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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 13 of 13. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by messadivoce on March 12, 2005, at 1:19:15
I haven't heard from my T since the 3rd. We're coming up on 9 days. I e-mailed her after my Monday meeting disaster, but didn't get any response. I know she was helping a friend who had surgery on the 8th, but don't you think she would be done by now??
Maybe I'm just overreacting. I'm sensitive, in a vulnerable place, and I can really tell I haven't been in therapy for a month. I'm starting to wonder if I should call. Thing is, I'm *technically* not a client anymore. But she has certainly made herself available to me. I don't know what to do.
I just really wish she would e-mail me back. I'm worried that b/c of my meeting, she was threatened or something. I wouldn't put it past them. Oh help.
Posted by gardenergirl on March 12, 2005, at 6:41:21
In reply to Worried, posted by messadivoce on March 12, 2005, at 1:19:15
Oh gosh, what an awful situation they have placed you in. I can't imagine what you are going through. Perhaps your T is busy in helping her friend. Maybe she has decided independently to distance herself for a time. I imagine it's hurting her, too. Maybe they did tell her not to have contact. It's all so confusing.
Do you have other opportunities for getting a new T to help you through this?
gg
Posted by Dinah on March 12, 2005, at 8:00:47
In reply to Worried, posted by messadivoce on March 12, 2005, at 1:19:15
For whatever reason, it may be time to start looking elsewhere for ongoing support.
Do I remember correctly that you don't have much longer living where you are now, and don't feel like it's worthwhile to start over with another therapist?
I'm really sorry. There is no way for this situation to be less than terribly unpleasant.
Posted by messadivoce on March 12, 2005, at 11:33:52
In reply to Re: Worried » messadivoce, posted by Dinah on March 12, 2005, at 8:00:47
When I graduate from college in 2 months, I will move back home, which is still local. I don't want to start over with a university T, b/c I'd only have 2 months. But my current T has told me several times that a private practice looks promising by the end of this month. So that's why I'm still holding on...it's possible I could continue and finish my treatment with her. That's really my first choice. But yeah, if I continue to not hear from her, I know I'm going to have to look for someone else. Just the whole process of T shopping makes me want to go back to bed, though. :-)
Posted by messadivoce on March 14, 2005, at 20:40:45
In reply to Worried, posted by messadivoce on March 12, 2005, at 1:19:15
She sent me an e-mail. She was gone a lot longer than she expected, so that's why I didn't hear from her.
I called her and we talked for almost an hour. Now that my meeting has happened, she felt freer to tell me about the circumstances surrounding her leaving. In respect of her privacy, I will not share them, but I will say that she was basically forced out through no fault of her own, and made the only decision she could really make. It is shameful, the way administration treated her (and me!).
She was very happy to hear from me, and told me to call or e-mail if I needed to. She is still in the process of trying to have a small private practice. I will hopefully be able to see her after I graduate in May.
So that makes me feel lots better.
Posted by annierose on March 14, 2005, at 21:25:10
In reply to We talked, posted by messadivoce on March 14, 2005, at 20:40:45
I'm so glad she called you and you had a nice long chat! That must have felt very comforting. Hopefully she will set up a private practice, that sounds very encouraging. Good News all around!
Posted by 10derHeart on March 14, 2005, at 22:16:35
In reply to We talked, posted by messadivoce on March 14, 2005, at 20:40:45
That is the best news I've heard in a long, long time!! An hour - wow - I'm thinking she is pretty special. And I just knew it, too. Not how, when or where, as we don't have all the control there....but I still had so much faith once you'd been through some degree of suffering, certain things would be restored to you before too long.
I know it's still not all "roses" for you. I imagine you must have a sense of anxiety and longing, even if you bury it, from these back-to-back T. losses. And from wanting the safe haven of a therapist to talk to now. But this sounds so hopeful, and that you'll be able to talk to her again, too.
If you wanted, could she recommend anyone to see between now and May, just on a short-term, interim basis? Not for "deep work" but more to process the trauma involved parting from these T's, if necessary? Maybe you don't want that...I just worry as life is about to change a lot for you and that comes with stress (even though a lot is *good* stress!) Suddenly, a couple months can seem like an eternity...
Whichever way you decide to cope, it's nice to be able to Babble 24/7, right? So happy for you, Voce :-))) -- 10der
Posted by Shortelise on March 15, 2005, at 11:36:35
In reply to We talked, posted by messadivoce on March 14, 2005, at 20:40:45
Voce, I am so glad for you. Your T sounds like she knows you are one of her clients who really must not be trumatized by this change.
There are those who might say there are ethical issues involved, that she left the U and her clients there - for whatever reasons - and she must abide by whatever agreement was made with the admin when she left, and if that included not seeing any clients from there, so be it.
BUT!!! I think she is aware that you have to be an exception to this, and I for one respect her for it.ShortE
Posted by Susan47 on March 15, 2005, at 12:01:25
In reply to We talked, posted by messadivoce on March 14, 2005, at 20:40:45
How wonderful. I hope she rebounds well, and she's helping you to rebound too. She sounds like a person with good inner resources ... a good teacher.
Posted by Dinah on March 16, 2005, at 17:32:18
In reply to We talked, posted by messadivoce on March 14, 2005, at 20:40:45
I'm so glad she's working on setting up a private practice and that you'll be able to see her. It must help a lot with the abandonment feelings that always get stirred up when we get abruptly separated from someone important to us. But she's obviously doing her very best to make clear that she's not abandoning you.
:-)
Posted by LG04 on March 16, 2005, at 17:36:21
In reply to We talked, posted by messadivoce on March 14, 2005, at 20:40:45
Hi voce,
I am so glad for you. for the opportunity to talk with your T, to hear what really happened, and for the possibility of seeing her in private practice. this is just wonderful news. I agree with the others about the possibility of seeing someone very short-term for the next couple of months, just to process a few things?
anyway mostly i'm just glad that you have been able to gather more information and talk with your T.
LG
Posted by messadivoce on March 17, 2005, at 17:47:25
In reply to Re: We talked » messadivoce, posted by LG04 on March 16, 2005, at 17:36:21
I'm really thankful for everyone's encouraging words. I keep telling myself that it's good news that I will probably get to see her again, but waiting is so very hard. I don't ever want to go back to the university counseling center, and I don't want to start over with a new T, even for a few months to just "process" things. I will tough it out and wait for her to get her practice going, but I really really miss her. I think that it has made me miss my old T more too, because I am thinking about him so much more, and wishing I could call him but knowing he wouldn't want it. This from the man who once said, "Call anytime you like." Thank goodness my current T has said that, and really means it, but I just talked to her on Monday and I don't want to bother her again so soon.
Posted by Susan47 on March 18, 2005, at 15:31:21
In reply to Re: We talked » LG04, posted by messadivoce on March 17, 2005, at 17:47:25
(((messadivoce)))
I don't know of any worse pain than that of wanting to be with someone you can't be with.
This is the end of the thread.
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