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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 4 of 4. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Daisym on February 12, 2007, at 0:50:55
I'm not sure if that is a good thing or not. I've been thinking about what a strange thing therapy is. It helps with so many of our internal issues and yet it can cause so many issues too. How many hours have I spent being sad because I miss my therapist? Or being upset because he said or did the wrong thing? I guess this goes with the intensity of it all. And perhaps the newness. The difference now is that I'm pretty purely focused on the stuff in my life that is causing me pain. So therapy feels different, less life and death somehow.
Like I said, I'm not sure this is a good thing or not. I just can't figure out why instead of being relieved I feel kind of sad.
Posted by All Done on February 12, 2007, at 1:19:16
In reply to Things are different., posted by Daisym on February 12, 2007, at 0:50:55
> Like I said, I'm not sure this is a good thing or not. I just can't figure out why instead of being relieved I feel kind of sad.
I know exactly what you mean. I'm fairly certain I haven't figured it out, but maybe it has to do with the fact that the "real life" stuff can be so hard and scary and even though your T is there to help you, he isn't *there* in it all with you. For me, there's some comfort in the fact that when I talk to my T about missing him or feeling needy with him, it's like he knows more of what I'm talking about because it's our relationship. If I'm talking about the difficulties I have in my relationship with my mom, for example, it feels lonlier. He's helping, but most of the time I'm out there on my own dealing with it.
And I've learned there's something safe, comforting, and comfortable about knowing it's okay to miss him and need him. Even though I resist it and say it isn't okay.
Maybe this is just my stuff. Sorry if I'm projecting too much. I just went through a phase of not missing my T very much and even contemplating cutting back sessions to feeling like I don't have enough time with him. It happened in a heartbeat and it all confuses me.
Lots of hugs to you, ((((Daisy)))).
Laurie
Posted by sunnydays on February 12, 2007, at 8:43:20
In reply to Things are different., posted by Daisym on February 12, 2007, at 0:50:55
This happens to me sometimes to. I have to run to go to class pretty soon, so I can't write too much, but I get the feeling sometimes. It's harder to talk about real life things for me because what he thinks is totally dependent on what I say. And what if I'm wrong? When we're talking about our relationship, he knows how it feels to him, and I'm not so worried that maybe I misperceive it. But that might not even be an issue for you, I don't know. I do know that I like it when I feel really close to him much better than when I feel like he's farther away. He's more likely to feel farther when we're talking about some stuff in my life. Other stuff, he feels closer. It's hard.
sunnydays
Posted by annierose on February 12, 2007, at 17:25:51
In reply to Things are different., posted by Daisym on February 12, 2007, at 0:50:55
I think it's a good thing.
I know what you mean. When dealing with issues that do not involve our therapist, it is not as an emotionally charged conversation. For me, I don't carry the angst around with me after the session as much. I'm not trying to figure out what I said, what she said, how she said it, the tone, etc.
It's easier to let go and go back to work.
When something comes up for me that directly involves my feelings and/or relationship with my therapist, that chatter is active in my brain. I think it goes back to that little girl that wants to please her mommy and make sure she is okay.
It ebbs and flows, that is for sure.
This is the end of the thread.
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