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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by annierose on September 12, 2006, at 16:08:20
say something to your T and after the words come tumbling out of your mouth, you are temporary shocked at the feelings that come along side those words .... and then ... the T doesn't realize how emotionally loaded that sentence was for you and just carries on as if nothing had just happened?
Well, that happened to me today. I know, I should have back tracked and said something. But I didn't.
It's sad. They really can't read our minds. Sigh.
Posted by Racer on September 12, 2006, at 16:16:50
In reply to Did you ever ..., posted by annierose on September 12, 2006, at 16:08:20
But only because if those emotions come up, they usually come out as choking, sobbing tears... And I usually react to them by saying something like, "wow, didn't know those were there," or "I guess I've got some feelings about that..."
Funny, I was just talking to GG about this -- about not bringing something up with our Ts. In my case, it goes back many years to my old good therapist. One session, she was nodding off all through the session -- she looked sleepy, and her eyes would close, then she would jerk back a few minutes later, but she was definitely falling asleep during my session. And GG made the point that she should have brought it up herself, since she obviously knew she was falling asleep.
Ask me, go ahead and ask me...
Nope, I didn't say a word. I went through all sorts of mortification, about how unworthy I was of her attention, that it wasn't appropriate for me to feel so resentful, etc. But I said not a word.
I hope that now, today, if that happened I would say something like, "Well, I can see that you're not up to this today, so why don't we reschedule?" But then? No way, and the mortification stays with me, at least as a sort of emotional artifact...
I'm sorry you didn't feel up to bringing it up today. Maybe you'll be more able to discuss it next session? Maybe this way you've got some time to sit with it, so that it's easier to discuss?
Posted by Dinah on September 12, 2006, at 16:35:30
In reply to Did you ever ..., posted by annierose on September 12, 2006, at 16:08:20
Yeah. It's happened. Sometimes I don't say anything till the next session (when he has of course forgotten), but lots of times I bring it up right away.
By the way, he restored my Tuesday ten o'clock (since his replacement Tues 10 didn't show on time) and put his cell phone somewhere where he wouldn't be tempted to check who called. And Fri at 2 is wrapping therapy up, so I get dibs on that one too. :)
Therefore, I highly recommend speaking up, even if it's uncomfortable.
Posted by Poet on September 12, 2006, at 18:20:47
In reply to Did you ever ..., posted by annierose on September 12, 2006, at 16:08:20
Hi Annierose,
I haven't had that happen, but since I deny feelings it probably won't ever happen. I have had many regrets leaving a session thinking of all the things I should have talked about and didn't. Like, wait, this is what I actually needed to talk about, can you cancel your next appointment?
Poet
Posted by happyflower on September 13, 2006, at 11:17:31
In reply to Re: Did you ever ... » annierose, posted by Poet on September 12, 2006, at 18:20:47
Hi Poet,
Yeah, I do this too, I usually wait until the last 5 minutes, and say well this is what I wanted to talk about. Dang, now it has to wait for 2 more weeks, which I am sure I will forget it by then. sigh.........
Posted by happyflower on September 13, 2006, at 11:20:26
In reply to Did you ever ..., posted by annierose on September 12, 2006, at 16:08:20
Hi Annie,
When do you see your T next? Does journaling help you? Sometimes I can work things out for myself just by writing stuff down.
Don't be so hard on yourself, you will eventually bring back the subject to your T. ;-) It always has a way of coming around again.
This is the end of the thread.
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