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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 15 of 15. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by underthecs on August 24, 2003, at 14:11:11
how?
Posted by BekkaH on August 24, 2003, at 20:08:55
In reply to surviving therapist vacations, posted by underthecs on August 24, 2003, at 14:11:11
> how?
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1) Go on a vacation yourself, at least for part of the time. Spend time with friends. Log onto PB and other Internet sites you enjoy. Pet your cat and listen to it purring. Pet your dog, and delight in its tail wagging.2) Use it as an opportunity to prove to yourself how much you have internalized and learned. See how self-sufficient you really are. Remember that just as the best teachers teach us how to teach ourselves, the best therapists "teach" us how to be our own therapists. Practice being your own therapist.
3) Rent some funny movies, including some about therapy, such as ANALYZE THIS, WHAT ABOUT BOB?, THE PRESIDENT'S ANALYST, THE DON'S ANALYST. By the way, I think ANALYZE THIS is really good, but the sequel, ANALYZE THAT is mediocre, so make sure you rent the original one, ANALYZE THIS. Another funny movie, with pet therapy but no people therapy, is DOWN AND OUT IN BEVERLY HILLS. Nearly all Woody Allen movies, especially the earlier ones from the 70's and 80's, have lots of references to therapy since Woody Allen has been "on the couch" for most of his life (never mind that he's still a screwball). More funny movies are: MY COUSIN VINNY, YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN, and THE BIRDCAGE.
4) Don't deify your therapist, especially when he/she is away. As someone who grew up in a family of doctors, I can assure you that psychiatrists and other therapists are only human. They have LOTS of problems, and they burp and f**t, just like the rest of us.
They are not gods, they never have been and never will be. They really don't know anything about you that you don't already know. They help you find and recognize the answers that are within yourself. Use the vacation to prove how much you can do on your own.5) Exercise. It's a great antidepressant and anti-anxiety agent. Walk, run, swim, dance, play tennis, or whatever makes you feel better.
6) Enjoy, pet and play with your pets. If you don't have one, get one.
7) If you're having a really rough time, don't hesitate to call the doctor who is substituting for your therapist.
8) And last, but definitely not least, rejoice at the thought of all the money you'll be saving!!!
Posted by Dinah on August 24, 2003, at 22:02:56
In reply to surviving therapist vacations, posted by underthecs on August 24, 2003, at 14:11:11
I usually take a Risperdal, then go into emotional hibernation for the duration. I avoid any situation which might be the slightest bit upsetting. Mine is on a one week business trip, but due to a change of plans will be back friday.
how long is yours gone for?
Posted by Dinah on August 24, 2003, at 22:03:57
In reply to Re: surviving therapist vacations » underthecs, posted by Dinah on August 24, 2003, at 22:02:56
Oh, and I didn't say mine was a healthy way of coping. :)
Posted by Penny on August 24, 2003, at 22:14:39
In reply to surviving therapist vacations, posted by underthecs on August 24, 2003, at 14:11:11
Ummmm....grin and bear it?
Seriously - if you're really worried about your stability while the T is away, perhaps you can see a substitute T or at least have the number of one you can call if needed.
If not, use the time you would normally be in therapy (for me it's Tuesday and Thursday evenings) for something relaxing yet productive - journaling, painting, having coffee and shopping for books, etc. Or do something that reminds you of your therapist - I did this when my therapist was on maternity leave - I would go to Barnes & Noble and order her favorite drink (frappucino) at the cafe. Then I'd sit and journal and miss her. It was really hard, but I got through it.
Posted by fallsfall on August 24, 2003, at 23:46:03
In reply to surviving therapist vacations, posted by underthecs on August 24, 2003, at 14:11:11
Watch the video "What about Bob".
Also check these threads.
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20030711/msgs/244934.html
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20030711/msgs/245660.html
Good luck! Let us know how it is going.
Posted by underthecs on August 25, 2003, at 19:12:40
In reply to Re: surviving therapist vacations » underthecs, posted by Dinah on August 24, 2003, at 22:02:56
> how long is yours gone for?until 9/9! which seems like forever to me. he has always been there, in person, by phone, or by email. and now it's just all gone. so now i feel so much rage for him that i don't ever want to go back to therapy. sorry for being such a downer. i appreciate all of your responses. thanks.
Posted by fallsfall on August 25, 2003, at 21:51:12
In reply to Re: surviving therapist vacations » Dinah, posted by underthecs on August 25, 2003, at 19:12:40
How long have you been seeing him? Is this your first therapist? Did you talk about what to do during his absence? Is there someone covering for him? Do you have a pdoc you could see in that time (or a GP, or anyone else who can take care of you)?
Vacations are really tough. It seems like it shouldn't be a big deal, but it is a big deal.
