want to waste what little time I have left being mad. And of course, part of me wants to just sit in her office for the next year. God, I hate this. This has been my biggest fear since we started and she kept telling me she wouldn't leave me. And I know she means in the emotional/connectedness sense, but this is pretty d*mn close to abandonment.
Thanks for always getting exactly where I am with all this stuff. It helps more than you know.
Posted by TherapyGirl on November 5, 2008, at 21:31:10
In reply to Re: She's moving » TherapyGirl, posted by LadyBug on November 5, 2008, at 9:55:00
You are right, of course. But right now it feels like the least do-able thing I've ever tried to do. I have, of course, been following your situation. I read your thread about going to see your T. I started to respond and then realized I felt so conflicted on your behalf that I wasn't going to be very helpful. But I was sending good thoughts your way as you went to your appt. I hope you are able to get what you need from your T.
Posted by TherapyGirl on November 5, 2008, at 21:32:08
In reply to Re: She's moving, posted by Phillipa on November 5, 2008, at 10:15:04
Thanks, Phillipa. It is true that people move, but somehow it doesn't make it less devastating. Sucks, doesn't it?
Posted by TherapyGirl on November 5, 2008, at 21:34:29
In reply to Re: She's moving, posted by myrtledog on November 5, 2008, at 12:57:18
You can't imagine how much your post means to me. I'm extremely interested in what you and your T worked out to keep her close. In as much detail as you have time for.
It really helps to know you have gotten through it. I am indeed feeling very abandoned.
Do you see and/or email/phone your T now? Are you seeing another T?
Posted by TherapyGirl on November 5, 2008, at 21:35:48
In reply to Its gonna be OK ((((TG)))), posted by muffled on November 5, 2008, at 13:52:26
I love you, Muffly. You are so good at talking to my 3-year-old. I think your kids have a very good Mom.
I'm tearing up again, so I have to go now. But thank you more than I can express for being such a good friend to me.
((((((Muffled))))))))
This is the end of the thread.
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