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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 7 of 7. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by milly on January 18, 2006, at 6:56:23
Hi I'm new but have been watching from afar for quite a while and have been significantly helped by you all. Thanks
It was such a relief to find out I'm not the only one with these issues.
This week with my T I finally managed to tell him that some things he does/says make me angry. He knows they do but I have been unable to vocalize them, normally I just get this massive rock in my stomach and fight and fight to get it under control (I worry that released it might destroy everything in its path including him)
However I chose to talk about the things from the week before, can't actually address them as they arise, and no he didn't vapourize but then again I wasn't actually angry by then. But then he said
T 'see nothing happened, it is possible to hate someone you........... (pause) like.'Like!!Like!! it took weeks to admit to myself and him that it is a lot more than like!!
Really angry now! but of course don't see him till next Tuesday
Milly
Posted by fallsfall on January 18, 2006, at 7:50:05
In reply to love hate relationship, posted by milly on January 18, 2006, at 6:56:23
Good for you for verbalizing your feelings!
Often I start learning something by dealing with it after it happens. Then the next time, maybe I figure it out sooner after it happens. Eventually I can get to recognizing what is going on (and dealing with it) while it is happening, but that is a long process.
Keep it up, and welcome to Babble.
Posted by annierose on January 18, 2006, at 9:45:28
In reply to love hate relationship, posted by milly on January 18, 2006, at 6:56:23
I know how hard it is to contain feelings inbetween sessions, especially when you are working on core issues ... and I go 3x per week. So it must feel overwhelming to wait a week each time.
But it is so important to keep sharing all this stuff. Keep it up and in time, you will feel some relief (or at least, that is the goal).
Posted by lookdownfish on January 18, 2006, at 13:54:51
In reply to love hate relationship, posted by milly on January 18, 2006, at 6:56:23
I can relate: sometimes I don't get angry until afterwards - then I'm beside myself all week waiting to vent next time. I agree with falls though, you can gradually learn to recognise the feelings a bit sooner - that's one of the good things I've learnt in therapy.
Posted by milly on January 18, 2006, at 14:38:52
In reply to Re: love hate relationship » milly, posted by lookdownfish on January 18, 2006, at 13:54:51
Thanks, I just didn't realise that he might expect me to be angry and thought it would come across as ungrateful and that he would 'hate' me for it
He seems the same, even though I had quite a go at him for being inconsistent with smiles and if they are with held it feels like punishment to me and I am then sent mad examining what I could have done to be punished for this time.
Milly
Posted by Dinah on January 18, 2006, at 18:11:37
In reply to Re: love hate relationship » milly, posted by lookdownfish on January 18, 2006, at 13:54:51
Posted by Dinah on January 18, 2006, at 18:13:26
In reply to Re: love hate relationship, posted by milly on January 18, 2006, at 14:38:52
Part of my therapist's goal with me was to teach me that it was ok and safe to get angry with people, or have them angry with you. I think it's an important lesson to learn, though I'm still working on it.
This is the end of the thread.
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