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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 17 of 17. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Dinah on July 13, 2006, at 0:35:06
Now that I'm back to a more stable and more frequent therapy schedule, I'm able to be more productive than I've been in a long time. I feel more stable than I've felt in a long time. I'm on less psych meds than I've been on in a long time.
Even though things really don't feel right during the sessions.
Posted by Dinah on July 13, 2006, at 0:37:10
In reply to It's so strange, posted by Dinah on July 13, 2006, at 0:35:06
I was wondering that as we exchanged gastric reflux stories last session. I was wondering if there wasn't altogether too much comfort there.
Do I really want to know of my therapist's nighttime digestive system activity?
Posted by Racer on July 13, 2006, at 1:07:24
In reply to Is it possible to be too comfortable?, posted by Dinah on July 13, 2006, at 0:37:10
But yes, there is such a thing as an overshare. Even with a therapist.
Still, my cat says it's not possible to be too comfortable, and frankly he should know.
Posted by Daisym on July 13, 2006, at 1:12:52
In reply to It's so strange, posted by Dinah on July 13, 2006, at 0:35:06
All those things sound good. I think being settled, at least for a little while, frees up energy to focus on other things.
You asked above if you could ever go back...I think the answer is no. But forward can lead to a similarly soothing spot. I hope you find it soon.
Hugs,
Daisy
Posted by annierose on July 13, 2006, at 7:35:39
In reply to It's so strange, posted by Dinah on July 13, 2006, at 0:35:06
First things first.
It's good that you are feeling more stable, more productive and more comfortable.
I understand perfectly what you wrote to me in a different post that it feels like once a week therapy twice a week. I have had those sessions and they don't feel productive.
But the two of you need to learn a new dance or two.
I think it just takes time.
Posted by Dinah on July 13, 2006, at 8:12:49
In reply to Re: It's so strange, posted by Daisym on July 13, 2006, at 1:12:52
That's what my therapist says.
I stamp my foot (metaphorically I hope) and tell him that I don't want to go forward. I want things to be the way they were.
And he smiles and says gently that he knows I do.
Now what can I do with that?
Posted by Dinah on July 13, 2006, at 8:19:01
In reply to Re: It's so strange, posted by annierose on July 13, 2006, at 7:35:39
I know it's going to take time. I resent that but I know it's true. I'm a bit frustrated that I don't feel him putting in the energy needed to provide the tension we need to do that. His radical acceptance is deflating that space between us. Even though I like his accepting nature.
I think I might use that metaphor with him. That in order to dance well, there has to be tension in the space between the dancers. Not limpness.
The weird part is that despite all that, it's working. It must really be magic.
I'm a real complainer aren't I? I should just be delighted that we have the opportunity to try again, and grateful that I'm getting by on less medication and doing more work.
Posted by Dinah on July 13, 2006, at 8:22:57
In reply to I asked my cat if that was possible. He says no » Dinah, posted by Racer on July 13, 2006, at 1:07:24
Chuckle. Yes, cats are the ultimate authority on comfort. :)
It all started off innocently enough. I told him I had changed a medication doseage (reducing the risperdal since I'm not needing it) and he asked to be filled in on all my psych and non-psych meds. Then he seemed quite happy to have someone to talk reflux with. This despite the fact that he knows about my phobia, and ironic as it is that I suffer from it, that I probably don't want to hear of his struggles with it in any detail whatsoever.
Posted by Dinah on July 13, 2006, at 8:37:07
In reply to Re: It's so strange, posted by annierose on July 13, 2006, at 7:35:39
Chuckle. I have this picture of my yelling out "Spaghetti arms!" in the middle of the session.
Posted by curtm on July 13, 2006, at 8:58:48
In reply to Is it possible to be too comfortable?, posted by Dinah on July 13, 2006, at 0:37:10
TOO comfortable? I don't think so, but too complacent can happen. Be aware always of the things that might trigger you and always be on the ready to use those "framing techniques" (whatever the hell that is- I havent figured trhat out yet.) As far as your discussions, you are paying for the sessions and if you just want to gab once in a while then there's nothing wring with that. If you want to go back to work, I think T is ready when you are.
They are almost like mirrors aren't they?
I love mirrors.
Posted by Dinah on July 13, 2006, at 9:07:04
In reply to Re: Is it possible to be too comfortable? » Dinah, posted by curtm on July 13, 2006, at 8:58:48
lol. My therapist isn't really a mirror. I guess they all have their own styles, and his definitely is not mirrorlike. Which is ok, because I really don't like mirrors. :)
But you are correct. I could have put my notions of politeness, my genuine liking for my therapist and concern for his health, and my curiosity about his real self aside, and firmly changed the subject when I realized that it was making me uncomfortable. I definitely should have done that.
Posted by curtm on July 13, 2006, at 9:13:44
In reply to Re: Is it possible to be too comfortable? » curtm, posted by Dinah on July 13, 2006, at 9:07:04
Maybe T just needs someone to talk to sometimes and you can offer him some free sessions in exchange for the same? haha
Posted by rubenstein on July 13, 2006, at 10:18:38
In reply to It's so strange, posted by Dinah on July 13, 2006, at 0:35:06
That has happened to me before, just the stableness and knowing that my therapist is there helps. I no longer worry about appointments and such. Perhaps that contributes to our feeling better and less anxious?
rachel
Posted by Jost on July 13, 2006, at 10:54:54
In reply to Re: It's so strange, posted by rubenstein on July 13, 2006, at 10:18:38
Maybe he's trying a desensitization technique? with the gastric reflux details? :)
I don't mind hearing about my T's knee problems--but gastric reflux? maybe too much info.
Jost
Posted by Dinah on July 13, 2006, at 12:02:31
In reply to an idea? » Dinah, posted by curtm on July 13, 2006, at 9:13:44
:-)
Perhaps a support group would be useful for him. I don't imagine reflux comes up in social conversation that often.
Posted by Dinah on July 13, 2006, at 12:03:32
In reply to Re: It's so strange, posted by rubenstein on July 13, 2006, at 10:18:38
Yes, I think that's probably it. It's probably the absence of uncertainty and distress, more than any positives.
Posted by Dinah on July 13, 2006, at 12:05:30
In reply to Re: It's so strange, posted by Jost on July 13, 2006, at 10:54:54
:-) I'd like to think so. Maybe, since he knows of my contamination obsessions, he hopes to create a paradox that I just can't break. My beloved therapist can't possibly be untouchably contaminated.
This is the end of the thread.
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