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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 9 of 9. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by judy1 on October 10, 2003, at 11:04:50
all the recent posts on transference have really triggered a lot of very negative memories for me. this stuff with my ex-shrink occurred over 3 years ago, and i have spent countless sessions dealing with it- with psychiatrists, a psychologist and social worker, but it just comes flooding back. it has created a huge block with my present psychatrist, I recognize my anger isn't towards him, rather my ex-shrink, but that doesn't prevent it. how many years is this going to take before i can finally put it behind me? i imagine that's a rhetorical question, unless someone else has gone through this? thanks- judy
Posted by tinydancer on October 10, 2003, at 12:57:24
In reply to dealing with therapist's transgressions, posted by judy1 on October 10, 2003, at 11:04:50
Judy I for one would be interested in hearing your story about what happened if you would like to share. I have never had any type of strong feelings towards any of the therapists I have had, this T I have now is the first one in my 13 years of therapy! Hope you will share more with us so we can better understand the situation and how it was for you.
Posted by fallsfall on October 10, 2003, at 19:44:28
In reply to dealing with therapist's transgressions, posted by judy1 on October 10, 2003, at 11:04:50
You have such a hard job to do. It sounds to me like you are dealing with it admirably. Since we give such power to our therapists, they can hurt us very deeply - I think as deeply as our parents. Try to remember that just because your therapist was unethical doesn't mean that all of them are (nor are all people). It must be so hard for you. I think the best suggestion I can give you is to talk about it until you feel better with your current therapist ("I'm having a hard time talking you you because my old therapist did ..."). Hopefully, he can help you understand what happened - it was a form of abuse. If you feel uncomfortable with your current therapist at any time, I would think that you should get a consultation (in fact you might want to ask him for a referral for a consultation now so that you will be prepared if you should need it in the future - or get a referral from someone else if you would feel more trusting that way). I wouldn't be surprised if you lost confidence in your current therapist at some time.
Maybe forego Psychological Babble, and stick to Social for a while?
Take care of yourself, and let us know how we can help.
Posted by judy1 on October 11, 2003, at 10:47:30
In reply to Re: dealing with therapist's transgressions, posted by tinydancer on October 10, 2003, at 12:57:24
I went through many of the same emotions I have seen on this board towards my ex-shrink. Feelings of love, dependency, even sexual attraction. Well I got my wish and those feelings were reciprocated, and it went to a physical level. Once he realized what he had done, he told me he could no longer treat or see me, gave me the name of another shrink, and I attempted suicide. I've written this story before on this board but I know many of you are new readers. I just say beware of the 'slippery slope', all those things listed by the psychologist? on the board that Dinah was on were very true. There is an inherent power imbalance, as a childhood abuse survivor we are wide open to this type of thing happening. I do have to add that this is the only time in the almost 20 years of different therapists that this has ever happened. take care, judy
Posted by judy1 on October 11, 2003, at 10:56:15
In reply to Re: dealing with therapist's transgressions » judy1, posted by fallsfall on October 10, 2003, at 19:44:28
thanks for the suggestions, I think even my ability to tell what happened has demonstrated that I have come a long way. I do have a female therapist in addition to my shrink, but I think my male shrink will be the one to get me through this. He has the strongest boundaries of anyone I've ever seen- physically he is very careful with me, but he is available to me by phone 24/7 (which I've only used once in three years- a 3am suicide call). I just worry so much about some posters, I don't want them to go through what I did- but I do have to acknowledge that there are many good therapists out there. I believe I read a poll that said well over half of therapists had had sex with their patients- did I get that wrong? Perhaps it was in a book, and it was an anonymous poll. That's a pretty scary statistic, I hope I'm wrong. Take care, judy
Posted by Dinah on October 11, 2003, at 11:04:34
In reply to Re: dealing with therapist's transgressions » fallsfall, posted by judy1 on October 11, 2003, at 10:56:15
If I remember correctly, it was more like 20% at one time and falling in recent polls. Which is a good sign, at least. And that may have only been with one client with a lot of them. Others probably do it serially.
