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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 12 of 12. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Shortelise on September 30, 2005, at 0:56:02
My T just moved offices and no longer has a receptionist. I am now supposed call and leave a message and the person who books for him is supposed to call me back.
I called on Monday, she finally called today, Thursday, and I missed her call. I need to make an appoinment with him - ok, I *want* to make an appointment - for while my family is here and I'll be working a lot. I would appreciate having him to talk with during that time. The first two and a half weeks in Oct.
But I can't seem to connect with this booking woman, and it's beginning to really upset me. My T only works with private patients two days a week.
I can't see him the first week of October, the following week one of the days he works is a holiday so he won't be working, so there is only one day that week I could see him.But it's hard to get an appointment with him, he's usually booked far in advance.
I am frustrated.
The message she left asked me to leave her another message saying when I wanted an appointment. How can I do that?? I don't know what he has time available, and I would like to book appointments into the next few months as I usualy would do - but it always depends on what time he has avalable compared to when I am available.
I left her a message saying that I would very much appreciate it if she would persist in trying to contact me until she succeeds. I was very nice and friendly.
Eeeek. Not only do I have tons of stressful work, and a scary family visit, but I can't seem to make an appointment with my T!!!!!!!
Panic may set in. I need the safety of knowing he's there when I am in these very very stressful times.
Posted by Annierose on September 30, 2005, at 8:28:34
In reply to New office, new way of booking appointments, posted by Shortelise on September 30, 2005, at 0:56:02
That does sound like a frustrating way to book appointments. Maybe the message you can leave, "I would like to see him on (date). I am available anytime between x and z." I think that is what the "booking" person is asking you ... when are you available. Good Luck, I hope you are able to see him.
Posted by pegasus on September 30, 2005, at 10:21:37
In reply to New office, new way of booking appointments, posted by Shortelise on September 30, 2005, at 0:56:02
Oh, yes, that sounds very frustrating! Especially the part about her not calling back until Thursday! That's terrible.
I liked what annierose suggested. Maybe you can just call and leave all of the days and times that you are available? It might at least streamline the process. But it sounds like that might sound something like:
"I really need to book an appointment the second week in October, although I know he's busy. I'm available MWF from 8 to noon and after 4:00 on T and Th that week. Please see if he can squeeze me in sometime in that window, and let me know as soon as possible. That one is really very important. And then I'd like to schedule two appointments per month in Nov, Dec, and Jan. I'm available on Tuesdays and Thursdays after 3:00, and Mondays before noon, except on November 15 I'm not available at all, and on December 17 I am also available in the morning. Please go ahead and schedule one of those times in each month."
Or whatever your times are. It sounds kind of ridiculous. But what other choice have they left you? Basically, a lot of uncertainty. This sounds like something to discuss with your T.
peg
Posted by Shortelise on September 30, 2005, at 14:32:05
In reply to Re: New office, new way of booking appointments, posted by pegasus on September 30, 2005, at 10:21:37
Maybe I am being unresaonable, and I should just leave a message as you say. I will do this if I have not heard from her by 2 this afternoon.
I left a message this morning explaining that I amb eginning to panic a little and that I would really appreciate a call back. I don'tunderstand why she hasn't called, I really don't. Even if I divided my time in a certain way, I would make an exception and call if this were my job. She works out of her home.
I feel abandonned. I know this is ridiculous, but I really really left out in the cold.
But not crying yet.
THanks Pegasus and Annie.
ShortE
Posted by 10derHeart on September 30, 2005, at 17:08:07
In reply to yes, I guess so, posted by Shortelise on September 30, 2005, at 14:32:05
> Maybe I am being unreasonable...
I don't think so at all. I would feel just as you do, probably worse.
>
> I left a message this morning explaining that I amb eginning to panic a little and that I would really appreciate a call back. I don'tunderstand why she hasn't called, I really don't. Even if I divided my time in a certain way, I would make an exception and call if this were my job. She works out of her home.She should have called. I mean, unless you find out later about some understandable emergency or something. People who work for/with a T. have to be especially sensitive about this. There is no way if a client sounds the least bit distressed they shouldn't be given priority. And when you don't sound distressed, still, you ought to get a return call in 24 hours or less - period.
Something like this happened to me around the 2nd session with the T. I've been seeing for 10 months now. He works alone, and just uses pager, answering machine to handle all calls. He was very ill - too ill to even go to the doctor the first day, so had to canx on me 3 hours prior to the appt. He said he'd call back within 24 hours. Well, I was in a bad way and didn't know him or trust him at all at that time. So I couldn't wait, and called him back after like 10 hours, saying I was very anxious. And you know, he called me right back, from home, still sick, and was lovely about it. He gave my anxiety so much respect, it was amazing. Because he *gets* it - which I'll bet your T. would/will, too. But possibly, this woman does not quite get it.
What you're going through now, is kind of similar to having a new T., though I know you've worked with this one for a long time. But the new setup and place, is *similar* enough to induce fresh anxiety, uncertainly and abandonment.
>
> I feel abandoned. I know this is ridiculous, but I really really left out in the cold.Nope - not ridiculous. I feel it with you.
>
> But not crying yet.((ShortE)) This too, shall pass, it just totally s*cks right this minute...
You wouldn't want to hear the message I might leave her. Stress, fear, worry and need can lead me to be VERY un-10derHeart like! Grrrr!
