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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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Posted by starlight on October 31, 2005, at 12:59:08
Is there a psychological disorder that includes habitual lying and minimizing. I'm married and have found out that my husband has been lying to me about finances. When the truth finally emerged, the total on credit cards, was frankly unimaginable to me. He lied on three separate occasions about the total and when I got the total, it was ten thousand dollars more than the first one he told me. I really love and care for him, but I've caught him in quite a few lies, especially recently.
He says he wants to work this out and stay together. But I really don't know which way to go with this. I'm pretty heartbroken over it all. Thoughts? Issues? Is there some disorder that would account for the lies? Or am I grasping at straws?
starlight
Posted by allisonross on October 31, 2005, at 13:35:13
In reply to Lying Husband, posted by starlight on October 31, 2005, at 12:59:08
> Hey, sweetie, Starlight. Yes there is, it is called "personality disorder." I'll send you the link tonight.
There is a list of over 86 things, and my EX-husband had almost ALL OF THEM.
After being married for 31 years (abuse), I finally got the courage to get a divorce, and then experienced a kind of abuse I'd never heard of : Spiritual Abuse
(well, you can read my story of you like: www.psychiatricjournal.com...entitled: The Transcendent Child on Overcoming Verbal an Spiritual Abuse
(and my own site: www.churchabusepoetrytherapy.comheas there a psychological disorder that includes habitual lying and minimizing. I'm married and have found out that my husband has been lying to me about finances. When the truth finally emerged, the total on credit cards, was frankly unimaginable to me. He lied on three separate occasions about the total and when I got the total, it was ten thousand dollars more than the first one he told me. I really love and care for him, but I've caught him in quite a few lies, especially recently.
Is he willing to go to counseling?
>
> He says he wants to work this out and stay together. But I really don't know which way to go with this. I'm pretty heartbroken over it all. Thoughts? Issues? Is there some disorder that would account for the lies? Or am I grasping at straws?I don't know if he has a disorder, etc......but there of course, is a REASON why he is doing this. He needs to find out and work through that. It is possible that he has a "personality disorder," but of course I (and no one) cannot know that just by hearing a few thinks.
A good question to ask him: "What behavior/behaviors are you willing to change?"
Counseling would be a good first step; he could be dealing with childhood stuff, etc......no way to know.
Hugs, sweetie; hang in there; e-mail me if you like: wacalice@aol.com
>
> starlight
>
Posted by Susan47 on November 1, 2005, at 18:07:58
In reply to Lying Husband, posted by starlight on October 31, 2005, at 12:59:08
He might have a lying disorder and he might not; either way do you want this?
Posted by fairywings on November 1, 2005, at 23:07:19
In reply to Lying Husband, posted by starlight on October 31, 2005, at 12:59:08
Sounds like he has a spending problem and needs some therapy with you there to be sure the issues are covered, and credit counseling. I'd want to know where the money was spent in case there's another problem you need to know about, like gambling or something. Is he willing to cut up his credit cards, and let you take over all finances?
good luck,
fw
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