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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 22 to 46 of 71. Go back in thread:
Posted by sleepygirl on March 31, 2006, at 17:25:46
In reply to The post to JYL should be DELETED!!!!!, posted by wildcard11 on March 31, 2006, at 10:55:24
Posted by TofuEmmy on March 31, 2006, at 17:31:29
In reply to The post to JYL should be DELETED!!!!!, posted by wildcard11 on March 31, 2006, at 10:55:24
If I've followed this saga correctly, one of the deputies deleted the post - apparently without Bob's agreement. And then Bob dug it up from it's grave. Right?
Bob appears to be a bit...um...how do I say this nicely....controlling? So, I'm guessing that the deletion really annoyed Bob. Perhaps that is why he isn't backing down.
emmy
Posted by madeline on March 31, 2006, at 18:31:35
In reply to Re: The post to JYL should be DELETED!!!!!, posted by gabbi~1 on March 31, 2006, at 15:26:24
I don't know. The more we talk about that horrible post, the more power it still has, over JYL and us all.
I wonder if it might be better if we just left well enough alone.
JYL what do you want us to do?
Posted by special_k on March 31, 2006, at 19:06:22
In reply to Is this helping or hurting JYL?, posted by madeline on March 31, 2006, at 18:31:35
polls tend to be divisive
(however you spell that)
just something i've learned...i think the general notion is that...
it is one thing to express support for the poster
(which people have been doing)and it is another thing to start going off to bob about it
(which tends to lead to blockings)re being controlling.
hahahahahahah
i've been making the same observation.
bob doesn't want people to help him moderate the boards...
he wants people to read his mind and do what he would do were he here...
he wants people to step in to support him when the boards seem to be turning against him...
i don't think he knows quite what he wants re the deputies.hence the fun and games around their appoitment.
sigh.
just please god don't let things turn into the little group of moderators looking out for the slightly bigger but still small group of 'annointed people' like there is at this other site i know...
sigh.
still... if things get wound up...
maybe bob will come back?
?
maybe...
Posted by madeline on March 31, 2006, at 19:14:16
In reply to Re: Is this helping or hurting JYL?, posted by special_k on March 31, 2006, at 19:06:22
I hear what you are saying and do understand.
I was hoping instead of a poll, JYL could express an opinion. It's totally up to her though.
Posted by Dinah on March 31, 2006, at 19:25:40
In reply to Re: Is this helping or hurting JYL?, posted by special_k on March 31, 2006, at 19:06:22
You don't really think that would happen, do you?
I really do try to do only what I think Dr. Bob would do, and if I'm in doubt I try to err on the side of doing less. I couldn't be a deputy otherwise. It would be too much like being poor Dr. Bob.
And I do give friends PBC's.
Posted by special_k on March 31, 2006, at 19:48:24
In reply to Re: Is this helping or hurting JYL? » special_k, posted by Dinah on March 31, 2006, at 19:25:40
> You don't really think that would happen, do you?
the small group of moderators looking out for their friends? no i don't think it would. but it is what i see happening at another site i know (in fact i have been sent personal messages by a variety of people to that effect 'you know your posts get deleted because a couple of people in the inner circle have decided they don't like you and so all they have to do is complain or escalate your threads and they get locked / deleted so you better be nice to them or you will just keep on getting locked / deleted'). i thought they were full of it for a while... but now i see... yeah they are full of it... but you know what... they are also right. correctomundo. that is how things seem to work. and the main moderator has just kind of pulled back and left them to it except to go off (i mean really go off) 'how dare you come to my site and plagarise...' not that i was but you get the general gist. and no i don't think things would be like that here... but i don't know i don't know.
> I really do try to do only what I think Dr. Bob would do, and if I'm in doubt I try to err on the side of doing less. I couldn't be a deputy otherwise. It would be too much like being poor Dr. Bob.yeah. so being a deputy is like being dr bob?
that is kind of my point. being a deputy isn't like being dinah. and doing what dinah thinks is best. and getting some respect from bob on that score. being a deputy is like being dr bob.have you heard the story about the plum who tried to be a peach or whatever.
sigh. i dunno.
see... you guys would be best to study the faq's than read a book on civility. because it is all about trying to do what dr bob would do were he here... and we know he has a very idiosyncratic notion of civility huh? i mean when a guest expert on conflict resolution comes close to being branded uncivil... that kind of tells you that dr bob has a very idiosyncratic notion of civility indeed...
and that is fine that is his perogative.
but when people get blocked for lengthy periods of time...
when he can't even let auntiemel delete this post (he granted she had good reason) it was just that it wasn't what he wanted to do. well imo that shows immense disrespect for auntiemel and i think kudos for her for showing a bit of initiative and having a mind of her own.
sigh.
you know i have immense respect for you dinah. always.