It is important to have a therapist you can trust, and to test that trust incrementally rather than trusting all at once. I am so sure that my therapist would never cross a single boundary, and only partly because I'm unattractive. :)
I also am beginning to trust that he will never terminate me against my will unless he leaves private practice, moves, or dies. Which is a huge one for me with my abandonment issues. Now I just have to come to terms with the moves, leaves, and dies scenarios.
Posted by Dinah on October 11, 2003, at 11:08:39
In reply to Re: dealing with therapist's transgressions » fallsfall, posted by judy1 on October 11, 2003, at 10:56:15
Behaviors That Are Rare
One of the most surprising results was that only 1.9% of the respondents reported engaging in sexual contact with a client and that only 2.6% reported engaging in erotic activity (which may or may not involve actual contact) with a client. Previously, there have been three national surveys of sexual intimacies between psychologists and their patients. Holroyd and Brodsky (1977) reported 7.7% respondents "who answered positively any of the questions regarding erotic-contact behaviors or intercourse during treatment." Pope, Levenson, and Schover (1979) found that 7% of the therapists in their survey reported engaging in sexual contact with their clients. Pope et al. (1986) reported that 6.5% of their respondents acknowledged engaging in sexual intimacies with clients.It is difficult to explain the discrepancy between the current findings and those of the previous three studies. It may be that respondents are now less willing to admit, even on anonymous survey, to a behavior that is a felony in some states, or it may be that these findings are reflective of random sampling error or bias in return rate rather than of a change in behavior.
However, the current findings may indicate an actual decrease in the percentage of psychologists engaging in sexual intimacies with their patients. The increasing publicity given to the consequences of therapist-patient sexual involvment (Bouhoutsos, Holroyd, Lerman, Forer, & Greenberg, 1983; Feldman-Summers & Jones, 1984; Pope & Bouhoutsos, 1986), as well as the vivid first-person accounts of patients who have been sexually involved with their therapists (Freeman & Roy, 1976; Plaisil, 1985; Walker & Young, 1986), may be significantly altering the behavior of psychologists who are tempted in this area. For additional information on this topic, see Pope, Sonne, and Holroyd, 1993; Pope, 1994, 2000.
Some other items concerning sexual behaviors- such as nudity as part of therapy or using sexual surrogates with clients-also had extremely low rates. Engaging in sex with a clinical supervisee was reported by only 3.4% of the respondents. This figure corresponds closely to the 4.0% in a prior survey of APA Division 29 members who reported engaging in sexual intimacies with their clinical supervisees (Pope et al., 1979).
http://kspope.com/ethics/research4.php
Posted by judy1 on October 11, 2003, at 21:19:42
In reply to Re: dealing with therapist's transgressions » judy1, posted by Dinah on October 11, 2003, at 11:04:34
thanks for posting those statistics, Dinah. I'm really glad that the rate is decreasing so much- although 1 or 2 therapists per a hundred is still 1 or 2 too many. I've really come a long way from blaming myself to an anger stage right now- that's probably a lot healthier.
do you really think about the scenarios you described with your therapist? his death, moving away, etc. have you worked on your abandonment fears? that used to be so huge for me, attempting suicide (a very serious attempt) was a pretty strong reaction to my ex-shrink dropping me. now I know I will never get that dependent again on anyone. as much as I truly like my shrink of 3 years now, I could easily go without ever seeing him again. there must be some medium ground to this- I know shrinks move and although their clients are sad they work through it and move on to the next therapist.
well something to think about. take care, judy
Posted by Dinah on October 11, 2003, at 21:53:31
In reply to Re: dealing with therapist's transgressions » Dinah, posted by judy1 on October 11, 2003, at 21:19:42
You're right of course, Judy. One is one too many. And the pain to the client is the same.
I think you have a team you can trust now, and you eventually will trust them enough to let them help you. Maybe you'll never trust them to the extent I trust my therapist, or depend on them as much. And probably that's more than ok.
I don't worry about the worst case scenarios as much any more. And on my healthier days I think I may be able to take what I learned from him and move on. Then on my unhealthy days, I think the way I always did. Oh well. Some progress I guess as I get less afraid that he'll abandon me on purpose (or on purpose related to me anyway).
I may be to the point where I might possibly forgive a death.
This is the end of the thread.
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