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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by happyflower on June 28, 2005, at 18:14:25
I don't know why, but I just feel so weepy today, and tommorrow is therapy, and I feel so sad. It has been 2 weeks, and I have survived his vacation, but for some reason I don't feel like seeing him. . I feel like I have to start all over again with connecting with him. I think it is going to feel weird being there. I normally look forward to sessions.
But now I feel like I am on the verge of totally opening up my well of tears. I am scared, because I don't like to cry, he has never seen me cry, but why do I feel like I need to do it? Why now when I feel so disconnected to him? But yet I was more connected to him then ever last session. I feel so serious, normally I am playful, but I am just tired of all the Sh@t in my life, and want to just pull the covers over my head. Or I feel like telling him everything on how I feel.
I am sorry I am ranting here, I just don't feel right today. :( There is so much to talk about, I don't know where to start. Maybe he should lead tommorrow and I will take a back seat.
Posted by pinkeye on June 28, 2005, at 18:34:54
In reply to Feels like I am going to cry for the 1st time in T, posted by happyflower on June 28, 2005, at 18:14:25
Of late, you have been doing some questioning of several things in therapy, your marriage, etc. And I think you are a little overwhelmed with questioning many things which you had taken for granted so far.
Also talking about things usually stirs up lot of suppressed emotions. So maybe that is why you are feeling overwhelmed as well.
Also I think maybe you should mention about your attraction to your T.. Mabye that would lead to some good productive discussion on what things are lacking with your husband.
Posted by fallsfall on June 28, 2005, at 20:28:47
In reply to Feels like I am going to cry for the 1st time in T, posted by happyflower on June 28, 2005, at 18:14:25
Returning after a vacation is always really strange. It is not unusual for patients to be angry and silent, or completely lose it, or feel very disconnected. As a veteran of many vacations, I think that what I've found works best for me is to try to be honest. Don't worry about how it will "look". Just worry about being honest. You are having the reaction you are having for a reason. Figuring out why is the purpose of therapy. So don't worry about what you will do or say - just be honest. And it will be all right.
Posted by Jazzed on June 29, 2005, at 6:42:31
In reply to Re: Feels like I am going to cry for the 1st time in T » happyflower, posted by fallsfall on June 28, 2005, at 20:28:47
((((hugs happy)))))
I agree with falls. I know how vulnerable you feel, but I think this is a good time for you to let it out. You HAVE been feeling so much lately, and you have been questioning so many things in your life, and you sure have had some difficulties with your MIL. 2 weeks is a LONG time to go w/o seeing your T. I hope you can reconnect, and I think it will be easier if you allow yourself to be vulnerable with him. He's so kind and compassionate. Wish your appt was 2 hours instead of one.I will be thinking about you!
Jazzy
Posted by spalding on June 29, 2005, at 12:47:53
In reply to Re: Feels like I am going to cry for the 1st time in T » fallsfall, posted by Jazzed on June 29, 2005, at 6:42:31
Yes, many (((hugs))), happy.
I like what falls said about being honest. My pdoc is in the midst of a FOUR WEEK vacation, and I've been thinking of my first appointment with him after he gets back. (We talk about therapy-type stuff as well as meds, I rely upon him very much and we have a great relationship.) I feel like laying it all on the table -- my attraction to him and my fear that he'll abandon me if I "feel better" -- and everytime I think of it, I cry, and I rarely cry with my pdoc or my T.
I think Jazzy is right and some vulnerability is in order. I think it would be cathartic.
Again, love to you, happy.
spalding
Posted by LittleGirlLost on June 29, 2005, at 12:58:52
In reply to Feels like I am going to cry for the 1st time in T, posted by happyflower on June 28, 2005, at 18:14:25
Happy,
I just read your post and can relate to everything you said. Gosh it was if I had written it myself! I, too, have never cried with my T; in fact I can't really cry when I am home alone either. I completely understand your feelings and your position.
So how did it go last night?
lgl
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