> And I do give friends PBC's.
of course you do.
i know you do.and i know you would block me if i seriously crossed the line.
and i respect you for not being too quick to jump the gun as well...
my bugbear isn't with the deputies / prospective deputies...
it is with bob...
Posted by wildcard11 on March 31, 2006, at 19:57:56
In reply to Re: Is this helping or hurting JYL? » special_k, posted by madeline on March 31, 2006, at 19:14:16
JYL has spoken and Dr.Bob did not "hear" her...Auntie Mel did though. As a poster here, if i were in this situation, i would feel good that people here took a stand for me. "WE" made a difference re: Larry's block and if we don't try to make a difference for JYL, we will never know...
Posted by special_k on March 31, 2006, at 20:00:35
In reply to Re: Is this helping or hurting JYL?, posted by special_k on March 31, 2006, at 19:48:24
i'm not convinced the transition from rule by one to rule by a few needs to involve labelling the single ruler as a tyrant and a violent overthrowing.
i don't see why it can't be more of a peaceful transition... and why the one ruler can't become part of the few who are ruling...
but if you think it must be violent...
maybe what you expect drives your actions...
and your actions are going to be interpreted in this way...ever thought that buying into plato's description might mean you do the self fulfilling prophecy thing?
why dr bob?
psychological necessity...
is there something about hte power that makes it harder to ease off...or what is up with that???
Posted by special_k on March 31, 2006, at 20:03:41
In reply to YES this is helping, posted by wildcard11 on March 31, 2006, at 19:57:56
> "WE" made a difference re: Larry's block and if we don't try to make a difference for JYL, we will never know...
ah... precedent has been set.
or at least we are indeed left to speculation as he hasn't said anything about why on earth larry got leniency...
well...
there was the 'love' aspect.
i wonder if that will feature here too...
lol.
sigh.
am i really doing this...
what is up with me...
i do respect ya bob...
but you are hard to fathom sometimes...
hurry back...
or maybe you plan to let the deputies handle it then come along and overthrow their decisions?
(er... what kinds of acts tend to lead to one being classified as a 'tyrant' do ya think???)
Posted by Dinah on March 31, 2006, at 20:23:40
In reply to Re: Is this helping or hurting JYL?, posted by special_k on March 31, 2006, at 19:48:24
I'm way more comfortable deputizing for Bob than I would moderating as Dinah. That's why I correct anyone who calls me a moderator. I'm a deputy, not a moderator.
And I say poor Dr. Bob because I wouldn't want his role here for anything.
I know we all complain from time to time. But can you imagine trying to do what's best for a large and diverse community? Along with all that comes with it, the resentment, the transference, everything else?
He must really love Babble a lot.
Posted by sleepygirl on March 31, 2006, at 20:39:18
In reply to The post to JYL should be DELETED!!!!!, posted by wildcard11 on March 31, 2006, at 10:55:24
I'm so sorry about those hurtful things said to you. We care a lot about you. That was a yucky, awful post, and I'd like to banish it! BANISH IT TO THE NETHER REGIONS!!
Posted by Dinah on March 31, 2006, at 20:44:44
In reply to JYL, posted by sleepygirl on March 31, 2006, at 20:39:18
I'm already on record for saying that I was in favor of deleting it.
For whatever good that might do.
Posted by justyourlaugh on March 31, 2006, at 20:57:14
In reply to Re: Is this helping or hurting JYL? » special_k, posted by Dinah on March 31, 2006, at 20:23:40
never to post or read this site again..
1. i care and respect everyone here and everyone who reads..you guys are all i have.
2. i never asked for rules to be broken..just inforced in faq.
3. dr's ace was trumped..i emailed him first to delete..he stated it was not "inappropiate" enough..this was before the post was responded too..
if i said to the dr what was said to me, would i be told if i should take a right or left at steels for the babble party?..oh yah..no left turns any more..
thank you for the support..your words
saved me (trigger trigger trigger).please turn your support over to the deputies..
help them improve your site.
best of peace.
best of life.
fondly(love you jan)
sj
Posted by Dinah on March 31, 2006, at 21:04:07
In reply to i promised myself.., posted by justyourlaugh on March 31, 2006, at 20:57:14
Posted by wildcard11 on March 31, 2006, at 21:06:44
In reply to I'm so sorry (nm) » justyourlaugh, posted by Dinah on March 31, 2006, at 21:04:07
i know you're hurting and i wish i could take it away...(((((((jyl))))))) stay strong!
