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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 21 of 21. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Dinah on March 25, 2004, at 21:24:08
Therapy early early tomorrow morning. Tuesday's session was horrid because I had no real topic and he wasn't really "there". We ended up talking about news events and his new car. Now I'm afraid of a repeat!
Any ideas?
I'm down to considering confessing my sexual fantasies (which aren't about him, but are none of his business), which I've vowed never ever to do!
Heeeeellllllllppppp!!!
Posted by lonelygirl on March 25, 2004, at 21:49:55
In reply to Help! I need therapy topics!, posted by Dinah on March 25, 2004, at 21:24:08
Wow, I guess I envy you... I don't have nearly enough time to talk about everything (not that I would mind talking about his life). I hate how he always has to cut me off at the end. I actually make it a point to look at the clock a lot, just to make sure he knows that I am aware of the time too...
Unfortunately, I don't know you well enough to give you any suggestions. You are supposed to bring up a topic yourself? I would have thought he would have some ideas of things you should work on. Well, I hope you think of something... Sorry I couldn't help you.
Posted by slinky on March 25, 2004, at 21:51:00
In reply to Help! I need therapy topics!, posted by Dinah on March 25, 2004, at 21:24:08
> I'm down to considering confessing my sexual fantasies (which aren't about him, but are none of his business), which I've vowed never ever to do!
>
> Heeeeellllllllppppp!!!Dinah..Hello buttercup
I don't do the therapy thing so maybe I shouldn't be on this board : )
In my opinion sexual fantasies are personal and too special to reveal..it's a corner in the head that is a private retreat and enjoyable.
It's up to you..do you think telling the fantasies would spoil them-?
Unless they are damaging mentally or physically(well they could be physically damaging: ))Maybe keep them secret and safe?
Posted by Dinah on March 25, 2004, at 21:51:14
In reply to Help! I need therapy topics!, posted by Dinah on March 25, 2004, at 21:24:08
By the way. I did, of course, follow my own advice and tell him of my frustration on Tuesday.
He answered that therapy, like everything in life, wasn't always good. That sometimes it would be less than satisfying, because that's the way life is. Either I wouldn't be at my best or he wouldn't, and the session wouldn't go well. And it would be a problem if it was bad most of the time.
I wanted to tell him that that may be fine to tell his wife on occasion, but I'm paying him a day's salary each time I see him.
I should have cancelled for tomorrow. :(
Posted by Dinah on March 25, 2004, at 21:53:21
In reply to Re: Help! I need therapy topics! » Dinah, posted by slinky on March 25, 2004, at 21:51:00
Slinky my dear, you are more than welcome anywhere (as you well know). You're also completely right, and that's what I told him when he asked.
I suppose it's better to endure a few bad sessions than give up that little corner of my head.
Posted by Dinah on March 25, 2004, at 21:58:51
In reply to Re: Help! I need therapy topics! » Dinah, posted by lonelygirl on March 25, 2004, at 21:49:55
Well, I've seen him nine years come April 3. Twice a week for at least a year. That doesn't seem like nearly enough when I'm doing badly. And not even enough when I'm doing well but my head is full of ideas.
But it seems like an endless vista of time when I'm not doing badly and my mind is empty. I threw out a few ideas last time, but like underdone spaghetti, they didn't stick. They plummeted to earth, with limited response. Can't even recall what they were now. I guess I prefer to forget those ideas that go over like lead balloons.
My word! What if I run out of things to talk about with him! It will make my Forever Therapy seem more like a prison sentence than a safe harbor.
Ok, I'm catastrophizing here. One bad session does not a bad Forever Therapy make.
Deep breaths.
Posted by gardenergirl on March 25, 2004, at 22:34:19
In reply to Re: Help! I need therapy topics! » lonelygirl, posted by Dinah on March 25, 2004, at 21:58:51
Hmmm what to talk about, what to talk about. Okay, the question begs--have you talked to him about the times when you feel like you have nothing to talk about?
There's always process to process. That never goes away. Sometimes content does. How about a little process maintenence?
gg
Posted by All Done on March 25, 2004, at 22:39:38
In reply to Help! I need therapy topics!, posted by Dinah on March 25, 2004, at 21:24:08
Dinah,
I know you've been going through pretty difficult family matters lately. Could it be that you're looking for a "break" from the tough stuff? I know you're paying your T good money, but I'd be willing to bet that some of the lighter sessions are worth even more on occassion.
A couple of weeks ago, Beefcake said I was allowed to pi$$ away my session if I wanted to. So, I asked him what color Starburst he was chewing. We spent some time after that talking about my sudden "playfulness" (as he called it) and I thought a lot about my comfort level with him. Turned out to be yet another productive session.
Relax and quit planning. Ask him if he wears boxers or briefs ;).