Posted by thuso on September 30, 2005, at 18:13:43
In reply to yes, I guess so, posted by Shortelise on September 30, 2005, at 14:32:05
Aaarrrgghhh!!!! I just wrote this pulitzer prize winning reply and lost it! :-(
Let's try again...
If you think your T's assistant is taking too long to get back to you, let your T know. He'll talk with her about it. But just make sure that you are aware that you don't know exactly what her job entails. I worked as an assistant to a pdoc for almost two years while a student doing the same job that she does. Every day I would have at least 20-30 calls to make and would recieve 30-40 calls a day. I'd have to give the messages to the pdoc and wait to see what he had to say. Sometimes this would take more than a day...sometimes a few days. You probably don't know all of her responsibilities to your T, so just keep that in mind. Try not to stress too much about it. I'm sure she'll get back to you really soon.
Posted by Shortelise on October 1, 2005, at 2:16:36
In reply to Re: yes, I guess so » Shortelise, posted by 10derHeart on September 30, 2005, at 17:08:07
He has listened to my phone calls, says he can't see me the week of the 10th anyway because of the hoilday and then Yom Kippur. He'll see me early on the 17th, more than halfway through my family visit.
I was silently weeping the whole time I was on the phone with him. Of course he could tell. He asked me if there was anything else after we'd straightened out that he'd see me on that day. I said no, but hey, my entire "family of origin" is coming for a visit, they are coming because I am turning ***50***, and I have a lot of work (work meltdowns and anxiety is what sent me to him in the first place), and, oh, yeah, I can't seem to make an appointment with my therapist. Anything else? Ah, no, I think that's **ENOUGH**, don't YOU????
ARGH!
ShortE
Posted by Shortelise on October 1, 2005, at 2:32:54
In reply to Re: yes, I guess so » Shortelise, posted by thuso on September 30, 2005, at 18:13:43
Thuso, forgive me if I rant, ok?
This person does not work in an office, she works out of her home. My T has about 20 private patients, and several of them he sees inrequently - and no one but his private patients use this phone service.
Her job is to make appointments. She has his appointment book.
If she has too many docs on her plate to be able to return calls in a timely fashion, she should not have so many.
If she is unable to detect an important call when she hears one, then she should be in a different business.
I have called every day for five days, today I left another pleading message and she did not call.
I do not care if she is lying on the floor and can't get up. She should f*cking phone me. There is way too much stressful stuff going on in my life right at the moment for me to get stress from my psychiatrist's answering service.
Sorry Thuso, you know that this yelling is not really direted at you. I am not feeling understanding. I need to be understood, and knowing at the moment that I will not have the support of my T in the midst of all this stress is a lot to face.
ShortE
Posted by Annierose on October 1, 2005, at 8:40:41
In reply to WAIT A MINUTE » thuso, posted by Shortelise on October 1, 2005, at 2:32:54
Shorte-
I am so sorry that he is unable to see you sooner. I'm sure if it wasn't for the Jewish Holidays, he would be able to fit you in. Don't you wish that sometimes they could read your mind and say, "Shorte, I can really hear a lot of pain and stress in your voice. I can come into the office earlier on this day, would that work out?"I know mid-October doesn't seem soon enough when there is so much weighing heavily on your mind. In the meantime, we will be here to support you.
Are you feeling more stressed out about turning 50 or about your family descending upon your home? (The family part would do me in for sure!).
Happy Birthday, even though it doesn't sound like things are going the way you would want.
Posted by thuso on October 1, 2005, at 9:48:03
In reply to WAIT A MINUTE » thuso, posted by Shortelise on October 1, 2005, at 2:32:54
That is why I said (a few times)...tell your T. I'm still not going to come to any conclusions about this person because none of us know why it is taking so long. What if she is trying to contact the T to see if it is ok to squeeze you into a schedule that is booked up? What if she got sick and your T had to take over for a few days, but can't call you right now? And in terms of you thinking she doesn't hear the desperation in your voice, we don't know that either. When I would get a call where the person sounded desperate, I would often save the message so that the pdoc could listen to it himself and decide how quickly to see them. Sometimes the pdoc would just call them to calm them down rather than set up an appointment. There are a million possibilities of why this could be happening. I'm just trying to give you the perspective of the other side so that you can understand that there are times when it is out of the assistant's hand.
That is why you should write the timeline of what is happening and tell your T. Let him deal with it, whether it is telling you why it took so long or talking to the assistant. Try not to stress. That will only make it worse and make it seem like it is taking longer than it is. Some one will get back to you, it is just a matter of when.
Posted by daisym on October 1, 2005, at 20:27:44
In reply to My T phoned » 10derHeart, posted by Shortelise on October 1, 2005, at 2:16:36
Please don't forget that you do have us -- not live and in person -- but we will be here for you and believe me, many of us understand the stress of family. (I'll tell you sometime about my sister and my mother...)
I hate Holidays now! But take comfort in the fact that your therapist called back HIMSELF so he does care and he did ask. You could have, probably should have, told him you were hurting. He is still supportive and still there for you.
I wish things were easier. I know how they can pile on. Join me in my scream to heaven "ENOUGH ALREADY!!!"
Posted by Shortelise on October 2, 2005, at 11:22:45
In reply to WAIT A MINUTE » thuso, posted by Shortelise on October 1, 2005, at 2:32:54
This is the end of the thread.
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