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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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Posted by Toph on June 5, 2005, at 14:51:41
In reply to You look maavalous, posted by Toph on May 24, 2005, at 20:19:50
I've become involved in this place where I can congregate with others who like me have had some difficulties with life at times. There, I can get some things off my chest and work out a few things and learn a few things. The people seem nice, most of them anyway. I begin to curtail my involvement for a variety of reasons and then there's this party. Well, I'm not exactly Mr. Lifeoftheparty so I should pass on it, right? No, somehow I have this need to prove that I am real to others and to validate to myself that this all the time spend on this site isn't some narcissitic delusion of mine. So I go.
But it’s a little scary and I almost abort when the plans were too freeform for my liking. I drive to Chicago anyway and just as I'm nearing Navy Pier, the cell phone rings. I fumble to pick it up driving through unfamiliar streets with honking cars and darting pedestrians who ostensibly are attempting to commit suicide. "Where are you?" I hear faintly. "Ohio" I shout back reading the Ohio street sign. "I must have the wrong number," I hear before the call is terminated. Oh, sh*t, that wasn't my wife that was AuntieMel. Good start.
I call Mel back and explain that I thought she was my wife and it dawns on me I'm digging a deeper hole by suggesting that it's OK to yell at my wife. This isn't going well and I'm not even there yet. I can’t find a parking lot so I park at the nearest meter. No quarters. F*ck it. I start running toward the huge ferris wheel. I think manicly that here I have a whole thread about whether I can attend or not and then what happens, I turn into a Babble cliché for missing the boat, literally. I’m panicing. Ohmygod I’m starting to sweat. What if they hug?
I see this gathering of people and a guy wearing a straw hat transporting a camera with large phallic telephoto lens. There are hundreds of people milling about but that has to be Bob. I sheepishly advance after smelling my armpits. Everything is sort of a blur in my memory except the impression that everyone looks so normal and everyone seems so nice and, well, everyone seems so comfortable with everyone else. We board the boat, and it strikes me that no one is either leading or following. We all kind of make these decisions on where to sit or what to eat or where to go so easily. I’m so pleased that Chicago cooperated. This is my city and it appeared stunning to me from the boat.
Speaking of appearances, well, that’s the risk I guess to meeting. Our masks were coming down and we were going to be exposed. For those of you who want to know what we look like, all I can tell you is that the people I met are among the most beautiful people I know. They are who we hope to be - interesting, smart, funny and kind. There are parties you attend where you leave thinking to yourself what a waste of time. My regret this day is that I hade little time to speak individually with each person. And I would have loved to talk with everyone there for a day at a time. Anyway, it was nice to get the appearance thing out of the way. Everyone seemed to be above judging each other on looks. The weather also helped when the sky opened up and turned the event into a wet t-shirt contest. (Poet won, BTW). It’s hard to look cool when you look like a wet rat.
It was important for me to meet Bob. If this experience was about reality testing, well, it was definitely that for the other posters, but only slightly for Bob. I have developed a respect for him because his site is a supportive and safe place for people like me to associate. He was engaging but unwilling to open up much. I got the distinct impression that he had a sort of paternal sense of satisfaction that his virtual family was as wonderful as he had imagined. It is. His appreciative goodbye to us Saturday was really heartfelt.
You know, it’s really important for me, having lost touch with reality on several occasions, to reality-test things that I fear are illusory. Psycho-Babble has been a wonderful place to test out disclosing secret parts of myself with others. Sometimes I have been saddened by a sense that the relationships and the emotions on Psycho-Babble are only an illusion in my mind. It somehow seems all so much more real to me now.
Toph
Posted by alexandra_k on June 5, 2005, at 15:23:39
In reply to Impressions, posted by Toph on June 5, 2005, at 14:51:41
Thank you Toph
that was beautiful
:-)
Posted by NikkiT2 on June 5, 2005, at 15:38:10
In reply to Re: Impressions » Toph, posted by alexandra_k on June 5, 2005, at 15:23:39
hey, everyone (other than those that live here) love London or dream of coming!! *grins*
Posted by rainbowbrite on June 5, 2005, at 16:49:03
In reply to Impressions, posted by Toph on June 5, 2005, at 14:51:41
Toph that was nicely put. I agree that it would have been nice to have had more time to spend with each person. But for a pretty big group I think we did well! Im sorry that I missed Bob's goodbye :-(
Posted by alexandra_k on June 5, 2005, at 16:52:37
In reply to London!!, posted by NikkiT2 on June 5, 2005, at 15:38:10
I'd love to go to London.
