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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 9 of 9. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by underthecs on May 18, 2004, at 9:40:27
Hi all. Anyone experience what's called "abandonment depression?" If so, how does it feel and how do you deal with it? Does it ever seem to go away?
Posted by spoc on May 19, 2004, at 10:08:20
In reply to BPD/abandonment depression, posted by underthecs on May 18, 2004, at 9:40:27
Hi Underthecs,
I'm sorry to hear that you may have lost or are worried about losing an important relationship. That's so sad, as I know you have already been struggling with some things. I hope this isn't a new layer of complication descending on you now. Maybe things aren't really the way they look? I don't have this dx, but "abandonment depression" sounds like a reaction that could be common to many disorders (or just about anyone really, sometimes); that must be heightened with BPD. I hope you are ok, and have a good T to help you through (and if so, that that relationship isn't what you're feeling this over). I know that you are far from alone in reacting this way over a loss or potential loss. Please take care of yourself!
Posted by terrics on May 21, 2004, at 15:07:55
In reply to BPD/abandonment depression, posted by underthecs on May 18, 2004, at 9:40:27
Hi, I have BPD. I hate to say this, but I almost always am depressed. I was so afraid of my old T. leaving me I made myself sick. I am now trying DBT. If it does not work I am in big trouble.
How are you experiencing this depression? Are you BPD?
Hope you start feeling better. terrics
Posted by DaisyM on May 21, 2004, at 15:51:00
In reply to BPD/abandonment depression, posted by underthecs on May 18, 2004, at 9:40:27
I think one of the classic BPD symptoms is avoiding abandonment at all costs. So depression can be an outgrowth of this concern. But having been abandoned, physically or psychologically in your childhood can cause a disruption to your ability to attached securely and appropriately to someone. Trust comes in to play in a big way.
My Therapist and I talk a lot about this need for security. Too many people left me so I don't trust people with my emotional self. Which is weird because when people say,"are you trusting?" my usual hit is yes, I don't believe people will screw over other people intentionally. But I'm talking about money, jobs, physically hurting them, etc. I'm also talking about strangers...
There are several good books about attachment and adult psychotherapy. I'll try to find the titles again if this is what you were talking about.
Is there a specific issue right now?
Posted by terrics on May 22, 2004, at 16:13:24
In reply to Re: BPD/abandonment depression, posted by DaisyM on May 21, 2004, at 15:51:00
Hi Daisy, Could you post the names of the books on abandonment? I think they will help alot of us. terrics
Posted by underthecs on May 23, 2004, at 21:53:48
In reply to Re: BPD/abandonment depression » underthecs, posted by terrics on May 21, 2004, at 15:07:55
thank you to everyone who responded. i think i am BPD, although my therapist doesn't like to use that label and has yet to say I am. when i speak of abandonment depression, i mean i feel empty and sad and depressed, sometimes suicidal when i am alone. it is hard for me to leave my therapist's office, though he is very understanding. i need him so much more than i can have him and it sucks. so i self-medicate with alcohol, xanax, whatever. i just don't think i will ever get well. and yes, i, too, feel depressed most of the time. it is hard to work full-time in such a demanding job and cope with therapy and all that goes with it. that's all. thanks again everyone and please feel free to expand on this thread. it helps to know i'm not alone, even thought it feels that way most waking moments.
Posted by DaisyM on May 23, 2004, at 22:39:56
In reply to Re: BPD/abandonment depression/Daisy » DaisyM, posted by terrics on May 22, 2004, at 16:13:24
http://www.nmcop.org/AttachmentandAdultPsychotherapy_bookreview3.pdf
Adult Attachment and Couple Psychotherapy: The 'Secure Base' in Practice and Research
by Christopher ClulowHealing Trauma: Attachment, Mind, Body, and Brain
by Marion Fried Solomon (Editor), Daniel J. Siegel (Editor),
Posted by terrics on May 26, 2004, at 15:55:34
In reply to BPD/abandonment depression, posted by underthecs on May 18, 2004, at 9:40:27
Hi again, If you are lonely post here. It helps alot. Also ins. companies do not like the bpd dx. I think everyone writes depression on my forms although I do not know what the DBT group writes. I'll give you my email address as soon as I can find it. I believe I know what you are going through. terrics
Posted by terrics on May 26, 2004, at 16:21:24
In reply to Re: BPD/abandonment depression, posted by underthecs on May 23, 2004, at 21:53:48
If you want you can try this email address. dogsandcatsmany@yahoo.com terrics
This is the end of the thread.
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