You are angry that he has abandoned you? I know that abandonment issues are a biggie for me. I don't have a solution yet - sorry!!!
Please know that you aren't alone. If you tell us more, we'll listen and probably understand because we've been there, too. Don't be afraid to ask for help - either from us or from local people you know.
Posted by allisonf on August 25, 2003, at 22:28:05
In reply to Re: surviving therapist vacations » underthecs, posted by fallsfall on August 25, 2003, at 21:51:12
Hang in there! I am in with everyone else who has said to contact the on-call therapist if necessary. A few weeks ago my therapist was away and I didn't want to call the on-call b/c I thought she would interrupt my therapist's vacation. People on this bd were kind of enough to convince me to use the on-call if I needed to. I did and it really helped me. Not quite like the original, but it got me thru the day. Good luck to you--A
Posted by underthecs on August 26, 2003, at 20:13:34
In reply to Re: surviving therapist vacations » underthecs, posted by fallsfall on August 25, 2003, at 21:51:12
> How long have you been seeing him? Is this your first therapist?
about 8 months; yes, he's my first therapist
he usually just takes long weekends, which never interferes with my visits. and he is always available by cell or email. it's just that this time he is out on the ocean and will not have cell service, i guess. either that or he does not want to be bothered. he does have someone covering for him, but i don't think it will help to talk to anyone else. i'm having this horrible transference thing that is making it all seem worse than it probably is. feels so crazy.
i just can't stop crying and i want to be dead. this is so horrible. i had no idea it would be so bad.
Posted by fallsfall on August 26, 2003, at 21:39:03
In reply to Re: surviving therapist vacations, posted by underthecs on August 26, 2003, at 20:13:34
I'm sorry it is so hard for you.
I have talked to other people when my therapist has been away, and I really was quite surprised at how much it helped. I would describe the specific problem I was having (with enough background so it made sense) and they would help me figure out how to deal with it. If its the kind of thing that you really can't change, the therapist can at least help you figure out how to survive until your therapist comes back.
There was one time when my therapist was on vacation. I called the woman covering for her and we decided that I would go into the hospital. Then the day I got out of the hospital my therapist was called out of town for a family emergency. So I saw the woman covering for her to help me get aclimated back into the world. She asked my therapist about me periodically, and I asked about her, too. I feel that she took good care of me.
Let us know how you do! Good Luck
Posted by Adia on August 26, 2003, at 23:29:12
In reply to surviving therapist vacations, posted by underthecs on August 24, 2003, at 14:11:11
Hi..
I'm pretty new here and I feel a bit shy to post, but I read your post and I struggle with the same and it hurts soooooooo much.
I have huge abandonment issues and when my T leaves I just don't know how to feel her close or how to feel she is not leaving me and she will be back and I won't lose the safety I have with her. I get scared that I will lose what I have accomplished with her. She leaves sometimes for 15 days and in the summer she leaves for a month and a half!!!
What I do, is to talk with her, before she leaves...and share my feelings and fears with her...and sometimes I ask her..if i am brave to risk rejection..if she can help me feel her close somehow during her time away..like telling me a book she has liked...or a movie..that way, if i can read something she has truly liked then I feel protected in a way..or close to her. She has also shared her favourite music, and so I listen to that and it helps in my heart to feel her close..or I write to her, or send her a card...
I try not to feel and just get through the days...it's not easy..:-( I've been taking meds for a year now and if i am really having a hard time or don't know how to stop crying I call my psychiatrist...she helps me survive till my T is back..
Mostly I try to find ways to feel connected to her...and then I try to get through the days without feeling much..
I am sending you all my support,I know how hard and painful it is..
Adia.
Posted by stebby on August 27, 2003, at 20:37:57
In reply to Re: surviving therapist vacations, posted by underthecs on August 26, 2003, at 20:13:34
I feel for you. Sometimes I just don't get it. You go to atherpaist thinking its going to help you and you end up in more pain due to the attachment. I've been waiting for my T to get back from a 3 week vaca. Only one more week to go. Why are we all so crazy?
Posted by jane d on August 27, 2003, at 21:54:48
In reply to Re: surviving therapist vacations, posted by stebby on August 27, 2003, at 20:37:57
Is it some secret gathering deep in the woods of a National Forest? Discount group charters to Europe?
Or is it because, for those that do work in clinics, the new interns have arrived and have had a little time to settle in?
Or is the August vacation just a myth?
Jane
Posted by underthecs on September 2, 2003, at 1:44:29
In reply to Re: surviving therapist vacations - underthecs, posted by BekkaH on August 24, 2003, at 20:08:55
> 4) Don't deify your therapist, especially when he/she is away.how do you do that? i think it's too late for me.
This is the end of the thread.
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