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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 9 of 9. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Quintal on August 16, 2008, at 11:56:57
That resulted in my difficulty forming relationships with other people. It became clear that that my borderline traits are the main difficulty in social relationships besides anxiety. It's this vacillitating between rage and unworthiness that makes stable relationships difficlut, if not impossible. There is an avoidant subtype of BPD and that is probably the model that fits me best.
She also thinks I might be a psychopath, and this is probably what gives rise to my feelings of detachment from other people. T says this sometimes happens when there has been an insecure attachment to a primary caregiver, and it doesn't make me a bad person. We talked about my lack of trust in other people. I said I trust no one, and can't imagine ever trusting anyone. I think she was hurt to find I'd never trusted her from the beginning. We're half way through my allotted ten sessions, so there's not much chance of me beginning to trust her. Again, we're back to what I want out of therapy and how she can help me, and I don't see how she can. We seem to have hit a dead end.
Q
Posted by Dinah on August 16, 2008, at 12:17:41
In reply to T thinks I had an attachment disorder, posted by Quintal on August 16, 2008, at 11:56:57
It does seem rather odd to think that someone can work through attachment problems in a therapy that is fixed from the beginning at ten sessions.
Does she see the irony in that expectation?
Or is working on the attachment something that she does not see in the scope of this therapy.
Posted by Phillipa on August 16, 2008, at 12:48:38
In reply to Re: T thinks I had an attachment disorder, posted by Dinah on August 16, 2008, at 12:17:41
Q you have a conscience thought a psychopath had none? Oh course I don't know this for fact. Phillipa
Posted by seldomseen on August 16, 2008, at 14:52:31
In reply to T thinks I had an attachment disorder, posted by Quintal on August 16, 2008, at 11:56:57
My T says just about everything is a variant of and comes from attachment disorders. I don't trust many people either (used to trust no one). So, I think you are in good company.
I agree with Dinah, it would seem to me to be impossible to form a trusting, stable relationship in a construct that is definately going to end. However, if you think what your therapist says rings true, it may be a good springboard for you to begin your work.
I've been with my T for eight years now. I would say that I pretty much trust him above everyone else. But I gotta tell you. It took a conscious decision on my part to do so. When everything in me said to bolt, run, attack, evade I would still show up at his office and talk it out. It did not come naturally. The hard work was mine to do.
Is there an opportunity for you to develop a stable long term relationship with a therapist or other professional? In my opinion, that is what it's going to take.
Seldom.
Posted by Quintal on August 16, 2008, at 17:37:31
In reply to Re: T thinks I had an attachment disorder, posted by Dinah on August 16, 2008, at 12:17:41
I think that's a pretty standard duration of therapy here - I've had a course of therapy limited to only four sessions in the past. I don't see how that can work either. I think she would give me a few more sessions if we were in the middle of something, but it was clear from the start that this was limited to a very short time frame. They don't seem to see why this might not be enough.
Q
Posted by Quintal on August 16, 2008, at 19:36:34
In reply to Re: T thinks I had an attachment disorder, posted by Phillipa on August 16, 2008, at 12:48:38
I think I have a conscience. I would feel guilty if I hurt someone innocent. And T thinks I have some empathy and compassion, but can't express it properly.
Q
Posted by Quintal on August 16, 2008, at 19:57:03
In reply to Re: T thinks I had an attachment disorder » Quintal, posted by seldomseen on August 16, 2008, at 14:52:31
I formed a better relationship with a counsellor I saw through the college. I was with her for nearly a year. She had a different approach that I liked better. I think it was very hard work for her though, and I think it caused her a lot of pain. I wouldn't want to inflict that on anyone else.
There's no option for long term therapy that I know of. I think it would been seen as a dependence if therapy continued beyond six months or so. Then it comes down to who's footing the bill. I think all professionals are willing to continue a service so long as they're getting a pay check at the end of the session. If that isn't happening then nobody wants to continue working with difficult people for longer than the bare minimum.
Q
Posted by Looney Tunes on August 16, 2008, at 21:40:29
In reply to Re: T thinks I had an attachment disorder » seldomseen, posted by Quintal on August 16, 2008, at 19:57:03
A couple of thoughts:
1) I am not sure you are a psychopath or sociopath because you can feel empathy and say you feel guilt if you hurt someone. You have some moral development. A true psychopath feels no guilt and no empathy. They take pleasure in hurting people. Most mass murderers are diagnosed as psychopaths/sociopaths because they show no remorse or guilt.
However, Anti-Social Personality Disorder is in the SAME cluster as Borderline Personality Disorder; (Cluster B) therefore, some of the traits are the same. But I would not say you are fully diagnosable as Anti-social because you understand and feel guilt.2) MANY MANY MANY people who experience attachment disorders in childhood (insecure, avoidant, disorganized, or RAD) wind up being diagnosed as Borderline. In fact, some theorists believe that Borderline is a result of incorrect attachment in childhood. Makes sense, since most Borderlines have major trust issues, fear abandonment, and are extremely anxious about relationships. There is a movement to call those with Borderline and PTSD =Complex-PTSD as a respect to the fact that these diagnoses usually result from severe abuse or neglect in childhood.
3)Why is it that you only get 10 sessions? If you have Borderline issues, you require LONG-TERM therapy, usually something like psychodynamic in nature. (Some do DBT with success, but it tends to deal with the here and now and skills learning)
Posted by Phillipa on August 17, 2008, at 19:14:35
In reply to Re: T thinks I had an attachment disorder, posted by Looney Tunes on August 16, 2008, at 21:40:29
Agree with above whole heartedly. Q you're not a sociopath by your own descripition of your not wanting to hurt any one. And true I believe about mass murderers. Your'e okay in my book. Phillipa
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