I don't imagine I could afford it for the next 5 years or so... But I do think it would be nice if the Babble party could get to London.How about Toronto
then Sydney
then London??????Sydney for purely selfish reasons, of course :-)
Though thinking of Damos too, I suppose...
Posted by Poet on June 5, 2005, at 19:46:11
In reply to Impressions, posted by Toph on June 5, 2005, at 14:51:41
Hi Toph,
I felt right at ease, too. No intense anxiety. Even when I won the wet T shirt contest.
Poet
Posted by Dinah on June 5, 2005, at 20:00:38
In reply to Re: Thank you annierose!, posted by Spoc on June 4, 2005, at 16:16:37
You did a fabulous job.
I hope everything's ok again?
Posted by Larry Hoover on June 5, 2005, at 22:10:29
In reply to London!!, posted by NikkiT2 on June 5, 2005, at 15:38:10
> hey, everyone (other than those that live here) love London or dream of coming!! *grins*
I was in London for a couple of weeks, back in in '93. I recall getting off the tube at Piccadilly, and coming up and getting a jacket potato at a stand there, and shopping. I liked London a lot. All that history! And the museums!
We got to the Tower real early one day, and they had just opened up. No one else was about, so we got to spend as much time as we liked in with the crown jewels and all that.
Lar
Posted by Larry Hoover on June 5, 2005, at 22:13:18
In reply to Beg to differ....NYC 2006! :-) (nm) » Poet, posted by TofuEmmy on June 5, 2005, at 11:38:39
Nuh-uh, Ms. Butt-inski.
Doc Bob offered up Toronto, the weekend of May 19-21, 2006. Many people have already said how much that would be to their liking.
A theme has already been selected, in fact.
Sorry, dear.
Lar
Posted by gardenergirl on June 5, 2005, at 23:04:44
In reply to Re: Beg to differ....not NYC 2006! » TofuEmmy, posted by Larry Hoover on June 5, 2005, at 22:13:18
And tired as all get out.
What a wonderful time. I echo what the others have said, and wowsa, Toph! Eloquent, funny, and fabulous post. It was great to meet you and everone else.
I've got to let stuff percolate a bit before posting my impressions.
Wish everyone a lovely experience like this.
gg
Posted by All Done on June 5, 2005, at 23:45:25
In reply to Re: Thank you annierose!, posted by Spoc on June 4, 2005, at 16:16:37
The gift bags were such a nice touch, annierose! Thank you. And thanks for all the planning and coordination. Sorry you couldn't stay longer, though. We missed you.
Posted by All Done on June 5, 2005, at 23:50:27
In reply to Thanks All Done, Annierose, Auntie Mel, Dinah..., posted by Poet on June 5, 2005, at 11:05:10
That's half a hug from me. GG will have to come with the other half. :)
Umm...Greek chorus. Did I miss something?
Oh dear. I'm afraid I'm going to get us kicked over to Social pretty soon.
Posted by All Done on June 6, 2005, at 0:05:29
In reply to Impressions, posted by Toph on June 5, 2005, at 14:51:41
Wonderful post, Toph!
Thanks for giving us the opportunity to meet the guy behind all the thoughtful and creative posts :).
Laurie
Posted by gardenergirl on June 6, 2005, at 1:38:31
In reply to Re: (((((poet » Poet, posted by All Done on June 5, 2005, at 23:50:27
Here's my half, as promised. :)
gg
Posted by All Done on June 6, 2005, at 1:41:40
In reply to Re: Impressions » Toph, posted by All Done on June 6, 2005, at 0:05:29
Thank you, Dr. Bob, for giving us a place to find each other and a reason for this weekend.