Posted by special_k on March 31, 2006, at 21:11:08
In reply to Re: Is this helping or hurting JYL? » special_k, posted by Dinah on March 31, 2006, at 20:23:40
> And I say poor Dr. Bob because I wouldn't want his role here for anything.mmm. in my better moments i agree...
but still...
i think he should have given auntiemel her head in this instant...
and i think it would be helpful to point out the circumstances under which 'leniency' might come into things (ie in larry's case)
is that going to be a relevant precedent for other cases?
and i'm still a bit pissed about not telling people before posting about the competition thing...
mostly...
because it is reminding me of something else he did...
and he was like 'sorry i didn't mean for you to find out in that way'
and i remember thinking... i wonder... or i wonder if it just never occured to him at all...
and i'm just wondering whether he 'forgot' to tell people or whether it just never occured to him at all...
and i guess it just reminds me that it isn't so safe... that he isn't so careful about people's feelings... probably because he doesn't understand...
and it isn't supposed to be about this sh*t anyway...
and i bet he is just dying for us to get sick of him so he can f*ck off and have more independence or whatever
:-(
but then i am in a pretty foul mood today...
:-(
Posted by verne on March 31, 2006, at 21:25:48
In reply to The post to JYL should be DELETED!!!!!, posted by wildcard11 on March 31, 2006, at 10:55:24
I agree. There's something almost sadistic about letting the post stand. That kind of personal attack shouldn't be condoned in any shape or form - especially on a "support" site.
The harm even extends to the offending poster - no matter how repentant, he will never live it down. The babble archive holds a grudge - long time.
Perhaps, the lesson is that everything in Babble stays in Babble.
Verne
Posted by madeline on March 31, 2006, at 21:35:51
In reply to i promised myself.., posted by justyourlaugh on March 31, 2006, at 20:57:14
stay safe JYL. And peace right back to you.
If you do decide to drift back to babble, I think we all would be very happy to see you.
This shouldn't be about Dr. Bob. This is about us.
Take care, take good good care.
Maddie.
Posted by ClearSkies on April 1, 2006, at 5:49:43
In reply to i promised myself.., posted by justyourlaugh on March 31, 2006, at 20:57:14
You're all I really have here, you know. A true and honest friend with whom I can confide anything at any time.
I do thank Babble for this gift of friendship.
And I will fight the good fight for making this a safer place, though it is probably tipping at windmills. But every contribution has to make a difference; it just has to. Getting boards to boost our fragile self esteems; suggesting books to read to encourage us to be nicer to each other. I have to do what feels right to me.
Thanks so much for all your gifts of words that has made this a place I want to be at.
ClearSkies
Posted by sabrina0805 on April 3, 2006, at 2:51:41
In reply to Re: i promised myself.. » justyourlaugh, posted by ClearSkies on April 1, 2006, at 5:49:43
I really commend your efforts ClearSkies, in what is clearly not always a very pleasant task. I have babble to thank for many friendships, your included. I hope to never lose those. You are courageous to fight the good fight and I wish you strength. I am sorry that I won't be here much to support you.
You have my love though.
Sabrina
Posted by Dr. Bob on April 5, 2006, at 18:31:36
In reply to Re: restored it » Dr. Bob, posted by muffled on March 29, 2006, at 9:54:47
> This place is only about POLICY??????????
> We are PEOPLE Dr. Bob, hurting PEOPLE. We EXIST.I know, and I'm sorry about that. Still, the idea here is for people who are hurting to receive support from other posters rather than from me.
Bob
Posted by muffled on April 5, 2006, at 19:00:59
In reply to Re: restored it, posted by Dr. Bob on April 5, 2006, at 18:31:36
> > This place is only about POLICY??????????
> > We are PEOPLE Dr. Bob, hurting PEOPLE. We EXIST.
>
> I know, and I'm sorry about that. Still, the idea here is for people who are hurting to receive support from other posters rather than from me.
>
> BobDuh, I'm not talking about support from you. Wouldn't want it from you. What I just wanted was a harmful post deleted. I see no good reason why it cannot be removed.
And your sorry bout what?
I'm not clear on that.
Muffled
Posted by Dr. Bob on April 7, 2006, at 1:58:47
In reply to Re: restored it » Dr. Bob, posted by muffled on April 5, 2006, at 19:00:59
> Duh, I'm not talking about support from you. Wouldn't want it from you. What I just wanted was a harmful post deleted.
But wouldn't the reason to delete it be to support those who are hurting?
Bob
Posted by Dinah on April 7, 2006, at 8:35:21
In reply to Re: restored it, posted by Dr. Bob on April 7, 2006, at 1:58:47
Dr. Bob, perhaps you'd like to rephrase that. I've got the feeling it didn't come out as you intended.
That's something other posters *can't* do. But they did petition you to do it. You would just be enabling their support.
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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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