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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Anna C. on October 29, 2003, at 20:28:35
I shot myself a couple years ago during a really bad depression.I survived somehow.But afterwards I couldn't find any therapist in my state or the 2 surrounding states who would work with me.They all kept saying the same thing that they were not comfortable working with me.The one I had at the time of the shooting came to the ICU unit to personally fire me.Talk about feeling rejected!I thought that these people chose the counseling field to help people like me.Was wondering if anyone else ever experinced this.I finally found a doc 3 yrs. later when she had an opening she wasn't even able to find someone for me and had become angry and frustrated.
Posted by deirdrehbrt on October 29, 2003, at 21:11:33
In reply to wondering if anyone else has experinced this, posted by Anna C. on October 29, 2003, at 20:28:35
Anna,
How absolutely horrible that must have made you feel! I think that the sort of behavior you witnessed from these so-called professionals was uncalled for.
The first thing that I would mention is that your first therapist, the one that came to the hospital, did not fire you. She quit; plain and simple. You were paying her salary, not the other way around.
I didn't have the same experience as you. I too have made serious attempts at suicide. I don't think that I had any therapists quit working with me because of it, but I did have one call me while I was in the hospital to tell me she was leaving the agency. I have had a case manager fail to show up at the hospital after he had told me he would be there.
When professionals let you down, you can seriously wonder if the cards aren't stacked against you.
I hope that you have a therapist who is willing to work with you now. Maybe some are worried about liability. Maybe some are frightened by the seriousness of your attempt. I don't know, and can't speak for them. What I do know is that you deserve help, and the best that you can get.
I am glad that you are here. Take care of you, you truly deserve the best there is.
Dee.
Posted by Dinah on October 30, 2003, at 8:00:13
In reply to wondering if anyone else has experinced this, posted by Anna C. on October 29, 2003, at 20:28:35
I once decided to fire my therapist, and sounded visibly.... upset when calling the person who had been referred to me. She didn't seem at all keen on seeing me, and wouldn't unless she first got an evaluation from the pdoc she worked with. I suspect that she screened potential patients for their potential trouble to her.
I'm torn on the practice of doing that. If they're screening out all patients who might be challenging and emotionally draining, I think they just may be in the wrong job. But I've seen a lot of advice in therapy books for therapists not to take on too many challenging clients at one time for fear of burnout. And I'm guessing that suicidal can be stressful and challenging to a therapist.
Mine has an emotional detachment (self protective I'm sure, and I empathize with him). But my picture was always of him looking at me and cooly saying that he wished I had made a better choice before walking away, unaffected and mildly disapproving. My biggest therapy breakthrough came when I happened to see him wince when I discussed my plan. It made me trust that he might actually mind if I went through with it. Or maybe his foot was asleep and it was just a happy coincidence. :)
I am entirely less clear on why a therapist would desert a person who was already a client at their most vulnerable. The most charitable explanation I can think of is that he thought that he had clearly failed to help you sufficiently, and that it would be better for you to have a therapist who could be more helpful.
Posted by justyourlaugh on October 30, 2003, at 8:07:57
In reply to Re: wondering if anyone else has experinced this » Anna C., posted by Dinah on October 30, 2003, at 8:00:13
dinah..
i totally agree,,
but i do think it is up to the "professional "to find someone that can help before letting one"go".
my md said "i cant help you with this...i feel i am not quaified..go to the er..."
best advice that i took..because it put me intouch with someone that could help me...
dont lose hope...
as in any profession or trade..
some are horrible at what they do..
some are genius..
j
Posted by Dinah on October 30, 2003, at 8:36:31
In reply to Re: wondering if anyone else has experinced this, posted by justyourlaugh on October 30, 2003, at 8:07:57
You are absolutely right. No matter how unable to be helpful a professional might feel, there's no reason to not help the patient find someone else and make sure that they have had contact with someone appropriate.
I'm glad your doctor's advice worked out for you. And it sounds as if he put it in a helpful way.
Yes, there are some really really bad professionals out there. Unfortunately, we too frequently don't know it till we're in their care and feeling attached. :(
Posted by deirdrehbrt on October 30, 2003, at 18:51:42
In reply to wondering if anyone else has experinced this, posted by Anna C. on October 29, 2003, at 20:28:35
Anna,
I thought I would mention your post to my therapist today. She did say that liability was a major consideration in dealing with people who make serious attempts at suicide. The other thing that she spoke about was the amount of energy that it takes to work with seriously ill patients, and that a suicide attempt of that nature puts a great deal of pressure on the therapist.
She also used this opportunity to remind me that my last attempt was very serious. I think she wanted me to know that when I am like that it is a great deal of stress for her. It makes sense.
I hope you are doing better now. Thank you for the opportunity to discuss this with my therapist.
Dee.
This is the end of the thread.
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