:-)
Posted by annierose on June 6, 2005, at 6:54:24
In reply to Back home safe and sound, posted by gardenergirl on June 5, 2005, at 23:04:44
Glad to hear you made it back! I was thinking about your long drive yesterday. We had some rough thunderstorms pass through the midwest, so I worried.
I was a re-do! So mad at myself for letting my hubby get to me.
Annierose
Posted by Larry Hoover on June 6, 2005, at 8:45:10
In reply to Re: Back home safe and sound » gardenergirl, posted by annierose on June 6, 2005, at 6:54:24
Posted by Larry Hoover on June 6, 2005, at 8:58:36
In reply to Is there going to be a photo somewhere? (nm) » annierose, posted by Larry Hoover on June 6, 2005, at 8:45:10
Posted by TofuEmmy on June 6, 2005, at 9:08:24
In reply to Re: Beg to differ....not NYC 2006! » TofuEmmy, posted by Larry Hoover on June 5, 2005, at 22:13:18
What part of DO NOT POST TO ME did you not understand?
I repeat...DO NOT POST TO ME.
Posted by Larry Hoover on June 6, 2005, at 9:30:53
In reply to Re: Beg to differ....not NYC 2006! » Larry Hoover, posted by TofuEmmy on June 6, 2005, at 9:08:24
Posted by Deneb on June 6, 2005, at 10:53:15
In reply to I'm truly sorry. It won't happen again. (nm), posted by Larry Hoover on June 6, 2005, at 9:30:53
Posted by fallsfall on June 6, 2005, at 11:35:53
In reply to Re: ((((Larry))))...((((TofuEmmy)))) (nm), posted by Deneb on June 6, 2005, at 10:53:15
I feel like I haven't said much about the weekend. But it is hard to know what to say. Except that it was fabulous beyond my wildest dreams.
Everyone was so authentic. It took no time to be comfortable because we already know each other. It is interesting because usually you see people first, and come up with a "first impression", and then (over time) get to know who they really are (if you are lucky). But with us, we *know* who each other really is, and the seeing seemed more like just figuring out which body belonged to which person. There was additional information gleaned from being together - gestures, facial expressions, accents, pace of talking, real live hugs. But it really is interesting to get these pieces of information second rather than first.
I was not surprised by anyone - no one was vastly different from the person I know through the board. Spoc was the hardest - but while she might not be what I expected (I think I was still expecting a guy...), her on-board persona really does fit perfectly with her IRL person.
It was a very intense weekend (next year we should schedule naps in the afternoons - can we find a kindergarten that would lend us their mats for the weekend?). And I think it will take me some time to digest all that I observed.
I want to tell each person who came how special they are. But it is too overwhelming to find the words right now.
As exhausting as the weekend was, I feel energized and alive!
Thanks, Dr. Bob, for making all of this possible (and for being a real person yourself). Thanks to all who attended for being such special people. And I'm looking forward to meeting more Babblers over time - what an amazing group.
Posted by Spoc on June 6, 2005, at 11:57:24
In reply to Authenticity, posted by fallsfall on June 6, 2005, at 11:35:53
> I was not surprised by anyone - no one was vastly different from the person I know through the board. Spoc was the hardest - but while she might not be what I expected (I think I was still expecting a guy...), her on-board persona really does fit perfectly with her IRL person.
EEEK! I hope I can take "hardest" to mean, closest to being vastly unlike what you expected! ;-) One of the reasons I wanted to come was to show after all this time that whatever a "Spoc" is, I'm not like one; and amongst other things, I actually DON'T talk a ton or drone on (and on and on...) in person, lol!
Posted by rainbowbrite on June 6, 2005, at 12:06:28
In reply to Re: Authenticity » fallsfall, posted by Spoc on June 6, 2005, at 11:57:24
Aww spoc is adorable and doesnt even have pointy ears LOL and so not a spoc to me, way too pretty. she is a sparkle to me...Ive thought she should change her name to sparkle or sparkly forever.
Posted by rainbowbrite on June 6, 2005, at 12:15:34
In reply to Sparkle not spoc, posted by rainbowbrite on June 6, 2005, at 12:06:28
Its kinda funny how the name you gave yourself turned out to be so 'spocky' considering how girlie you actually are LOL
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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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