Take it easy,
All Done
Posted by DaisyM on March 25, 2004, at 22:40:53
In reply to Help! I need therapy topics!, posted by Dinah on March 25, 2004, at 21:24:08
Take some of mine...PLEASE!
I would like you to learn more about differentiation and how it pertains to DID or splitting. I wonder often about this so I want you to teach me.
I wonder how he feels about the news about meds and depression.
I also wonder if you have talked to him about your "savings account" for your son's therapy. I think these concerns could be real substance for discussion. I am amazed when we talk about my kids how quickly we get into deeper stuff about me.
Or you could talk about my new writing assignment. See my post.
Good Luck!
Posted by tabitha on March 25, 2004, at 23:27:24
In reply to Help! I need therapy topics!, posted by Dinah on March 25, 2004, at 21:24:08
Well, if I can't think of anything to talk about, it usually means everything is pretty good. Then we end up talking about how everything is pretty good.
Posted by 64Bowtie on March 26, 2004, at 2:15:14
In reply to Help! I need therapy topics!, posted by Dinah on March 25, 2004, at 21:24:08
(((Dinah))),
Sorry I got here late!
Ask him what "wellness" is supposed to feel like.
Rod
Posted by Pfinstegg on March 26, 2004, at 13:22:06
In reply to Re: Help! I need therapy topics! » Dinah, posted by 64Bowtie on March 26, 2004, at 2:15:14
When someone goes to an analyst, as I do, there's never any question about what to talk about. The answer always is- EVERYTHING that floats into your mind during the hour! Something tells me, though, that this is not a very helpful suggestion for you.
Posted by terrics on March 26, 2004, at 15:57:24
In reply to Re: Help! I need therapy topics!, posted by DaisyM on March 25, 2004, at 22:40:53
Oh no not ANOTHER writing assign ment!
Posted by terrics on March 26, 2004, at 16:03:20
In reply to Help! I need therapy topics!, posted by Dinah on March 25, 2004, at 21:24:08
I vote for All Done. 'Ask if he wears boxers or briefs'.
In reality maybe you could take a couple of weeks off from therapy and build up a supply of therapy material. terrics
Posted by 64Bowtie on March 26, 2004, at 16:50:58
In reply to Re: Help! I need therapy topics! » Dinah, posted by All Done on March 25, 2004, at 22:39:38
Beefcake, Bean, etc.
Posted by Karen_kay on March 26, 2004, at 20:20:53
In reply to Help! I need therapy topics!, posted by Dinah on March 25, 2004, at 21:24:08
Dinah
I arrived WAY too late to help, but in the future you could always talk about the lack of genitalia Big seems to possess. And why that is. I know you've discussed this before but where have you gotten with it? I'm always interested in this topic. If nothing else you could always report the results back to me. Just send the therapy bill to kid :)And again, if you don't have anything to talk about, that's a wonderful thing!!! (Unless of course it's me, that means I'm avoiding, avoiding, AVOIDING!!!!!)
Posted by Dinah on March 26, 2004, at 20:54:05
In reply to Re: Help! I need therapy topics! » Dinah, posted by Karen_kay on March 26, 2004, at 20:20:53
And that's the important thing. :D
Maybe that's one of the more interesting things I learned in session today. I had nothing more planned this time than last but it was a great session. It's just that this time he was fully present and interacting. And Tuesday he wasn't.
So despite what he says, my therapy is NOT all my responsibility. It's a two person endeavor and both people need to be in the room.
Posted by gardenergirl on March 26, 2004, at 23:37:31
In reply to Re: It wasn't MY fault, posted by Dinah on March 26, 2004, at 20:54:05
> So despite what he says, my therapy is NOT all my responsibility. It's a two person endeavor and both people need to be in the room.
Amen to that.
gg
Posted by fallsfall on March 27, 2004, at 7:35:25
In reply to Re: It wasn't MY fault, posted by Dinah on March 26, 2004, at 20:54:05
I'm so glad this one was better.
Posted by Dinah on March 27, 2004, at 22:17:04
In reply to Re: It wasn't MY fault » Dinah, posted by fallsfall on March 27, 2004, at 7:35:25
Oh Falls, It really was. :) It was one of those sessions that felt like a gift to me. A gift of himself.
Except that I paid for it of course.
Ok, enough cynicism.
I don't know whether I had pleased him somehow, or he felt guilty about being absent on Tuesday, or he was just in a really good mood. But he really felt relaxed and comfortable with me, and shared some stuff that I think will be good for my therapy. It involved judicious self disclosure of his feelings towards the therapy.
He's really *good* sometimes. :)
Posted by All Done on March 28, 2004, at 3:29:48
In reply to Re: It wasn't MY fault » fallsfall, posted by Dinah on March 27, 2004, at 22:17:04
Dinah,
It's so nice to hear that you had a good session. I know you work hard and you deserve all the good ones you can get.
Take care,
All Done
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